Event

The road, Thorrior

1

arts@sfbg.com

MUSIC There’s no easy way to describe Valient Thorr. Hailing from Chapel Hill, N.C., the quintet has labored throughout its career under the strain of countless casual characterizations, each less accurate than the one before it. Reached by phone in Raleigh, N.C., as he prepared for the band’s impending tour with Motorhead, singer Valient Himself gives the wry rundown.

“Forever, in The Onion, it said ‘Kiss-like band, biker band’ or some shit. None of us ride motorcycles!” he scoffs. Nor, for that matter, does the band wear elaborate makeup or sell branded coffins. The mistakes, however, continued. “People would say something like ‘Lynyrd Skynyrd-esque’ or some shit like that,” complains Valient. “We don’t play Southern rock. We have accents from the South because those are the colloquialisms that we have been accustomed to since we crash-landed here. Or they look at ‘Thorr’ and they say, ‘Oh, they’re Vikings.’ If you could pick three adjectives that we get called the most that are totally wrong, they’d be Southern, Viking, biker metal.”

Now, if you’ve been paying attention so far, you’ll have noticed that the singer goes by an outlandish pseudonym and makes offhand references to things like “crash landing.” By “here,” in the previous paragraph, he means “planet Earth.” This is because the band Valient Thorr claims, with a straight face, to be from the inside of the planet Venus. Valient Himself, a former sixth-grade teacher, sticks to his story throughout the interview, even when gently prodded to discourse on non-Venusian topics.

The band’s beginnings can be traced to East Carolina University, where the five Thorrs (Valient Himself, Eidan, Lucian, Sadat, and Dr. Professor Nitewolf Strangees Thorr) were masquerading as undergraduates. Nurtured by the college radio culture that defined their adopted home state for much of the 1990s, the band soon discovered the geographic advantages of hailing from the Tar Heel State, which features nine midsized cities along the axis of Highway 40, which neatly bisects it into northern and southern halves.

Before long, Valient Thorr was traveling nationwide, hitting 47 cities in 52 days on its first trip out. This relentless dedication to touring would come to define the band, which has effectively been on tour since Valient’s career in the classroom ended in 2005. That event also marked the last time he cut his beard, a fiery red thatch that has since attained truly epic proportions.

Though Valient Thorr’s music — a combination of the rabid, breakneck pace of punk rock and the precision guitar work of classic Thin Lizzy — produces some infectious, exultant tunes, the onstage charisma of the band in general and the singer in particular forms the most important part of its appeal. Clad in impossibly tight pants, cherry-red wrestling shoes, and little else, Valient prowls the stage soaked in sweat, striking mock-muscleman poses and exhorting the audience with the inexhaustible, manic energy of a true rock ‘n’ roll evangelist.

The power of Valient Thorr’s proselytizing can be seen at any show. A growing legion of die-hard fans, called Thorriors, pledge allegiance to the band above all others, often sporting customized jean jackets as emblems of their dedication. In that sense, at least, the band is like Kiss. One Thorrior, a Kansas City native, has even been granted an honorary Venusian surname; “Tim Thorr,” as he is known, “has more Thorrior tattoos than anyone else” explains Valient. “We call him the True Believer.”

Touring with a band as well-known as Motorhead, Valient Thorr is sure to win more converts to its cause. But whether people like it or not, or whether they believe it or not, the Thorrs will be out there. “I think performing is in your blood,” Valient says. “I think everyone was born to do something. We didn’t go to school to be rock ‘n’ rollers — it’s just something that came out of us. It’s an idea that started and it just had to happen.” *

VALIENT THORR with Motorhead, Clutch

Wed/2, 8 p.m.; $35

The Warfield

982 Market, SF

(415) 345-0900

www.thewarfieldtheatre.com

 

Dreadfully fun

0

Dead Space 2

(Visceral Games/Electronic Arts), Xbox 360, PS3, PC

GAMER Survival horror might be the game genre most affected by the environment it’s played in. You’ll see the best results when a player agrees to meet the title halfway: turning out the lights and turning up the volume. Then it’s up to the developers to deliver on their half of the equation. Though generally lauded when it released in 2008, the original Dead Space launched with promise but ultimately was content to repeat itself for the majority of its playtime.

Dead Space 2 delivers. An homage to movies like 1979’s Alien and 1997’s Event Horizon (which it most closely resembles), the Dead Space series is set in a future where space travel allows humans to embark on “planet cracking” missions, wherein all celestial bodies of the galaxy are prime meat for resource-exhausting expeditions. On one such expedition the shuttle finds an alien artifact, contagion, blah blah blah … zombies. A pretty first-rate “previously on” feature in the main menu will catch anyone up to speed.

As engineer Isaac Clarke, it’s up to you to survive this “necromorph” outbreak, this time aboard a space station named the Sprawl. Armed with a ton of weaponry and a little kinetic energy module, you’ll have to escape another apocalypse of the undead, as always by dismembering their arms and legs (and tentacles).

Perhaps taking a cue from last year’s Mass Effect 2‘s streamlining successes, Dead Space 2 is far more linear and cinematic than its predecessor. But unlike that other similarly space-themed sequel, the divide between what is lost and what is gained in the transition is far less apparent. In embracing the hallmarks of any good survival horror series — jump scares, the feeling of dread around each corner, and limited supplies — this sequel is less about innovation than it is about refinement.

Contrary to the drab shuttle hallways of the first game, the Sprawl was once a bustling metropolis and the environments you encounter are much more varied. From a church to a mall to zero-gravity space walks, the freshness in each area keeps it exciting. While the scares range from terrifyingly atmospheric (a bloodstained and deserted daycare center is especially eerie) to inelegant “monster closets” where enemies pop out of vents as you walk past, the game is never boring.

After a promising debut and a bit of a misstep with the God of War-aping Dante’s Inferno (2010), with Dead Space 2 developer Visceral Games has crafted an adventure that begs to be played more than once. Aspects remain overly familiar but, like the best franchises, the Sprawl provides players with a compelling setting and sense of dread that they’ll happily return to.

Our Weekly Picks: February 2-8

0

WEDNESDAY 2

MUSIC

Billy and Dolly

Have you noticed? Like clockwork, the buds on the ornamental plum trees are starting to power pop their thin pink petals, making sidewalks more poetic all across the city. Ephemeral yet impressive, the changing season awakens melodies of Billy and Dolly, the local singing and songwriting duo formerly of the Monolith. The guy-girl combo is backed by the Tell-Tale Hearts, a sonic unity of 20 Minute Loop’s rockin’ guitar-bass team and the Monolith’s drummer. The harmonies are deliciously poppy and achingly bittersweet, reminiscent of Elliott Smith, were he not so chronically bummed and had a lovely lady voice as a complement. Beware: between the trees and the tunes, it’s all so pretty, it just might hurt your heart. (Kat Renz)

With Tristen and the Corner Laughers

8 p.m., $10

Rickshaw Stop

155 Fell, SF

(415) 861-2011

www.rickshawstop.com

 

MUSIC

Hymn For Her

You think living in a studio apartment with two roommates is cozy? Well, think again. ‘Cause you’ve got nothing on Lucy Tight and Wayne Waxing, of Americana duo Hymn For Her that live, record, and tour in their 16-foot, 1961 Bambi Airstream trailer — along with a baby and dog. And they somehow manage to fit a three-stringed, broom-handle cigar box, banjo, dobro, bass drum, hi-hat, and harp in there, too. In true Hymn For Her fashion, its newest release, the cleverly spelled Lucy and Wayne and the Amairican Stream, was recorded at various campgrounds and friends’ driveways while on tour. Better catch them before they pack up Bambi and hit the road. (Jen Verzosa)

With Tippy Canoe

Wed/2, 7 p.m., free

Mama Buzz Café

2138 Telegraph, Oakl.

(510) 465-4073

www.mamabuzzcafe.com

With That Ghost

Thurs/3, 9 p.m., call for price

Amnesia

853 Valencia, SF

(415) 970-0012

www.amnesiathebar.com

Sun/6, 9 p.m., $6

Hemlock Tavern

1131 Polk, SF

www.hemlocktavern.com

 

THURSDAY 3

DANCE

Jess Curtis/Gravity

Jess Curtis/Gravity is a company that lives up to, and defies, the connotations in that noun attached to the name of its artistic director. Choreographer-performer Curtis and his eclectic collaborators display an alternately cool and passionate, always irreverent intelligence, wholly immersed in the unfathomable ocean of the human body. They’re the Jacques Cousteaus of this deep: its champions and endlessly curious, enthralled students. For audiences, that means a good time, a weird time, a heavy-breathing and emotionally up-heaving time, and a time to question things we thought we knew. The company’s latest voyage, Dances for Non/Fictional Bodies, is a sprawling work whose central event — a subjectivity-shifting convergence of “nontraditional” dancer-bodies — sets sail this weekend. (Robert Avila)

Thurs/3–Sat/6, 8 p.m., $25

Yerba Buena Center for the Arts

701 Mission, SF

(415) 978-2787

www.ybca.org

 

MUSIC

Ozzy Osbourne

Though he’s backed by a new lead guitarist (Greek virtuoso Gus G.) and brandishing a new album, Ozzy Osbourne isn’t likely to conquer much new territory on his 2011 Scream tour. Nor does anyone want him to. The Prince of Fucking Darkness is still revered by a healthy portion of the headbanging public, a polity that will undoubtedly spend the show demanding a hearty helping of songs from his ant-snorting, dove-decapitating, “Crazy Train”-riding salad days. Whatever your opinion on the world’s most incomprehensible celebrity, his charisma can still get an arena rocking. Whether that’s because of — or in spite of — his infallible propensity for mooning the audience, no one can say. But as the Blizzard of Ozz would no doubt put it: “who fucking cares?” (Ben Richardson)

With Slash featuring Myles Kennedy

7:30 p.m., $44–$92

H.P. Pavilion

525 West Santa Clara, San Jose

(408) 287-7070

www.hppsj.com

 

FRIDAY 4

EVENT

“San Francisco Bike Party February 2011 Ride: Love Your Bike”

It’s prettiest much the buzziest thing on SF bikes since American-made handlebar beer can — uh, cup — holders: the SF Bike Party, spawned from the San Jose Bike Party and a member of the same family as the East Bay Bike Party. Sources say the mass bike ride, which makes complete stops for traffic lights and the occasional drink-and-mingle sidewalk party, marks a logical evolution for the city bike activism. Despite what the comments on SF Gate say, cycles in the city are no longer the purview of a handful of iron-calved fixie followers — there’s room for a little softness among the two-wheeled, which explains this month’s V-Day-ready ride theme: “love your bike.” A map of the route will be available on the group’s website closer to push-off. (Caitlin Donohue)

7:30 p.m., free

www.sfbikeparty.wordpress.com

 

MUSIC

Madlib

Titles are de rigueur in hip-hop. O.D.B. once attended a debutante ball that ended before his introduction finished. (His date was devastated.) Otis Jackson Jr., best known as Madlib and other variations (Madvillain with fellow schizo MF Doom, Jaylib with late sobriquet champion J Dilla) has racked up numerous names over the last two decades. For Madlib, the aliases are appropriate given the diverse projects he tackles as DJ, producer, MC, and uber stoner (expect at least a contact high.) His latest release, Madlib Medicine Show, is a gargantuan monthly series of 12 albums that attempt to fill in the blanks on your understanding of hip-hop. (Ryan Prendiville)

