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Our Weekly Picks: February 16-22

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WEDNESDAY 16

MUSIC

Dum Dum Girls

Dee Dee, bandleader of Dum Dum Girls, a 1960s pop-meets-early punk, all-girl four piece, is no dummy. Named not for the lollipops, but after the Vaselines’ album Dum-Dum and the Iggy Pop song “Dum Dum Boys,” DDG was initially a solo project on Dee Dee’s DIY record label, Zoo Music. To take her music beyond her bedroom, she called on the help of her friends: Jules (guitar and vocals), Bambi (bass), and Sandy (drums and vocals). DDR’s most recent album, Sub Pop release I Will Be, features Nick Zinner of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs, Crocodiles’ Brandon Welchez, and Los Angeles musician Andrew Miller. (Jen Verzosa)

With Minks and Dirty Beaches

9 p.m., $12

Bottom Of The Hill

1233 17th St., SF

(415) 621-4455

www.bottomofthehill.com

 

THURSDAY 17

EVENT

The Tribes of Burning Man

Either you are or you aren’t: I’m an aren’t. As in, not a Burning Man person. But that won’t stop me from trumpeting the release of The Tribes of Burning Man, the end result of six years of work by Steven T. Jones, known around the Guardian as Steve the City Editor and on Burning Man’s playa as “Scribe.” Chances are you’ve seen Jones’ Burning Man coverage in the Guardian’s pages over the years; his new book examines the history and philosophy of the annual event, as well as the ways that Burning Man has become a year-round lifestyle for some and a (counter-) cultural touchstone for hundreds of thousands of desert-goers. The Tribes launch party features readings by Jones and appearances by Burning Man leader Larry Harvey, circus performers Fou Fou Ha, beat boxer Kid Beyond, and other colorful characters from the book. (Cheryl Eddy)

7 p.m., $5 ($20 with book)

Project One

251 Rhode Island, SF

www.p1sf.com

 

MUSIC

3 Inches of Blood

Though it has endured many lineup changes, 3 Inches of Blood is always instantly recognizable, thanks to the falsetto assault of vocalist Cam Pipes (his real name). Drawing on power metal and thrash but hewing closely to the classic sounds of the New Wave of British Heavy Metal, Pipes and his Vancouver-based band have plied their rock the world over. Fire Up the Blades (2007) experimented with polished, immaculate production, with Slipknot drummer Joey Jordison producing, but 2009 release Here Waits Thy Doom stripped away the gloss, returning the band to its raw, urgent roots. Now that it’s coming to town, you won’t have to wait for your doom any longer. (Ben Richardson)

With Eluveitie, Holy Grail, System Divide

7:30 p.m., $20

Slim’s

333 11th St., SF

(415) 255-0333

www.slims-sf.com

 

FILM

“Around the World in 33 Films: The Jeonju Digital Project”

The still-young Jeonju International Film Festival is exceptional for privileging film culture over film markets. To take one significant example of this emphasis, for each edition the festival commissions three half-hour digital films by major auteurs. It’s almost impossible to imagine an American festival apportioning funds in this internationalist, art-first manner. Yerba Buena Center for the Arts screens all 33 Jeonju commissions from 2000-10 over the next two weeks. It’s an ambitious — and, one imagines, costly — program, so make it count. This first show features an especially strong class of 2010 (James Benning, Denis Côté, and Matías Piñeiro), with works by the new century’s preeminent film artists (Pedro Costa, Apichatpong Weerasethakul, Jia Zhangke, etc.) waiting in the wings. (Max Goldberg)

Feb 17–27 (2010 program: tonight, 7:30 p.m.), $8

YBCA Screening Room

701 Mission, SF

(415) 978-2700

www.ybca.org

 

FRIDAY 18

MUSIC

Chromeo

At first listen, Chromeo’s music would seem to run the risk of being a little tough to take seriously — if only it wasn’t so damn well-executed. Instead, the Montreal-based electro-funk duo creates perfectly retro-minded jams that skimp refuse to scrimp on creative songcraft or purely visceral dance floor diversion. The fantastic talk box solos don’t hurt either. Taking its cues from classic era funk, Hall and Oates-style blue-eyed soul, and modern synthpop, Chromeo’s 2010 album Business Casual has led to a slew of strong reviews, festival appearances, and a top 10 slot on Billboard’s dance/electronic chart. (Landon Moblad)

With MNDR and the Suzan

8 p.m., $25

Fox Theater

1807 Telegraph, Oakl.

(510) 548-3010

www.thefoxoakland.com

 