With Robot Koch, Change the Beat, and more

10 p.m., $15

103 Harriet, SF

(415) 431-1200

www.1015.com

 

DANCE

“Rotunda Dance Series: Leung’s White Crane Chinese Lion Dancing”

Just a day after Chinese new year begins, the blaring drums, clashing cymbals, soaring lions, and dancing dragons of Leung’s White Crane Chinese Lion Dancing appear in San Francisco City Hall, bringing the colorful ancient tradition to the free lunchtime Rotunda Dance Series, copresented by Dancers’ Group and World Arts West. The three Leung brothers — Kuen, Kwan and Allen — moved to SF in the 1970s, carrying the Lion Dancing teachings of their master Kwong Boon Fu from Hong Kong. Performing internationally and teaching in Chinatown for more than 35 years, they are treasured for their larger-than-life performances in the city’s Chinese New Year Parade. (Julie Potter)

Noon, free

San Francisco City Hall

One Dr. Carlton B. Goodlett Place, SF

(415) 720-8830

www.dancersgroup.org

 

SATURDAY 5

EVENT

“Free University of San Francisco Teach-in”

An idea this crazy just might work! Sick of the gouge-y tuition hikes in our public and private education systems, a band of merry SF radicals have decided to launch an ambitious campaign to free learnin’. After a surprisingly light number of planning meetings, this is the first of the Free University’s offerings: a weekend of classes to inspire and hopefully serve as a community-builder for those who think our current university system is broken. On the lectern: beat poet Diane di Prima on 19th century visionary poetry, revolutionary poet Bobby Coleman on SF labor history, classes on criminal procedure, paganism, Kerouac, and more. (Donohue)

Sat/5, 9:30 a.m.–4 p.m.;

Sun/6, 9 a.m.–4 p.m., free

Viracocha

998 Valencia, SF

www.fusf.wordpress.com

 

SUNDAY 6

FILM

Every Man for Himself

Forever the enfant terrible of cinema, Jean-Luc Godard is skipping the lifetime achievement lineup at this year’s Oscars. This has stirred up a predictably dumb controversy in the American press over bullshit claims that Godard is anti-Semitic. Never mind the philistines — we’re still awaiting a local screening of the maestro’s 2010 Film Socialism. In the meantime, a 35mm restoration of 1980’s Every Man for Himself at the Red Vic does nicely. Godard called this lyrical examination of art and commerce intertwined his second first film, and its formal ingenuities and philosophical knots remain refreshing. Support the Red Vic by ponying up for extra popcorn! (Max Goldberg)

Sun/6–Mon/7, 7:15 and 9:15 p.m.

Also Sun/6, 2 and 4 p.m., $6–$9

Red Vic Movie House

1727 Haight, SF

(415) 668-3994

www.redvicmoviehouse.com

 

MONDAY 7

EVENT

Replikaaa Silent Happening: A Multimedia Performance Art Event”

Sometimes you just don’t have much to say. Or perhaps your ears are ringing from all those noisy bars. To exercise the other senses visit this chic silent cocktail party where guests practice the art of nonverbal communication, watching and connecting without words. The unusual and participatory social experience presented by Al’Myra Communications includes a preview screening of Tayeb Al-Hafez’s silent film Replikaaa, a mysterious and futuristic work about five DNA and organ traffickers, to be followed by local artist performances. Reserve a free ticket online and then shut your mouth. Whether you wink, gesticulate, or show some funky dance moves is up to you. Chatty Cathys discouraged. (Potter)

7 p.m., free

Z Space

450 Florida, SF

(415) 891-9544

www.replikaaathemovie.com

 

TUESDAY 8

MUSIC

Sebadoh

In the vein of Guided By Voices and Pavement, Sebadoh has been dubbed “the quintessential indie rock band of the 1990s” — and like that decade’s flannel-shirt trend, they’re back. After getting the heave-ho in 1988 as bassist of alt-rock band Dinosaur Jr. (he rejoined in 2005), multi-instrumentalist Lou Barlow focused on the DIY project he had started with Eric Gaffney. Sebadoh soon became infamous for its bipolar swings from lo-fi, touchy-feely folk to experimental noise rock. With the addition of bassist Jason Loewenstein, the three-piece became a hit among the hip. Eventually Gaffney jumped ship (he rejoined in 2007) and was replaced by drummer Bob Fay. This lineup recorded the band’s most accessible albums, 1994’s Bakesale and 1996’s Harmacy, both of which are being re-released by Sub Pop Records this year and are the reason for the current tour. (Verzosa)

With Quasi

7 p.m., $20

Great American Music Hall

859 O’Farrell, SF

www.gamh.com

 

FILM

The Ipcress File

Move over, Christopher Walken: there’s a new star du jour for celebrity imitation freaks. You can’t help but try your hand at Michael Caine’s Cockney accent after watching the hilarious clip from the BBC show The Trip of comedians Steve Coogan and Rob Brydon engaging in a rousing round of dueling Caine-jos. (Search “This is how Michael Caine speaks” on YouTube. You’re welcome.) Polish your early-period Caine impersonation by checking out a rare screening of 1965 secret-agent thriller The Ipcress File, which showcases the legendary actor in his first starring role. The film plays as part of four nights of highlights from the “Mostly British Film Festival,” with other entries hailing from New Zealand and Australia. (Cheryl Eddy)

7 p.m., $10.25

Christopher B. Smith Rafael Film Center

1118 Fourth St., San Rafael

(415) 454-1222

www.cafilm.org

 

The Guardian listings deadline is two weeks prior to our Wednesday publication date. To submit an item for consideration, please include the title of the event, a brief description of the event, date and time, venue name, street address (listing cross streets only isn’t sufficient), city, telephone number readers can call for more information, telephone number for media, and admission costs. Send information to Listings, the Guardian Building, 135 Mississippi St., SF, CA 94107; fax to (415) 487-2506; or e-mail (paste press release into e-mail body — no text attachments, please) to listings@sfbg.com. Digital photos may be submitted in jpeg format; the image must be at least 240 dpi and four inches by six inches in size. We regret we cannot accept listings over the phone.

Rep Clock

0

Schedules are for Wed/2–Tues/8 except where noted. Director and year are given when available. Double and triple features are marked with a •. All times are p.m. unless otherwise specified.

ARTISTS’ TELEVISION ACCESS 992 Valencia, SF; www.atasite.org. $6-10. “Reagan’s 100th Birthday,” a collection of the former Prez’s finest and most ironic on-screen moments curated by Bryan Boyce, Sun, 7:30.

CASTRO 429 Castro, SF; (415) 621-6120, www.castrotheatre.com. $7.50-10. “SF Sketchfest Great Collaborators Series: Tribute to Murphy Brown,” with Candice Bergen and Diane English in person for a Q&A moderated by Connie Chung, Wed, 7. For more info on this event (tickets, $25), visit www.sfsketchfest.com. “Anne Francis: 1930-2011:” •Bad Day at Black Rock (Sturges, 1955), Fri, 1:30, 5:05, 8:55, and Forbidden Planet (Wilcox, 1956), Fri, 3:10, 7. “SF Sketchfest: True Stories 25th Anniversary: David Byrne in Conversation with Paul Myers:” True Stories (Byrne, 1986), Sat, 5. For more info on this event (tickets, $35), visit www.sfsketchfest.com. “SF Sketchfest and Midnight Mass present Idol Worship: An Evening with Cloris Leachman hosted by Peaches Christ:” High Anxiety (Brooks, 1977), Sat, 8:30. For more info on this event (tickets, $25), visit www.sfsketchfest.com.

CHRISTOPHER B. SMITH RAFAEL FILM CENTER 1118 Fourth St, San Rafael; (415) 454-1222, www.cafilm.org. $6.50-10.25. The Illusionist (Chomet, 2010), call for dates and times. Nuremberg: Its Lesson for Today (Schulberg, 1948/2010), call for dates and times. “Mostly British Film Festival:” Topp Twins: Untouchable Girls (Pooley, 2009), Mon, 7; The Ipcress File (Furie, 1965), Tues, 7.

COUNTERPULSE 1310 Mission, SF; www.counterpulse.org. $5-10. “50Faggots: How Gay Do You Want to Be Today,” Sat, 3. Screening of online documentary series followed by discussion with director Randall Jenson.

GRAY AREA FOUNDATION FOR THE ARTS 55 Taylor, SF; www.cinemaspeakeasy.com. $5. “Cinema Speakeasy: San Francisco Presents Shorts!”, Thurs, 8.

HUMANIST HALL 390 27th St, Oakl; www.humanisthall.org. $5. South of the Border (Stone, 2009), Wed, 7:30.

MECHANICS’ INSTITUTE 57 Post, SF; (415) 393-0100, rsvp@milibrary.org. $10. “CinemaLit Film Series: New Year’s Revolutions:” Libeled Lady (Conway, 1936), Fri, 6.

PACIFIC FILM ARCHIVE 2575 Bancroft, Berk; (510) 642-5249, www.bampfa.berkeley.edu. $5.50-9.50. “Film 50: History of Cinema: Fantasy Films and Realms of Enchantment:” The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (Wiene, 1920), Wed, 3:10. “Radical Light: Alternative Film and Video in the San Francisco Bay Area:” “Found Footage Films,” Wed, 7:30; “Versions of Veracity: Video, the 1980s,” Sun, 5:30. “African Film Festival 2011:” Shirley Adams (Hermanus, 2009), Thurs, 7; Beyond the Ocean (de Latour, 2008), Sat, 6:30. “Suspicion: The Films of Claude Chabrol and Alfred Hitchcock:” La Femme Infidèle (Chabrol, 1969), Fri, 7; Violette Nozière (Chabrol, 1978), Fri, 9; Vertigo (Hitchcock, 1958), Sat, 8:35. “School Days:” “Screenagers: 13th Annual Bay Area High School Film and Video Festival,” Sat, 3:30. “Cruel Cinema: New Directions in Tamil Film:” Paruthiveeran (Sultan, 2007), Sun, 2.

RED VIC 1727 Haight, SF; (415) 668-3994; www.redvicmoviehouse.com. $6-10. Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars (Pennebaker, 1973), Wed-Thurs, 2, 7:15, 9:15. Unstoppable (Scott, 2010), Fri-Sat, 7:15, 9:20 (also Sat, 2, 4). Every Man For Himself (Godard, 1980), Sun-Mon, 7:15, 9:15 (also Sun, 2, 4). The Jerk (Reiner, 1979), Feb 8-9, 7:15, 9:20 (also Feb 9, 2).

ROXIE 3117 and 3125 16th St, SF; (415) 863-1087, www.roxie.com. $5-9.75. Lemmy (Olliver and Orshoski, 2010), Wed, 7, 9:30. San Francisco Independent Film Festival, Feb 3-17. See film listings or www.sfindie.com for more info.

WAR MEMORIAL VETERANS BUILDING 401 Van Ness, SF; www.upheavalproductions.com. Free. Occupation Has No Future: Militarism and Resistance in Israel/Palestine (Zlutnick, 2020), Thurs, 7:30. Screening followed by a discussion with director David Zlutnick and members of Dialogues Against Militarism. YERBA BUENA CENTER FOR THE ARTS 701 Mission, SF; (415) 978-2787, www.ybca.org. $6-8. “Volume 14: Middle East,” nine videos focusing on the Middle East compiled by ASPECT: The Chronicle of New Media Art, Jan 13-March 27 (gallery hours Thurs-Sat, noon-8; Sun, noon-6). Shoah (Lanzmann, 1985), Sat, 1 (first half); Sun, 1 (second half); Feb 13, 11am (complete film with one-hour break). 

“I guess I just want other people to solve the Rubik’s cube”

0

This much was clear. A conference room full of middle and high schoolers had been assembled and were now working out math problems. On a Sunday. To someone who wept through stats homework, it seemed like a game of Clue, who done this? At the lectern, a man shared formulas one might find useful in attempting a rapid solution of the Rubik’s cube. A series of x’s and y’s to the nth power flashed before the hushed underage audience.

Were these kids really into what was going on, or was this some well-orchestrated parent plot to shut down a perfectly good weekend? It was Mom in the living room with the bribes and threats about not getting into college! But board game detective I was not. This became apparent when the young man in a hoody sitting on my left picked up a cube offhandedly. Without fanfare, his hands began to blur. He lined up the colors in well under a minute and set the cube back down. Welcome to last weekend’s Julia Robinson Mathematics Festival, where math, it appeared, was not just a problem to be solved.

“If you want to put it in basketball terms.” Festival co-organizer Joshua Zucker is explaining to me the difference between kids doing math “exercises,” which he says comprise the majority of schoolwork these days, and “problem solving.” Please, I encourage him, put it in basketball terms. “Exercises are like dribbling down an empty court. Problem solving, that’s like dribbling down a court with a defender on you. Computers do exercises – we want kids to learn how to think.” To further illustrate his point, he proposes I perform a simple mental game involving twisting my wrists together. Blinded by my fear of math, I fail miserably, and he patiently reiterates what I must do to free myself.

Round tables fill the Pauley Ballroom in UC Berkeley’s Martin Luther King, Jr. student union, at which are seated young students, math professionals, and various UC Berkeley faculty. They do not appear to be worried a whit by the prospect of the boxes and equations before them. Each table houses a few kinds of math challenges: here, kids are constructing a massive fractal cube made from folded bits of paper. There, scholars puzzle over math “magic” tricks and geometry formulas, aided by a female NASA scientist. There’s no clear stop and start time – participants circulate around the room at their own pace, parents in tow or mercifully mingling in the seating area at the room’s fringes.

The festival’s format is constructed to encourage kids to think about why we do math — and we’re not talking about that scholarship to Cal here but instead that little thing about how math helps us figure out the world around us (which I concede, if grudgingly). Accordingly, an instruction sheet written by Zucker greets table leaders at the event’s entrance cautioning them that “you’re welcome to encourage group work when you see good opportunities, or encourage individual work, but don’t encourage too strongly: mostly let the kids decide whether they want to work on their own or with their neighbors.” This looseness is a deliberate departure from the other form of extra-curricular activity for the numbers set (ha!): the math competition, and has much to do with the festival’s namesake, female math pioneer and UC Berkeley professor Julia Robinson, who tackled complex theories in the days before people were fully keen on the concept of female mathematicians.

“We think the non-contest atmosphere is more conducive to girls,” says Zucker, who used to teach math at the girls-only Castilleja School in Palo Alto, comparing the festival’s roughly 60-40 boy-girl ratio with the typical 70-30 that one sees at the higher-pressure math contests. Girls, the assumption goes, aren’t into parading their smarts all over the place.

It’s a theory that’s borne out by what I witness at the festival. For the most part, the boys are quick to acknowledge when they perform a particularly astute calculation. The girls seem more content to listen and work through equations on their own steam, though it must be said that a few are far from retiring. 

California College Preparatory Academy ninth grader Breanna Alleyne drags family friend Aaron Johnson over to the table where I sit, puzzling with the mathemagic tricks. The two plow their way through problems along with the help of Eleanor Long, a San Francisco charter school math teacher who came to observe at the festival but wound up working though problems with the students at her table – a kneejerk reaction, it would seem, of a committed educator encountering the academically earnest. 

“We’ve developed a tradition around the event,” says Breanna’s mom Fatima Alleyne, who I catch up with at her welcome table post, where she is checking in festival attendees. Breanna, I note, approaches the subject lightheartedly at the problem-solving tables, and Fatima, a materials scientist at UC Berkeley who works with resonated devices, says their three years of attendance at the festival has to do with framing math in a light that she feels is missing from traditional classrooms these days. “I don’t think you have to have a developed appreciation of math to really enjoy it in this setting. I just want her to see math in a different way than how she gets it in school.”

I ask Alleyne about how times have changed between her years coming up in school and those of Breanna’s. She remembers her scientific curiosity being sparked by her participation in science fairs and other “enrichment activities” outside of school hours. Alleyne just doesn’t see those same diverse opportunities for learning these days. “The activities that encouraged you to participate in math and science – they’re just no longer in existence.”

This relative dearth in chances outside the classroom to connect with like-minded scholars may be one reason why some kids at Julia Robinson clearly benefit from being around the old pros that help out at the festival. Take sixth grader Kyle Asano, who watched the Rubik’s cube lecture sitting on the other side of Scott Okamura, the Rubik’s whiz who had shocked me in the first place and who turned out to be a freshman at Cal who helps facilitate a free speedcubing course. I ask Okamura why he spends his precious free hours away from his math major instructing others in the art of square. “I guess I just want other people to know how to solve the Rubik’s cube,” he smiles. 

Asano, who estimates his best cube-solving time at a minute and 18 seconds, tells us that he, along with a few school friends at Cupertino Middle School, is really into the cubes. “The center cube decides which color the side’s going to be,” he gracefully informs us before pumping Okamura for more info on his particular cube-solving techniques. Later I spot the two at another table, whizzing through 3-D puzzles that would stump an unseasoned hand (mine). Proof in the Pythagorean, it would seem, that the Julia Robinson Festival does indeed provide a thought provoking math experience – in or out of the box.

Photo, above right: Scott Okamura and Kyle Asano, math aficionados squared. Photo by Caitlin Donohue

 

Aerial revolution

0

Consider the rise of the extreme athlete: generations of youngsters (and increasingly, brave older folks) competing to see who could pull the sweetest stunts and survive. Ever wonder how is it that a person can make the transition from earthbound and bipedal to gravity-be-damned dare-devilry? When exactly is the moment that a skater, skier, or snowboarder just lets go and trusts their body to take them up, over, around, and (hopefully) gracefully down to the ground?

Last Tuesday, I attended a press event at House of Air – the newest member of Crissy Field’s collection of renovated airplane hangars in San Francisco’s historic Presidio – where I was treated to a glimpse of how such a transformation might become reality. Not to mention a new way that a public sports facility can play with its community.

Given the Presidio’s military history, you may have been tempted to think the newly opened space at 926 Mason is home to helicopters and jets. But the pilots in House of Air aren’t crew-cutted cadets, and the only high-tech equipment in the corrugated steel hangar is an impressive array of custom-made trampolines. Every day in this house-of-bounce, tomorrow’s extreme sportsters are earning their wings – and there isn’t a major commander in sight.

House of Air is the brainchild of Dave Schaeffer and Paul McGeehan, two extreme sports aficionados who trained together on the Lake Tahoe snowboarding circuit. Their concept was helped off the ground (so to speak) by former Olympic skier Jonny Moseley. All three use trampolines to perfect their aerial artistry, and could commiserate over the difficulty of finding a facility where they could train with their respective equipment. According to Moseley, who raised eyebrows as a youth by flipping over his skis in a gymnastics studio, trampolines were few and far-between and most were used for coaching gymnasts and tumblers.

Large-scale trampolines provide the air time necessary for an athlete to teach his body to do tricks like corkscrews and 360s, serving as crucial incubators before a pro takes to the water, pavement, or snow with a new trick. But until House of Air, the idea of a dedicated facility for extreme athletes was unheard of. Now, the studio fills the void with over 2,000 square feet of trampoline space where serious athletes can perfect their skills in a safe (and soft) environment – and where, I was thrilled to find, even the not-so-extreme can have a blast.

House of Air provides lessons to beginners and more serious students of all ages. Instructors with backgrounds in everything from professional snowboarding to circus acrobatics use a specially designed high-performance trampoline deck to teach techniques to budding athletes. The center’s growing team also supervises two segmented jumping arenas, each about the size of a regulation basketball court, complete with angled trampoline enclosures that extend the bounce factor right up the walls. The facility also includes a kiddy bounce house for the younger set, special event rooms, lockers, and showers.

An average person arriving on the scene would begin their foray into the art of flight by checking out a pair of special House of Air shoes – modified wrestling shoes that provide ankle support. They would then have the option of renting some basic bounce time, participating in an organized game (think P.E. classics gone crazy: dodgeball or volleyball are both served up with a side of spring), or taking a class on the foundations of flying, which is where I wound up bouncing on my visit.

I was a bit apprehensive (read: terrified) as Moseley ushered me up to the trampoline deck and demonstrated a few tricks. He flopped through some sick twists, turns, and flips without missing a beat in our conversation. Then it was my turn.

 

Our intrepid reporter takes to the air at SF’s bounce palace. Photo courtesy of Jonny Moseley

I started with the aptly named “butt-drop”: a move in which the trampolinist replaces a single bounce with a fall on their bum and then – this is the crucial part – returns to her feet without missing a beat. After that, I moved onto “swivel-hips,” wherein the butt-drop is supplemented by a 180 degree revolution on the up-swing. For my final trick, I tried my hand at the sequence that leads up to a front flip: a jump, a fall to all fours, and then a forward rotation that landed me flat on my back. All in all, I wasn’t quite ready for the X Games, but it was killer on the knees and had my quads burning. I had new respect for the little groms busting board-grabs and aerials — and for the brave adults who come to House of Air for the “air conditioning” classes and company team-building sessions. Trampoline dodgeball: a fantastic way to build office camaraderie, or at the very least a good excuse to pummel that passive-aggressive co-worker with a deluge of flying foam rubber.  

Final impressions from the House of Air? Besides the sore thighs, of course? The center seems to be re-thinking the role of the public sports facility, from its boardrooms for the business set to its specially-manufactured props that emulate sports equipment for practicing athletes, like lightweight foam snowboards and a tow rope akin to what a wakeboarder would utilize on the waves. Even the layout of the building itself, which makes use of those large hangar doors to provide jumpers with such an excellent view of the bay one gets the feeling that with one wild leap one might land in the waves, helps to make House of Air a unique resource for the SF community.  

Given the chance to train in a facility like this one as a child, Moseley says he would have been thrilled – and possibly less banged-up in the bargain. “This is the way kids learn to be professionals — without getting hurt.”

 

House of Air, 926 Mason, SF. (415) 345-9675, www.houseofairsf.com

 

 

Activists and former prisoner call for Obama to close Guantánamo

0

The second anniversary of President Obama’s promise to close the Guantánamo Bay detention center was recognized this week at an event about torture and human rights abuse that continue to take place there.

“There doesn’t seem to be an end in sight…as far as we can tell the [Obama] administration has no intention to close it at this point.,” Rini Chakraborty, Western Regional Director of Amnesty International USA, said at a panel discussion about Guantánamo Bay human rights abuses Wednesday at UC Berkeley.