MUSIC

Bart B More

How old is Bart B More? In videos from his recent Asian tour, he’s got the pallid complexion that my friends did in high school. Maybe a result of the DJ lifestyle, spending too much time in clubs around 2 a.m. (or being Danish). The rest of Bart B’s existence, from what I can tell, consists of lifting weights and looking at Lamborghinis. Ah, to be an international beat maker, an up-and-comer who’s reputedly worth checking out. Anyway, Blasthaus resident Nisus has proven himself a reliable dance floor driver, delivering a binaural set at the Treasure Island Music Festival and excellently setting up the Twelves earlier this month. (Ryan Prendiville)

With Nisus and Tron Jeremy

9 p.m., $12.50

Rickshaw Stop

155 Fell, SF

(415) 861-2011

www.rickshawstop.com

 

MUSIC

Mark Growden

Back from another long stretch of touring and recording, wandering minstrel Mark Growden lands at the Brava Theatre with a brand new album Lose Me in the Sand and a posse of old-school Tucson troubadours as the backing band. Less sweepingly-thematic than 2010’s Saint Judas, the new album combines oddments of philosophy, romance, humor, and reminiscence, covering familiar tunes in startlingly unfamiliar ways, plus a handful of originals including a breakneck-paced courting song “Settle in a Little While” and a sepia-toned hometown lament “Killing Time.” Growden’s long-time collaborator and Porto Franco labelmate Seth Ford Young opens and also releases his eponymous debut album. (Nicole Gluckstern)

With Seth Ford Young

Fri/18–Sat/19, 8 p.m., $20–$50

Brava Theatre

2781 24th St., SF

(415) 641-7657

www.brava.org

 

PERFORMANCE

Move Thru Me

“I’m with the band” may sound smoother than “I’m with the dance company,” although either could be stated by the performers of Move Thru Me, a collaboration of Christine Cali’s Cali & Co Dance and Matthew Langlois’ the Welcome Matt band. A hybrid of rock ‘n’ roll and modern dance, the performance responds to the pursuit of a creative life and ongoing artistic practice. Prior to joining forces, Cali and Langlois each worked as independent artists for more than 15 years. The work includes a soundtrack of original music as well as online dance videos. As with any good concert tour — T-shirts! (Julie Potter)

Fri/18–Sat/19, 8 p.m. (also Sun/20, 5 p.m.), $10–$20

Dance Mission Theater

3316 24th St., SF

(415) 826-4441

www.dancemission.com

 

SATURDAY 19

EVENT

“From Produce to Production: New Traditions in Bay Area Food Culture”

Bay Area Now (BAN6), a triennial celebrating local artists from diverse disciplines, begins with a series of Bay Area-centric conversations about food, environmentalism, futurism, community activism, radical identities, and technology. The first roundtable discussion addresses new practices for growing, preparing and shopping for food, during which YBCA Executive Director Ken Foster will speak with food luminaries Bryant Terry, eco-chef and activist from Oakland and author of Vegan Soul Kitchen; Novella Carpenter, journalist, farmer and author of Farm City; and Leif Hedendal, a self-educated chef at San Francisco’s Greens and Oakland’s Citron restaurants, whose Bay Area culinary events combine art and food. (Potter)

1 p.m., free

Yerba Buena Center for the Arts

701 Mission, SF

(415) 987-2787

www.ybca.org

 

EVENT

The Fortune Cookie Chronicles

Planning on consuming a little New Year’s nosh during this weekend’s bunny-fueled festivities? Then you might be interested to know that the Japanese — not Chinese — invented the fortune cookie; Chinese takeout cartons can be found everywhere but China; and chop suey may or may not be an elaborate American hoax. I see all you smartphone nerds plinking “chop suey” into snopes.com right now, but save yourselves the trouble: New York Times reporter and author of The Fortune Cookie Chronicles Jennifer 8. Lee is here to unravel the history of Chinese cookery — and just in time for the Chinese New Year. The book is also seasoned with a healthy smattering of SF history to spice things up. (Emily Appelbaum)

2:30–4 p.m., free

San Francisco Public Library

Chinatown Branch

1135 Powell, SF

(415) 557-4400

www.sfpl.org

 

SUNDAY 20

EVENT

“San Francisco Mixtape Society presents Guilty Pleasures”

Listening to Ke$ha on repeat? Excited about Britney Spears’ upcoming release, Femme Fatale? Love to share music? Then the San Francisco Mixtape Society has you covered. It presents “Guilty Pleasures,” a night of music mixtape exchanges. Assemble a mixtape according to the theme in any format — cassette, CD, or USB — and leave with a fellow attendee’s mixtape; they’ll be exchanged throughout the evening via a raffle. Those who come armed with tunes will receive a free drink — and all the joy guilty pleasures can provide. (Verzosa)