That conclusion contradicts the assertion by White House spokesperson Adam Abrams that closing Guantánamo is still a “national security imperative.” While the White House says President Obama remains unwavering in his commitment to eventually close the center, more than a hundred detainees remain locked up for years without so much as charges brought against them, according to Chakraborty.

Among those featured at the Amnesty International event was former detainee Omar Deghayes who spoke via video conference from the United Kingdom, where he is a citizen. He spent six years at Guantánamo and was released in what even United States officials eventually considered a case of mistaken identity. He was living in Pakistan in 2002 when one night he was abducted from his home by Pakistani security personnel and later taken into American custody.

“They didn’t know anything about us, ” he said, recalling his first interrogations by Americans at the U.S detention center in Bagram, Afghanistan. “They never accused us of anything…then every year they alleged something and then realized it is completely false…then the next year they would make something up that was more believable.”

What led to Deghayes’ release was a deal with the United Kingdom, where his family conducted a wide campaign to pressure British politicians into action. President Obama has made two recent statements about Guantánamo, stressing the importance of and difficulties inherent in closing Guantánamo Bay, but neither statement gave any indication of when the closure would happen.

“[We need to close it] to make sure that we’re also living up to our values and our ideals and our principles. And that’s what closing Guantánamo is about — not because I think that the people who are running Guantánamo are doing a bad job, but rather because it’s become a symbol,” Obama said in a Dec. 22 news conference.

He failed to specify what Guantánamo might symbolize. It is fair to assume President Obama was referring to widespread allegations of torture and human rights abuse that take place in Guantánamo and U.S. facilities all over the world.

Deghayes shared horrid details of his treatment at the hand of U.S. prison guards. He lost vision in one eye in a beating and had his nose, finger and ribs broken in other instances of abuse. “There were physical beatings, interrogations, chains…we were not allowed to speak to anyone for days and months,” he said.

He also said other cases were worse than his. “Some died under torture, some were sexually abused, they were raped.”

Chakraborty said that Guantánamo’s closing would not spell an end to torture and abuses because there is an unknown number of overseas and secret U.S. interrogation and detention facilities. But she called closing Guantánamo “one very important first step,” adding that it would “show we have the kind good political will to ensure justice for detainees.”

Currently, Deghayes works with lawyers and activists to fight for accountability. “We want help from lawyers in the United States to bring cases [to trial] and help accountability…not just damages to rebuild shattered lives of [former prisoners],” he said.

Next month, the Berkeley City Council will vote on a resolution to welcome Guantánamo detainees who have been released and cleared as not posing a threat. Many such detainees have no country to be released to because of political circumstances. So far, the United States has refused to let these former detainees live in the United States and so a vote in favor of the resolution would have only symbolic value.

Hot sexy events January 26 – February 1

0

Glory be OneTaste. This SF-based company is devoted to the singular pursuit of female pleasure, offering lessons in their “slow sex” technique, detailed re-programming of one’s touch-stroke-lick that all but guarantees that at-times elusive female orgasm. Believe it. Fitness-business guru-crazy Tim Ferriss describes a class with OneTaste in his new book The 4-Hour Body as being highly informative and bewilderingly hands-on. He also likens the female genitalia to an Imperial Guard from Star Wars, but that is besides the point (kind of). At any rate, OneTaste is conducting a one-off course at the Polk Street Good Vibrations this week on discovering your deepest desires (Mon/31), making it but one of the can’t-miss sex events on offer out there in pervertlandia. Enjoy, kids!


Bare Chest Calendar semi-finals

For 28 years, iron-chested menfolk have bravely paraded their bulging pectorals about for a good cause – the Bare Chest Calendar, which raises money for the AIDS Emergency Fund and Positive Resources Center. You can nobly help in the effort, just attend the semi-final and final rounds of the contest that will determine next year’s calendar boys and cheer your ass off. By the looks of the contenders, that shouldn’t be too difficult.

Thurs/27 9:30 p.m., 

Powerhouse

1347 Folsom, SF

www.barechest.org


Transgender HIV/STI testing 

Sure, it happens every week, but that’s no reason not to give St. James’ Infirmary a shout-out over their excellent, sensitive testing and trans-hormone-knowledgeable services that are available each Thursday afternoon. With all the scary cuts in the area as of late (see event Sun/30), it’s good to know that there are still safe, friendly places to go to stay healthy, happy, and sexy.

Thurs/27 1 – 4 p.m., free

St. James’ Infirmary

1372 Mission, SF

(415) 554-9634

www.stjamesinfirmary.org

email sjimedical@yahoo.com for appointment


Boots

Chaps is putting the call out for boot pigs, so oink oink Wilbur – grease up your city Stompers and cruise to Folsom Street. There’s nothing sexier for a leatherman than the threat of getting crushed under the stampede of hairy-chested hotties that will be thrusting out their steel toes for a buff by bootblack Miss V. The Stompers gang hosts and who’s that behind the bar? The sexy David, that’s who.

Sat/29 9 p.m. – 2 a.m., free

Chaps 

1225 Folsom, SF

(415) 255-2427

www.chapsbarsanfrancisco.com


Hotties 4 H0m0 Health Care: A Fundraiser for Lyon-Martin Health Services 

Not cool. There’s not enough clinics in this city-state-universe that cater to queer women and transgendered folk, and one of the finest, Lyon-Martin Health Services, is facing closure due to serious financial problems. How much do they need to keep their doors open? Try $250,000 – which sounds like a lot, but given all the hullabaloo the community is raising to keep the place afloat, it’s totally doable. Here’s one way to support the clinic: shaking your ass to DJ Bootie Klap and wriggling in time to performances by burlesque star Dottie Lux and friends. (Here’s some other ways, too!)

Sun/30 7-10 p.m., $5-20 sliding scale

El Rio 

3158 Mission, SF

(415) 282-3325

Facebook: Hotties for H0m0 Health Care


Eclipse

Hey ladies, Ms. Cat (leather community stalwart and 2010 Ms. Leather runner-up) is celebrating her birthday and she needs  you to reel back that hand and give her a good day-of-birth spanking. The Citadel’s female-only BDSM party, Eclipse, is back in action, which means you should pack up your toys, friends, or just come solo and open to this dungeon time-party time. 

Sat/29 8 p.m. – 1 a.m., $25 members only

SF Citadel

1277 Mission, SF

(415) 626-2746

www.sfcitadel.org


The Depths of Desire 

Secret longings are all well and good, as long as the longers themselves know what they are. Local sex education group OneTaste (famed for the dissection of the female orgasm) breaks down what one can do to get at one’s deepest longings and sassiest salaciousness.  

Mon/31 6 – 8 p.m., $20-25

Good Vibrations 

1620 Polk, SF

(415) 345-0500

www.goodvibes.com

 

Getting free

3

rebeccab@sfbg.com

Shane Bauer and Josh Fattal have been held captive in Evin Prison in Tehran for more than 540 days, and their friends and supporters in the Bay Area have been mounting an extraordinary campaign pushing for their release.

On July 31, 2009, Bauer and Fattal were hiking with Sarah Shourd, who is Bauer’s fiancée, through green mountains in Iraqi Kurdistan. The three UC Berkeley graduates had traveled from Damascus for a recreational visit. They were wandering nearby Ahmed Awa, a popular tourist destination where hundreds of people had flocked to camp, to visit a waterfall and enjoy the peace and quiet of the mountains.

They say they didn’t realize how close they were to Iran, which has no diplomatic ties to the United States.

Shourd told the Guardian she’s not sure whether they accidentally traversed the Iranian border, because it was unmarked. “We had no intention of being anywhere near Iran,” she said. “And if we were, we’re very sorry.”

Iranian officials surrounded them, speaking in Farsi, which they couldn’t understand. They were arrested on suspicion of spying and taken into custody. Before being taken to prison, one phoned a friend, Shon MeckFessel — who had been traveling with them but opted not to go on the hike because he wasn’t feeling well — to alert him that something had gone wrong. That would be the last communication any of them would have with close friends or family members for months.

Shourd was finally released on bail Sept. 14, 2010 on humanitarian grounds after spending 410 days in solitary confinement. She was reunited with family and friends — but Bauer and Fattal have remained in detainment ever since.

Since returning to the United States, Shourd has thrown her energy into advocating for their release — and she’s not alone. “Everyone in the family has been working tirelessly for all 18 months,” she said, “which is far, far longer than we ever imagined in our worst nightmares.”

 

FIGHTING FOR FREEDOM

While Shourd was still in prison, her mother, Nora, gave up her home and job to move in with Bauer’s mother, Cindy Hickey, and work for their release full-time. Fattal’s older brother, Alex, suspended his graduate studies at Harvard to dedicate himself to the campaign. His mother, Laura Fattal, stopped working to devote herself to the campaign.

“That’s just family alone,” Shourd noted. “If you start to look to how many people have contributed to our campaign and how many ways, it just blows your mind.” Soon after her release, Shourd put out a call for people to hang banners proclaiming the innocence of Bauer and Fattal and calling for their release. In response, nearly 60 banners were unfurled in 25 different countries.

Shourd has made countless media appearances since her release, and even put out an MP3 of a song she composed while in solitary confinement, which can be downloaded as a way to support the Free the Hikers campaign. Their story has drawn the interest of prominent figures. On Jan. 19, Noam Chomsky released a video offering to testify on their behalf if a trial is held, saying Bauer and Fattal “have dedicated themselves to advocating for social and environmental justice in Africa and elsewhere, and they truly embody the spirit of humanitarianism.”

Others who have publicly defended the trio include President Barack Obama, who issued a statement in July saying none of the hikers ever worked for the U.S. government, addressing Iranian accusations that they were there to commit espionage. United Nations Secretary General Ban Ki-Moon and the Archbishop Desmond Tutu have called for their release. A documentary has been produced about their plight, and a second one is in the works.

In San Francisco, artists and musicians have responded in droves to a call for support. An art auction that will benefit the campaign is planned for Jan. 29, featuring the work of more than 80 artists, plus live musical performances. As a nod toward Bauer’s work in photojournalism, the event will emphasize photography, and notables such as Mimi Chakrova, Taj Forer, Roberto Bear Guerra, Ken Light, the LUCEO Photo Collective, Susan Meiselas, Lianne Milton, Mark Murrmann, Alec Soth, and others have donated work. Among the artists who donated pieces are Marianne Bland, Mark Brecke, Teresa Camozzi, Andreina Davila, Eric Drooker, and former Board of Supervisors President Matt Gonzalez.

In early February, a music benefit will be held at the Bottom of the Hill to benefit the campaign. Titled “They Sing These Songs In Prison,” the event will feature performances of The Nightwatchman — that’s Tom Morello of Rage Against the Machine — plus Jolie Holland, accordionist Jason Webley, and Ryan Harvey & Lia Rose.

“The funding is to support the campaign to free Shane and Josh, and it goes to a wide array of needs that we have, like translation into Farsi, travel for media, and meeting with some various embassies and governments that are involved in advocating for Shane and Josh’s release,” Shourd explained. “Also, some of the money will probably go toward legal fees, and website fees, and materials for the campaign from flyers to business cards to t-shirts.”

 

WHO ARE THE HIKERS?

The campaign to advocate for their release has been tagged Free the Hikers, but the identities of the three young people (Bauer and Fattal are both 28, Shourd is 32) go much deeper than that. They’re social-justice advocates, antiwar activists, writers, environmentalists, travelers, and creative thinkers with deep ties to the Bay Area.

Shourd, who lives in Oakland, was teaching English to Iraqi refugees when she was in Syria, as well as practicing some journalism. Fattal, who taught at Aprovecho — an education center in Oregon focused on sustainability and permaculture — had been traveling to India, South Africa, and other places through the International Honors Program to lead workshops on health and sustainable technology before visiting his friends in Syria.

“Josh is an environmentalist, he’s a teacher, he’s an incredible, incredible, generous and selfless man,” Shourd said. “As soon as you meet him, you feel what an extraordinary and unique human being he is. I was friends with him for years before he came to visit us in Damascus, and he decided to travel with us to Northern Iraq to Iraqi Kurdistan to learn about Kurdish culture, to see another diverse aspect of the Middle East.”

Bauer wrote for publications such as The Nation, Mother Jones, and the Christian Science Monitor. A photojournalist who has won multiple awards and had his work published internationally, Bauer has documented everything from tenant conditions in San Francisco SROs to conflict-ridden regions in Africa and the Middle East. Bauer also wrote an article for the Guardian about an Oakland residence that is famous among East Bay anarchists (See “Hellarity burns,” May 27, 2008).

“Shane has an incredible passion for pursuing truth and complicating our ideas about other parts of the world, about conflicts around the world and at home,” Shourd noted. She added that many of his stories serve to highlight “some of the very specific ways that the U.S. presence in Iraq has taken a toll on innocent people.”

Before their ill-fated excursion, Shourd said she’d heard from multiple westerners and her Arabic tutor that Iraqi Kurdistan was a safe and enjoyable place to visit. “It’s often referred to as ‘the other Iraq’ because it’s a semiautonomous region designated as a no-fly zone by the U.S. government,” she explained. “It’s actually a part of the Middle East that has a very positive fingerprint from the U.S. government because they helped protect the Kurdish people from Saddam Hussein. So Northern Iraq is not a dangerous place for Americans or westerners to go, and no American has ever been killed in Northern Iraq, which is just phenomenal after a decade of war and occupation.”

She said Bauer, Fattal, and MeckFessel were all enthusiastic about the trip, and after researching it online, the four felt they had enough information to travel there. “We ordered a special Lonely Planet guide of Northern Iraq, and a friend of ours who went a month before we did borrowed it and lost it, so we didn’t have the Lonely Planet guide,” she noted. “But we still felt we had enough information about it to travel there and really believed we had nothing to fear.”

 

SOLITARY

Shourd credits her fiancé and her friend with helping her through “every minute of prison,” even though she was alone in her cell for 23 hours a day. At first she wasn’t allowed to see them at all, but after some time had passed, guards allowed her to visit with them in an outdoor courtyard for 30 minutes a day. Later, that brief time together was increased to an hour.

“There’s no way I could have maintained hope and maintained my own sanity and the strength that it took to get through every day of isolation and depravity and uncertainty and fear,” she said. “The emotional strength that that took, and the discipline that it took, really Shane and Josh and I all created together in the little time that we had, through the unconditional support and love we had for each other.”

Since they didn’t speak Farsi and the guards spoke very little English, it was difficult to communicate basic needs, and Shourd described the experience as being surrounded by hostility.

“Whenever I just started to slip away mentally, Shane and Josh would bring me back, and the knowledge that they were going to be there for me was the only thing that got me through 410 days of solitary confinement,” she said. The three thought up activities to give themselves something to look forward to, like marking time with small courtyard celebrations and special food they saved to share together or discussing topics in an organized format. “We had almost like a curriculum that we followed of study, and sort of intellectual exploration,” she explained.

They were only allowed to have pens for one month — that was the easiest month, Shourd said. But the rest of the time, even though they weren’t permitted to write things down, they were allowed to read. “Books were our lifeline. We read the same books in concert, we took turns reading books and passed them back and forth when we saw each other in the courtyard. And we would memorize dates and memorize poetry and recite poetry to each other and test each other on dates,” Shourd said.

“Josh would give me math problems to do in my head because he knew I was trying to get better with algebra. We had a dictionary that we passed back and forth, and we would make stories from words in the dictionary and tell each other these really intricate fantastical stories that we came up with. Anything to keep your mind busy.”

Beginning in her second month in prison, Shourd also passed the time by composing songs. A month went by before she was able to share the first one with Bauer and Fattal, but when she did finally sing it for them, they learned the words and sang it with her. “When we were together in the outdoor courtyard, they would just tell me to sing louder,” Shourd said. “I know they’re singing those songs now.”

The intellectual drills, storytelling, math problems, and singing weren’t merely a remedy for boredom. “You have to really keep your mind strong and busy so that you don’t get sort of swallowed up by the abyss of fear and loneliness that encroaches on you day by day in that kind of situation,” she said.

 

LOOKING AHEAD

Despite the time, energy, and effort spent on the campaign to free all three, no one can say for sure just when Bauer and Fattal will finally be reunited with family and friends. In November, Iranian authorities said that a trial previously scheduled for that month had been postponed, but the Free the Hikers campaign is calling for them to be released without a trial.

“They don’t deserve to be there one minute longer than I was, and they never deserved to be there in the first place,” Shourd said. “They should be shown the same kind of humanitarianism that they have put into action in their lives, through their work.”

Amnesty International is among many of the groups that have called for the Iranian government to release the two young men. “One year after their arrest, the Iranian authorities’ failure to charge them with illegal entry into Iran or more serious charges, such as espionage, has fueled speculation that the Iranian authorities are holding them as a bargaining chip,” notes a statement released July 2010 by Amnesty International, an international human rights organization.

Meanwhile, Shourd has been contemplating what her experience would have been like if the U.S. and Iran actually maintained diplomatic ties, and she published an opinion piece on CNN International calling for greater communication between the governments.

“I think it’s their responsibility to their people to do that, and I think it’s a tragedy that there’s been 30 years of practically no relationship between Iran and the U.S.,” Shourd said. “It’s a tragedy for countless Iranian Americans in this country who have a hard time visiting their relatives in Iran, sending them money, even just getting information about them or visiting their homeland.”

She began her opinion piece by recounting the time that a prison guard brought her freshly picked roses, an uncommon gesture of kindness during her incarceration. “In the worst of circumstances, the most extraordinary acts of human kindness emerge,” she told the Guardian. “They were rare. The vast majority of my experience was empty and desolate. But the times that the guards were kind to me … will stay with me for the rest of my life.” *

ART AUCTION TO FREE ALL THREE

Saturday, Jan. 29, 7 p.m.

SomArts Cultural Center

934 Brannan, SF

Musical performances by The Ferocious Few, Devon McClive and Sons, Grant Hazard and Lorin Station

www.artforssj.tumblr.com/#about

THEY SING THESE SONGS IN PRISON

Featuring The Nighwatchman, Jolie Holland, Jason Webley, Ryan Harvey & Lia Rose

Thursday, Feb. 10, 8:30 p.m., $12–$18

Bottom of the Hill

1233 17 St., SF

www.bottomofthehill.com

To learn more, visit www.freethehikers.org, www.freeourfriends.eu

Derailment

0

le.chicken.farmer@gmail.com

CHEAP EATS The last thing I did before I left San Francisco, I promised Earl Butter that this time I would not kiss any gangsters on the train. I didn’t say anything about self-proclaimed hillbillies who burp a lot and don’t have front teeth — or luggage — so you wonder if they just escaped from prison or are only on parole.

This one, he flirted with me all the way from Emeryville to Chicago. That’s a long way to not kiss someone!

He was going on to Detroit and had less of a layover than me, but helped nevertheless with my luggage, which was considerable. He wanted to help more, but when he went outside to smoke, I stuffed my stuff in a locker, stepped out into the Windy City, and promptly got my nails done. Which was one of the best decisions I ever made.

One of the worst was early next morning when I stepped off the train into a frozen shit town not unlike, or far from, the frozen shit town where I was born. Did you hear me scream? Henceforth, when East Coast people in California say that they miss the seasons, I will put lettuce in their ears and flick them on the forehead.

Probably, to the residents of Erie, Penn., this snow was a non-event. But to an overtired, underdressed California girl without boots, it was the Big One, blizzardwise. To his credit, the snot-nosed station master did ask, before locking me out of the station, if I needed a ride.

“My friend is coming,” I said.

“Can I drop you somewhere?” he said. “Where are you going?”

“New York.”

He laughed at my apparent joke, pointed to where the Post Office was, in case I needed it, and left. In retrospect, I would have licked that booger off his upper lip for a ride to New York. Instead, I stood in the blowing snow and freezing cold, stomping my feet and, yeah, screaming, until the Post Office opened. Then I stood in there.

Probably I should have stayed on the train. I could have stayed on the train. It was going very close to where I wanted to get, but I’d thought I would keep my old ex-bandmate and good friend Rube Roy company on his way there and eat in diners for a day, instead of dining cars.

Rube Roy was two hours late and partially blind in one eye, but did buy me breakfast. On our way out of town we found a diner called Somebody’s “Dinor,” where, over eggs and potatoes and sausage and coffee and such, we talked about the old times, and the new times, and even some of the upcoming times.

There is so much time. So much time to think, in a car spinning around and around on a snowy interstate highway in Pennsylvania, bouncing between guardrails like a complicated bank shot off the cue of someone named Chuck or Lefty.

One of the things I thought about, boom, spin, was how I didn’t think I was going to die, but you never know, bang, spin. I never did like merry-go-rounds, or whirligigs, but the bumper cars I guess were all right. Now, I get motion sickness facing backward on BART. I didn’t think we were going to die, but when our car came to rest finally, facing traffic in the passing lane, I don’t know. I wondered.

Before I go, I would like to spell Papi’s name right, at least once, in the paper. They didn’t exact any promises from me, but Papi, Papa, and Coach did want one last dinner together before I left. So I said, “Brothers! Korean barbecue!”

And, like magic, that was where we went. For meat and meat for me and Papa, and some other kinds of things for the vegetarians. Ah, you know, it was all pretty good and everything, but not as probably good as the last time I went. Does it matter?

Not here.

“Rube Roy?” I said, as a semitruck whizzed by in the right lane. “Can I drive now?”

He flashed his headlights at the next one and said, “No.”

I write to you from New York City. Hi. Next time, I promise you, dear reader, dear gangsters, dear hillbilly, I will stay on the train. 

BROTHERS RESTAURANT

Daily 11 a.m.–midnight

4128 Geary, SF

(415) 387-7991

AE/D/MC/V

Beer and wine

Alerts

0

alert@sfbg.com

WEDNESDAY, JAN. 26

Free clinics aren’t free

Nothing like eating and drinking for a cause. To help raise needed funds for the Berkeley Free Clinic, Saturn Cafe will donate 10 percent of your bill to this worthy endeavor.

10 a.m.–midnight, cost of food and drink purchase

Saturn Cafe

2175 Allston, Berk.

pccbfc@gmail.com

FRIDAY, JAN. 28

 

UNIFEM fundraiser

The United Nations Development Fund for Women is holding a fundraiser for Ninel Babcinschi, a lawyer and advocate for trafficked women in Moldova whose life has been threatened because of her work defending these women. The fundraiser includes an informative lecture and a film screening.

6:30–9:30 p.m., $15 Artists Television Access

992 Valencia, SF www.atasite.org

 

Rally for Guy Jarreau

Attend a rally demanding a full investigation into the shooting by Vallejo police that resulted in the death of Guy Jarreau, a student and active community member. The Dec. 11 shooting of Jarreau, an unarmed black man, is said to be having a “Mehserle effect” on the community because of its parallels to the Oscar Grant shooting.

1–3 p.m., free Solano County District Attorney’s Office

321 Tuolumne, Vallejo www.northbayuprising.blogspot.com

 

SATURDAY, JAN. 29

Seattle Solidarity Network discussion

SeaSol, a support group for rights for workers and tenants, holds a discussion about the importance of building solidarity networks and small-scale collective action. Add your two cents to the debate and learn how you may not be getting all that you are entitled to as a worker or tenant.

7–9:00 p.m., free

Station 40

3030B 16th St., SF

www.seattlesolidarity.net

 

Go, Caltrain

Join the discussion on how to increase Caltrain ridership, improve service, and create sustainable funding. The event offers speakers, panels and workshops. Featured speakers include Sierra Club Executive Director Michael Brune, SF Sup. Sean Elsbernd, and others.

9:00 a.m.–2:30 p.m.

Registration begins at 8:30 a.m., free (RSVP required)

SamTrans Auditorium

1250 San Carlos, San Carlos

www.greencaltrain.com/summit

 

SUNDAY, JAN. 30

Fred Korematzu Day celebration

In December 2010, California signed a bill into law declaring Jan. 30 the first day in U.S. history named after an Asian American. Honor national civil rights hero and Oakland native Fred Korematzu in at the country’s first Korematzu Day celebration. There will be a reception and film screening, as well as spoken word performance by artist Beau Shea and a keynote speech by the Rev. Jesse Jackson.

1- 5 p.m., $15-100

Wheeler Hall

101 Zellerbach Hall #4800

UC Berkeley, Berk.

(415)882-4673

 

MONDAY, FEB. 1

Book Club: Trotsky discussion

Read and discuss Leon Trotsky’s History of the Russian Revolution Vol. 1, the Bolshevik revolutionary’s classic book that tells the story of how poor and working class people combined efforts to start the first socialist revolution in history. An optional light supper will be provided.

1–5 p.m., $2/6 donation

625 Larkin, SF

www.socialism.com/sanfrancisco

(415) 864-1278

 

Mail items for Alerts to the Guardian Building, 135 Mississippi St., SF, CA 94107; fax to (415) 437-3658; or e-mail alert@sfbg.com. Please include a contact telephone number. Items must be received at least one week prior to the publication date.

5 best, most deeply embarrassing ways to find a date

0

They say that internet dating thing really works — especially if you’re a white male. But in the rush to OkCupid our lonely nights away, we may have missed a step. If you’re going for the artificially-constructed meet-and-greet, you may as well do it in person, right? Maximum awkwardness! That’s what the slew of alterna-dating events that are giggling and cautiously offering to buy you a drink this VD season are promising (no glove no love!). Below, five of the hipper – bikes! books! –options for those looking to be paired off before this warm snap ends and we all go back to our dens.

 

Literary Speed Dating

Finally, the library is doing something about your romantic travails! The public institution is freeing up from its mission to educate and entertain to host this book lover’s mix-and-mingle speed round. Singles in their twenties and thirties will get four to five minutes to biblio-chat about their fave bindings – books they hated, loved, or wanna bring up as a conversational flashpoint. 

Straight dates: Tues/1 5:45 – 7:45 p.m., free

LGBTQ dates: Weds/2 5:45 – 7:45 p.m., free

Pre-registration suggested

Main Library 

100 Larkin, SF

(415) 557-4400

www.sfpl.org


Love on Wheels Dating Game

Here’s an idea! Let’s pack new it-spot Public Works, put a curtain up and have singles ask each other prying questions regarding their transportational decisions in the search for love! Maybe the exhibitionism of the SF Bike Coalition’s Love on Wheels meat market-fundraiser isn’t for everybody. But it is for somebodies, and you may find love amongst the common folk audience members if you roll over to voyeur. Just hurry up if you wanna play the game, whydontcha – spots for straighties are already booked up and same sex cyclers should apply with the quickness to get on stage.

Weds/9 7 p.m., $5 for SF Bike Coalition members, $10 non-members

Public Works

161 Erie, SF

www.sfbike.org


Cupid’s Back

Because the pursuit of love is noble enough, but when you slap a healthy amount of fundraising for the queer historical society on top of your noble, your tail chase turns downright saintly! Such is this canonizing evening at Trigger, wherein those looking for someone to hold onto are pinned with a single bleeding heart with which to call upon Cupid’s help to locate love among boosters of the GLBT Historical Society. Open bar, gay community see-and-be-seen – this may just be the spot to find your new sweetie.

Fri/11 8 p.m. – midnight, $35-40

Trigger

2344 Market, SF

www.glbthistory.com


Singled Out on BART

Tie a ribbon around your ring finger (blue for menfolk, pink for womenfolk) and shoulder your messenger bag – you’re going hunting on BART today. Instead of subsisting completely on your interpretation of the odd sidelong glance, today there is an organized campaign to indicate one’s willingness to chat up a stranger on the Hallmark holiday. 

Mon/14 6 a.m. – 10 p.m., free

Bay Area BART trains

Facebook: Singled Out on BART


Queer Speed Dating

Well, Valentine’s Day has passed and what’s-his-name turned out to chew with his mouth open, so damn. Nonetheless, you have one more chance at finding love amongst the randoms. The Queer Love Connection is hosting this event as a fundraiser for Community United Against Violence, presenting a talk on “The Nueroscience of Love,” plus free food and drinks, and your chance to meet 10 different cute little things. There’s an “after-mingle” session too, so if you’re not down for a game of musical chairs come late. 

Sat/19 8 – 4 p.m., $20

Il Pirata

2007 16th St., SF

(415) 626-2626

www.cuav.org

 

Why is Guantánamo Bay still open?

5

Amnesty International reminds us that despite President Obama’s promise two years ago to shut down the Guantánamo Bay detention center, it remains open. The activist organization will hold a panel discussion on torture and human rights tomorrow (Wed/26), which is the second anniversary of his promise.

The event is free and open to the public will take place at 7:30 p.m. at 2050 Valley Life Sciences Building on the UC Berkeley Campus. The panel will provide detailed summary of human rights crimes that continue to take place at the detention center. Among the panelists participating is former Guantánamo detainee Omar Deghayes, who has never been charged with or convicted by the United States. (Asaf Shalev)

Huge demand as Burning Man tickets go on sale

3

Burning Man 2011 got off to a big start yesterday as tickets went on sale, demonstrating that the 25-year-old event is more popular than ever. The demand for tickets at 10 a.m. was so strong that it crashed the servers for almost two hours, overcoming efforts to beef up a ticketing system that has functioned pretty well the last two years after being a frustrating hassle in previous years.

“People were happy with [the event] last year or they wouldn’t have pounded the servers trying to get a ticket,” Marian Goodell, the event’s communications director, told us. “The ticketing system had been tested pretty extensively, but the sudden demand for service was high that the ticket vendor had ever heard of before.”

More than 20,000 people snapped up tickets in the first 24 hours, outpacing last year and selling out the 9,000 tickets each at the first two tiers of $210 and $240. Goodell said that as many as 40,000 users appeared to be trying to log on yesterday, with many apparently not willing to endure a wait time of about six hours in some cases. Once the current tier of $280 tickets is gone, the price will be $320 until the event.

Last year, the population of Black Rock City – the temporary city that Burning Man attendees build in rural Nevada every August – peaked at more than 51,000 people on Friday night. Goodell wouldn’t make a prediction about this year’s population, noting that spring ticket sales are hard to predict, but she noted that many of the event’s marquee artists, such as Peter Hudson and Sean Orlando, are planning ambitious projects for this year that are already generating excitement.

“We’re very excited about this year,” she said.

For more on Burning Man and its myriad subcultures, you can find my past Guardian articles on the culture here or look for my upcoming book, The Tribes of Burning Man: How an Experimental City in the Desert is Shaping the New American Counterculture, being released next month by CCC Publishing.

Our Weekly Picks: January 19-25

0

WEDNESDAY 19

EVENT

“20 Under 40: Stories from The New Yorker”

Leave it to The New Yorker to pull out a short story series of “young fiction writers who we will believe are, or will be, key to their generation” who makes good on the promise. The 20 Under 40 class of 1999 featured Junot Díaz, Jhumpa Lahiri, and Jonathan Franzen — before the three had soared to the forefront of modern literature. This year’s edition has now been anthologized after being run story by story in the magazine. This event at City Lights gives Left Coasters a chance to thrill to readings by the collection’s exciting West Coast names: Chris Adrian, Daniel Alarcón, and Yiyun Li. (Caitlin Donohue)

7 p.m., free

City Lights Bookstore

261 Columbus, SF

(415) 362-4921

www.citylights.com

 

EVENT

“Nerd Nite”

Last year’s megahit The Social Network proved that nerds are now totally mainstream (see also: Mark “Person of the Year” Zuckerberg’s face taking up the entire cover of Time magazine). Geeks are golden (literally — Zuck’s worth like $7 billion), so there’s no shame in hitting up “Nerd Nite,” the monthly gathering for those who enjoy celebrating the cerebral (also, drinking; it’s at a bar, after all). As you might suspect, January’s edition goes way beyond center parts and suspenders; featured smarty-pants include an engineer heading up an open-source team competing for a $30 mil prize offered by Google to anyone who can fund, build, and land a robot on the Moon (what, like it’s hard?) and an actual (necro)neuroscientist speaking on “Scanning the Zombie Brain.” Brains: trendy, and delicious! (Cheryl Eddy)

7:30 p.m., $8

Rickshaw Stop

155 Fell, SF

www.rickshawstop.com

 

THURSDAY 20

MUSIC

Tobacco

Dusting off the confetti and party debris that usually accompanies Black Moth Super Rainbow’s performances, Tobacco breaks from his so-called side project to take matters into his own smokin’ hot meat hooks and show off last year’s Maniac Meat and his freshest slab of sound, La Uti EP. It’s all bewitching stuff, even without the motor-mouthed rap by Aesop Rock that graced Tobacco’s debut Fucked Up Friends. These days matters are less manic though plenty witchy (“Fresh Hex,” featuring Beck) with beats that land as heavily as heck (“Sweatmother”). Hex, if the Butthole Surfers can luck into a hit, who’s to say that the Pittsburgh music meister won’t have the kids singing along to “Motorlicker” or “Lamborghini Meltdown” sometime soon? (Kimberly Chun)

With Seventeen Evergreen and Odd Nosdam

10 p.m., $13–$16

New Parish

579 18th St., Oakl.

www.thenewparish.com

 

PERFORMANCE

Raw-Dios

Sing it, Roots (from the group’s song “Rising Up”): “Yesterday I saw a B-girl crying/ She told me that the radio’s been playing the same song all day long.” Clear Channel now owns 10 percent of all radio stations in this country, 776,000 advertising displays, and 200 major concert venues. Small wonder the truth is hard to come by. But this stage production, starring veterans of the Teatro Campesino activist theater and the spoken word scene, finds hope: the based-on-truth story of a raunchy morning show DJ that flips the corporate script when the U.S. starts bombing Iraq in 2003. A play to hope to … (Donohue)

Thurs/20-Sat/22, 8 p.m., $16

Mission Cultural Center for Latino Arts

2868 Mission, SF

(415) 643-2785

www.missionculturalcenter.org

 

THEATER

Bone to Pick and Diadem

Cutting Ball Theater presents a reimagining of the myth of Ariadne, Theseus, and the Minotaur. Bone to Pick premiered in 2008 to critical acclaim, and now returns with its sequel, Diadem. Bone to Pick begins with Ariadne as a waitress in a diner — 3,000 years after being left on the island of Naxos, which now happens to be a deserted U.S. Army base. Diadem flashes back to the day Ariadne was left on Naxos by Theseus. Written by Eugenie Chan and directed by Rob Melrose, Greek mythology takes a new twist in this postmodern explanation of love, war, and complicity. (Emmaly Wiederholt)

Through Feb. 13

Thurs.–Sat., 8 p.m.; Sun., 5 p.m., $15–$50

Exit on Taylor

277 Taylor, SF

(415) 419-3584

www.cuttingball.com

 

FILM/COMEDY

“RiffTrax Presents Night of the Shorts”

In the tradition of Mystery Science Theater 3000, RiffTrax can help turn even the lamest piece of cinematic garbage into worthwhile viewing. Selling audio commentaries through its website meant to be played in sync with various current or justifiably forgotten films, the RiffTrax team wastes no opportunity to exploit plot holes or bash lame special effects and embarrassingly awful acting. As part of the SF Sketchfest, Kevin Murphy and Bill Corbett, two of the company’s founding members and former MST3000 writers, will be ripping apart PSAs and training and safety shorts alongside comedians such as Maria Bamford, Paul F. Tomkins, and Adam Savage. (Landon Moblad)

9:30 p.m., $25

Castro Theatre

429 Castro, SF

www.sfsketchfest.com

 

FRIDAY 21

MUSIC

Witchburn

Jamie Nova’s voice takes no prisoners. Bluesy and deep, gritty and unfaltering — think, “Black Velvet, If You Please” but without all the drama. It makes sense considering her years of practice in her other endeavor, the AC/DC tribute band Hells Belles, as Bon Scott-Brian Johnson. In the Seattle-based Witchburn, Nova’s strong vocals are a quintessential match for straightforward rock. Guitarist Mischa Kianne, who’s been hammering away metal riffs since junior high, is her six-string equivalent. With a debut album produced by Jack Endino, the man behind seemingly every good band from Nirvana to High on Fire, Witchburn is rock incarnate. (Kat Renz)

With Sassy!!! and Diemond

9 p.m., $5

El Rio

3158 Mission, SF

(415) 282-3325

www.elriosf.com FILM

 

FILM

Two in the Wave and “Bringing Up Léaud: The Antoine Doinel Cycle”

Emmanuel Laurent chronicles the hugely influential French nouvelle vague through the lives of its flagship auteurs in Two in the Wave. Raised in hardscrabble poverty, Francois Truffaut made films that reflected an increasingly sentimental yearning for the middle class. Jean-Luc Godard was raised in Swiss bourgeois comfort — yet he gravitated toward a Marxist proletarianism perversely avant-garde in the extreme. Both shared (and fought over) onscreen muse Jean-Pierre Léaud, plucked from Parisian streets to star in Truffaut’s 1959 The 400 Blows. One might reasonably conclude from evidence here that Truffaut, dead from a brain tumor in 1984, was the greater artist — or at least humanitarian. Yet coldly intellectual, ever-more-bilious Godard continues into his 80s, last year’s abstract Film Socialisme restoring him to rarefied critical if not popular favor. This dual portrait reaches an ingratiating zenith toward its end, when we see surviving interviewee Léaud growing up onscreen, anxious to please twin mentors. The Roxie’s weeklong showcase is double-billed with all five films in which the actor played Truffaut alter ego Antoine Doinel, from Blows to 1979’s Love on the Run. (Dennis Harvey)

Jan. 21–27, $5–$9.75

Roxie

3117 16th St., SF

(415) 863-1087

www.roxie.com

 

SATURDAY 22

MUSIC

“Jersey Score”

It’s not enough that the Situation, Ronnie, and Vinny graced a certain New York alt weekly’s 2010 Queer Issue cover. It’s not enough that Snooki’s novel, A Shore Thing, could be read as an homage to Truman Capote’s Answered Prayers. (Sample line: “She could pour a shot of tequila down his belly and slurp it out of his navel without getting splashed in the face.”) Nor is it sufficient that the gay community has enough G.T.L. freaks — call them gaydos — to fill a million grenade-filled hot tubs. No, now we must celebrate Jersey Shore‘s beachy meatballs with a one-off party dedicated to “tanned-up muscle boys and fist-pumping homos that are D.T.F.” Exuberant promoter Joshua J.’s shindigs are equal parts irony and earnestness, which in this case basically equals frickle bombs no matter how you slice it. With creepin’ DJs Robert Jeffrey and Juan Garcia playing Pauly D classics. (Marke B.)

9 p.m., $5

UndergroundSF

424 Haight, SF

www.joshuajpresents.com

 

MUSIC

Juan MacLean DJ set

“The” Juan MacLean, club cornerstone of heralded New York City dance punk label DFA: that affiliation goes back to Six Finger Satellite, the band in which MacLean (at that time John) played guitar and future LCD Soundsystem mastermind James Murphy produced material and ear-drum destroying live setups. Since then MacLean has transitioned to creating steady dance grooves, where drums hit hard and fast atop a background of melancholy melodies, uncompressed and rarely distorted. His recent !K7 release, DJ-Kicks, is a straightforward ode to house music and was labeled the best compilation of last year by DJ Mag. (Ryan Prendiville)

With Conor and Vin Sol, and Jason Kendig

10 p.m., call for price

Public Works

161 Erie, SF

(415) 932-0955

www.publicsf.com

 

MUSIC

Fu Manchu

Sometimes, when I can’t get warm to save my life, I’ll bundle up, find a south-facing hillside full of sage and agave, and listen to Fu Manchu. I’ll forget I’m in San Francisco where I haven’t had tan legs in more than four years, reveling instead in that consummate blend of 1970s classic rock, 1980s SoCal punk, 1990s stoner metal, and skate-movie soundtrack sunshine. This is the band’s 20th anniversary tour, it’s playing two sets: one of its third album, “In Search of …” from an unprecedented start to finish, and the other with songs off its first two records. Opening band Santa Cruz’s Dusted Angel is worth being on time. (Renz)

With Dusted Angel

10 p.m., $12

Bottom of the Hill

1233 17th St., SF

(415) 621-4455

www.bottomofthehill.com

 

MONDAY 24

EVENT

“Porchlight”

This month at Porchlight, San Francisco’s “premiere storytelling series,” hosts Arline Klatte and Beth Lisick present “Giving It Up! Stories about Quitting, Stopping, Letting Go, and Never Coming.” Featured anecdotalists this month include up-and-coming comedian and “Lazy Sunday” counter clerk Emily Heller, and working-class weirdo Scott “Meatman” Vermiere, a self-admitted expert in hiding places whose nickname is absolutely not ironic. With an ever-changing cast of yarn-spinners, there’s no way of knowing where the 10-minute tales will go. But that’s the point. (Prendiville)

8 p.m., $15

Verdi Club

2424 Mariposa, SF

www.porchlightsf.com

 

The Guardian listings deadline is two weeks prior to our Wednesday publication date. To submit an item for consideration, please include the title of the event, a brief description of the event, date and time, venue name, street address (listing cross streets only isn’t sufficient), city, telephone number readers can call for more information, telephone number for media, and admission costs. Send information to Listings, the Guardian Building, 135 Mississippi St., SF, CA 94107; fax to (415) 487-2506; or e-mail (paste press release into e-mail body — no text attachments, please) to listings@sfbg.com. Digital photos may be submitted in jpeg format; the image must be at least 240 dpi and four inches by six inches in size. We regret we cannot accept listings over the phone.

Hot sexy events January 19-25

1

We’re normally asses up here at the weekly sex events column, but for the purpose of January 19-26, we’re asking you to lift another body part altogether: your pinky. That’s because tonight (Weds/19) you’ll get the chance to learn about an entirely refined BDSM social function, that being the tea party. Ms. Margaret, who used to coordinate educational services for the smOdyssey website as well as the  Folsom Fringe conference, runs the classy “Tea With a Twist” affair with long-time slave Erich. Rumor has it she never takes her tea the same way twice, for which you will learn the reason at this lace tablecloth-leather dress how-to affair.

 

Tea With a Twist

Why must all BDSM parties take place in a dungeon? What of the mistress that requires some amount of refinement and grace – not to mention finger food? These classy souls are invited to this primer on dom-sub tea time, sculpted by Ms. Margaret’s “velvet glove over steel hand” mentality. 

Weds/19 8 – 10 p.m., $15

Center for Sex and Culture

1519 Mission, SF

(415) 552-7399

www.sexandculture.org


Pits

Raise your hand if you’re an armpit man. (See how that works?) Chaps has got the jock-tastic bash for you this week. Pits is part of their fetish night series, so no longer will you be wondering if that hottie with the body holding the Jager bomb will mind if you want to grab him by the under-bicep. He’s here too, ya know – just be prepared to give as you get, gentlemen.

Weds/19 

Chaps 

1225 Folsom, SF

(415) 255-2427

www.chapsbarsanfrancisco.com


Radical Love Workshop

At some point in our lives, we’ve all wished we had this line on our resume: “revolutionary activist of the heart.” Sure you deserve it, sweets – but Wendy-O-Matic can say it with a straight face. Ms. O-Matic has spent years standing strong and educating on behalf of the polyamorous community, and now she’s presenting this workshop at Mission Control on the ins-and-outs of loving whoever you damn well please, and sharing them with whomsoever you see fit — with a basis on love and intimacy, not picking the right music for the orgy.

Thurs/20 7-9 p.m., $25 members only

Mission Control 

2519 Mission, SF

www.missioncontrolsf.org


Community Porn Forum

Skin flick performers get together to discuss the upcoming Cal OSHA meeting (the next is Feb/8) regarding occupational safety measures in the industry. The perfect chance, you XXXers, to learn about how you can tell the regulating body what you need to feel safe on the job – particularly regarding condom usage, a hot topic at recent meetings on the subject. MSM (male on male) performers especially encouraged to attend.

Fri/21 3 – 5 p.m., free

St. James’ Infirmary

1372 Mission, SF

(415) 554-8494

www.stjamesinfirmary.org


10th Annual Butch-Femme Holiday Party

Get all festive and feisty at this sexy winter ball. Of course, this being an all-lesbo affair, all manners of dress are welcome for the dancing and drinking – festive wear would be appropriate, but so too would be whatever ‘fits you wanna rock for the evening. Event organizers would be thrilled to death if volunteers want to bring finger food, refreshments, ice, or wood for the outdoor fire. Outdoor fire? Now we’re talking.

Sat/22 6 p.m. – midnight

Humanist Hall

411 28th St., Oakl.

www.erobay.com

email: butchfemmesocials@yahoogroups.com


Lip Service

Smack, suck, caress – and that’s just before the tongue gets activated. Kissing is one of those arts that can get passed over in pursuit of the all-powerful O, but it’s one of the most important (and public spaces friendly) weapon in your arsenal of sexual equanimity. Let sex educator Tracy Bartlett show you the ropes course to a good make-out sesh – grab your partner and get to mashin’.

Mon/24 6 – 8 p.m., $40-45/pair

Good Vibrations

1620 Polk, SF

(415) 345-0400

www.goodvibes.com

 

 

 

 

 

On the Cheap Listings

0

Events listings are compiled by Jackie Andrews. Submit items for the listings at listings@sfbg.com. For further information on how to submit items for the listings, see Weekly Picks.

WEDNESDAY 19

Tom Rachman Bookshop West Portal, 80 West Portal, SF; (415) 564-8080. 7p.m., free. Like books on tape, only better — Tom Rachman reads from his highly acclaimed debut novel The Imperfectionist, a collection of short stories set in and around an Italian English language newspaper for travelers and ex-pats. A journalist himself, Rachman’s writing has been described as alternately hilarious and heart-wrenching. Come see what all the hullabaloo is about.

THURSDAY 20

Pitchapalooza: American Idol for Books Booksmith, 1644 Haight, SF; (415) 863-8688, www.booksmith.com. 7:30pm, free. This American Idol-like event for writers unfortunately doesn’t feature a drunk and effed-up-on-pills Paula Abdul, but it could take you one step closer to becoming a published author. Pitch your book in one minute or less to an all star cast of publishing experts — the most convincing scribe gets an introduction to an agent that can help them realize their book dreams. Anyone who buys a book in the store that day gets a free consultation, making this a must-do for all you struggling artistes.Bay Area

Wild World of Frogs Randall Museum, 199 Museum Way, SF; (415)554-9600, www.randallmuseum.org. 7:30pm, free (donations encouraged). Dr. Jerry Kreiger, Save the Frogs! founder and director, will tell you everything you didn’t know you wanted to learn about frogs — from the interesting and funny to the downright sad (200 species of our skin breathing homies have become extinct over the last 30 years). Support the first and only public charity dedicated to amphibian conservation.

FRIDAY 21

Birds and Bees Collide Space Gallery, 1141 Polk, SF; (415)377-3325, www.birdlovesbee.com. 8pm, free. Celebrate the release of Birdlovesbee: Artists in Collaboration with writer Camille Ikalina Robles– founder of One Red Delicious Press — and a bevy of emerging artists. For Birdlovesbee, Robles passes her writing off to an artist who, in turn, creates a reaction in their chosen medium, resulting in beautiful, handmade zines. Collaborators include photographer Marie Dewitt and film artist Dennis Maxwell. Special musical performance by Silian Rail and DJ set by DJ Shortround.

SATURDAY 22

The Uncomfortable Zones of Fun Temescal Arts Center, 511 48th St., Oakl.; (510) 526-7858, www.temescalartscenter.org. 8pm, donations suggested. Prepare to get … uncomfortable. Frank Moore, shaman, disabled performance artist, and 2008 presidential candidate, merges music, dance, erotica, religion and improv to create an experience few people have an easy time describing.

Jewelry-making class The Bead Store, 417 Castro, SF; (415) 861-7332, www.thebeadstoresf.com. 11am-noon and 3-4pm, free (plus materials purchase). Tucked away on Castro Street amidst the countless bear bars and penis-shaped pasta peddlers lies a cozy little shop for all of your jewelry-making needs, including monthly classes. Perhaps you would like to recreate a piece of jewelry you once owned but lost after a night of too many Racer 5’s? You’ll want to attend the 11am “Bring Your Project” class. Stick around for the 3pm “Made with Love” class and make your sweetheart a heart-shaped pendant or earrings with materials provided by the shop. Call to reserve a spot because spaces are limited.

ChicaChic opening reception California Institute of Integral Studies, 1453 Mission, SF; (415) 575-6242, www.ciis.edu. 6-8 pm, free. Five leading chicana visual artists show their greatly varying work, which honors the themes and iconography of the Chicano civil rights movement of the 1960s and ’70s, yet at the same time provides new imagery for a newer and faster paced media-saturated society. Reception includes a panel discussion featuring the exhibition artists and curator.

SUNDAY 23

Cal Science and Engineering Festival UC Berkeley Sutardja Hall, Berk., (510) 642-0352, www.scienceatcal.berkeley.edu/festival. 11 am-3 pm, free. Cal drops the science from astronomy to zoology. Join the search for extraterrestrial intelligence, witness unicycle basketball, touch a real human brain, excavate fossils, make an earthquake, play silly animal games, and yes, there will be liquid nitrogen! Honorary UC Berkeley science degree not included.

TUESDAY 25

Delectable Delights: Tales of Food and Disaster Space Gallery, 1141 Polk, SF; (415) 377-3325, www.litupwriters.com. 7:30-9pm, free. LitUp Writers’ Humor Storytelling Series combines everyone’s favorite defense mechanism: humor, with everyone’s favorite coping mechanism: food. Sounds like a win-win right? Local writers perform, sharing funny stories about their obsessions with, or disgust for, the things we eat.

Alerts

0

alert@sfbg.com

WEDNESDAY, JAN. 19

 

Money and politics

Alex Gibney’s 2010 documentary Casino Jack: The United States of Money discusses the relationship between politics and money and how the almighty dollar is used to manipulate government decisions. The film uses the well known story of lobbyist Jack Abramoff to illustrate the greed, lies, and corruption in U.S. politics by following Abramoff’s money trail around the world.

7:30–9:30 p.m., $5 suggested

Humanist Hall

390 27th St., Berk.

(510)681-8699

 

March for Oscar Grant

Join the struggle for justice and reparations for the family of Oscar Grant, who was killed by a BART cop on New Year’s Eve 2009. Meet at the West Oakland BART station and march through the historic sites of Marcus Garvey and the Black Panther movement. A rally is planned for after the march.

Noon ( 2 p.m. rally), free

West Oakland BART station

1451 Seventh St., Oakl.

www.inpdum.org

THURSDAY, JAN. 20

 

Become a climate leader

Free training for anyone interested in providing climate change workshops. Receive the tools and materials to lead community members in calculating and reducing their carbon footprint and in creating positive change throughout their communities.

6:30–9 p.m. The Ecology Center

2530 San Pablo, Berk. www.ecologycenter.org/climatechange

SATURDAY, JAN. 22

 

Pro-choice parade

Celebrate and defend the 37th anniversary of Roe v. Wade. March through downtown and rally for the cause — which also happens to be a counter demonstration for the annual pro-life Walk for Life parade. Bring your signs, costumes, creativity, and SF pride.

11a.m.–1 p.m.

Harry Bridges Plaza (in front of the Ferry Building)

Market and Embarcadero, SF

www.bacorr.org

 

Commemorate the Triangle Fire

Help build and plan the March 2011 events for the 100th anniversary of the Triangle Shirtwaist Factory fire, the most disastrous industrial event in New York City history. The fire led to legislation requiring improved factory safety standards and helped spur the growth of the International Ladies Garment Workers Union.

11a.m.–1 p.m., free

City College of San Francisco, Mission campus

1125 Valencia, Room 277, SF

(415) 867-0628

 

Talking truth

Cambiz A. Khosravi’s film A Really Inconvenient Truth goes a step beyond Al Gore’s popular documentary by framing the current climate crisis within the context of capitalism.

7–9 p.m., free

Niebl-Proctor Marxist Library

6501 Telegraph, Oakl.

(510) 595-7417

SUNDAY, JAN. 23

 

Radical roots sing-a-long

Sing along to your favorite old-timey songs of struggle and dissent. This session focuses on songs from the civil rights and labor movements. Don’t know the words? Lyric sheets provided.

5 p.m., donation

Modern Times Book Store

888 Valencia, SF

(415) 282-9246

 

To Haitian women

Ayana Lobossiere, Judith Mirkinson, and Leslie Mullin — who recently visited Haiti and interviewed hundreds of Haitian women — report on the remarkable grassroots women’s groups working to rebuild Haiti, end the cholera epidemic, fight for democracy, and advocate for the people.

5:30–8:30 p.m., free

Albany United Methodist Church

980 Stannage, Albany

(510) 526-7346 2

Mail items for Alerts to the Guardian Building, 135 Mississippi St., SF, CA 94107; fax to (415) 437-3658; or e-mail alert@sfbg.com. Please include a contact telephone number. Items must be received at least one week prior to the publication date.

Gorgeously Gorey

2

caitlin@sfbg.com

NIGHTLIFE Actually, the Edwardian Ball — now in its 11th year of gothic, ghoulish, glorious celebration — isn’t strictly a gathering of period costume nerds. In fact, those who focus on historical accuracy, says event cofounder Justin Katz, are kind of missing the point. “Much to their frustration, the founders of the ball don’t care if your collar is Edwardian or not,” he chuckles.

That’s because, as any good SF costume freak will tell you, the original Edward of this shindig is Gorey, not Windsor. In its first years, it was actually named the Edward Gorey Ball, a theatrical homage to the work of the macabre writer and illustrator of such classics as the A-to-Z book of child demise, The Gashlycrumb Tinies. This tome was read at the ball’s first incarnation, which was hosted by Rosin Coven, the pagan lounge ensemble that has graced the stage each subsequent year.

Why Gorey? “Once we began to explore his work, we really enjoyed his ‘untelling’ of stories,” Katz continues. “Almost nothing happens in his books!” Which isn’t exactly true, of course, but his slight and spindly, grave-studded plot lines seem slightly unsuited for nightlife action, especially the bedazzled, bedazzling theatrical productions that Mike Gaines’ Vau de Vire Society circus-dance troupe so spectacularly gives birth to on stage at the ball.

“It isn’t the easiest thing to base a dramatic stage show on,” Gaines admits. “But Gorey left [his stories] up for interpretation. He was a real theatrical cat.” Gorey was a noted ballet fan, and his illustrated landscapes could easily double as sets. And if he did indeed mean for his creepy-cute stories to be blown into phantasmagoric carnivals someday, then he is smiling down on the Edwardian Ball.

But as far as the event goes these days, Gorey stories are but one of its attractions. In addition to all the offstage attractions at the ball (which has burgeoned into a weekend-long affair that includes an expo of steampunk wonder-toys, entire floors of the Regency Ballroom given over to vendors of satin and skeletal finery, even a Friday night-only Ferris Wheel to be erected inside the ballroom itself), the event has become a group therapy session for SF’s costume-addicted party people. Well, a therapy session in which the addicted bust out their most flagrant behavior and congratulate each other on having done so.

Top among Gaines’ favorite get-ups from years past was an homage to Gashlycrumb‘s Winnie, the poor tot who met her maker after becoming “embedded in ice.” The intrepid Edwardian in question encased herself in frosted Plexiglass for the evening’s festivities. Others choose more technically Edwardian-accurate ensembles, and others still will use the event as an excuse to wear whatever the hell gets their creative juices flowing: goth-steampunk-geisha, anyone?

This inclusivity most likely explains the success of the ball. Katz mentions that one is likely to see one of the aforementioned period fundamentalists having a cuppa with a giant grasshopper, one table over from a couple who “look like they just crawled out of a nightclub,” all in a steam-powered tea garden. And then they’ll all join in a round of ballroom dancing that takes place near the main stage on Saturday. One mustn’t forget about the ballroom dancing. *

EDWARDIAN BALL AND WORLD’S FAIR

Fri/21 “World’s Fair”: 8 p.m.– 2 a.m., $28–$75

Sat/22 bazaar: noon– 6 p.m., free; ball 8 p.m.– 2 a.m., $38–$85

Regency Ballroom

1300 Van Ness, SF

www.edwardianball.com