4–6 p.m., free

Make-Out Room

3225 22nd St., SF

(415) 647-2888

www.sfmixtapesociety.com

 

MONDAY 21

EVENT

“The Cleveland Confidential Book Tour”

As the guitarist for Rocket from the Tombs and the Dead Boys, Cheetah Chrome helped write the sonic blueprint for punk rock — and now he’s written an autobiography, Cheetah Chrome: A Dead Boy’s Tale From The Front Lines of Punk Rock, which chronicles his explosive life and his role in one of the most infamous movements in modern pop culture. Joining him for “The Cleveland Confidential Book Tour” are Mike Hudson from the Pagans and Bob Pfeifer from Human Switchboard; don’t miss your chance to hear the story straight from the mouths of a triumvirate of punks’ founding fathers. (Sean McCourt)

Tonight, 6 p.m., $10

Hemlock Tavern

1131 Polk, SF

(415) 923-0923

www.hemlocktavern.com.

Tues/22, 7 p.m., free

Moe’s Books

2476 Telegraph, Berk.

(510) 849-2087

www.moesbooks.com

Feb. 23, 7 p.m., free

Gallery Fifty24

218 Fillmore, SF

www.noisepop.com

 

TUESDAY 22

MUSIC

Odd Future

The Internet has birthed yet another rap group with disturbing lyrics (see also: Die Antwoord), but this time there’s no doubt regarding the collective’s genuine intentions. Members of Los Angeles hip-hop skate crew Odd Future Wolfgang Kill Them All (OFWKTA) range in age from 16 to 23 and wax philosophical about typical teenage concerns, from school and love to murder and bondage. Sometimes the music comes off like a hip-hop parallel to horror metal, but ultimately Odd Future is less about fetishizing violence than it is about offering an unfettered forum for the group’s personalities. Though their ages imply novelty, listening to the sharp, dense flow of Earl Sweatshirt or the lo-fi contorted funk of Tyler the Creator confirms there can be no doubt that these kids are headed for big, big things. (Peter Galvin)

9 p.m., $16

Slim’s

333 11th St., SF

(415) 255-0333

www.slims-sf.com

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Free at last?

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arts@sfbg.com

MUSIC Deep in East Oakland, in the 80s blocks of MacArthur Boulevard, I arrive at the locked door of a hole-in-the-wall barbershop. A handwritten sign says “closed for a private appointment,” but I knock anyway and gain admittance. Inside, Mistah FAB, a.k.a. the Prince of the Bay, lounges in the chair, getting a mural of a crown and the Bay Bridge shaved onto the back of his head. It’s a very hip-hop ‘do, befitting his present mood. For the occasion of our interview, in part, is his new release, an Internet mixtape of all-original music called I Found My Backpack. As the title suggests, it’s a return to his roots, FAB’s most straight-up hip-hop project since his pre-hyphy debut, Nig-Latin (Straight Hits, 2003).

“I wanted to start off this year with that vibe,” FAB says, over the low buzz of the clippers. “I went into the music I made before I had any success, music that made me happy.”

To be sure, 2010 was a difficult year for FAB. Not only did he have his first child, a daughter, but his mother (“my best friend,” he calls her) died of cancer, leaving him with no parents just as he became one. (His father, as chronicled on his breakthrough album, Son of a Pimp [Thizz, 2005], died of AIDS when FAB was 12.) FAB’s closest cousin also passed away, while his older brother — after a lifetime in and out of institutions — was sentenced to life in prison.

“A party song — that can’t express my pain,” FAB says. “I’m not going to ignore it because when you ignore it, it only grows more. I want to allow people to see the stresses and the pain that I go through.”

For someone who emerged during the Bay’s hedonistic hyphy era, FAB has had more than his share of stress. For the past three-and-a-half years, he’s been signed to Atlantic Records, which never released his projected album, Da Yellow Bus Ryder. Meanwhile, thanks to a dispute with KMEL’s former managing director, Big Von Johnson, FAB got no local radio play from the station since 2006, even when he was on Snoop Dogg’s 2008 hit “Life of Da Party,” which reached No. 14 on Billboard’s rap charts. Finally, as its most conspicuous proponent, FAB was hit hard by the backlash against hyphy that flared up in 2007.

Any of the above qualify as a career-killer, but FAB has refused to surrender, and his persistence is paying off. He’s finally negotiated an end to his contract with Atlantic, and plans to sign with L.A. Laker Ron Artest’s Tru Warrior label to release a full-blown album, Liberty Forever, later this year. His versatility has allowed him to reinvent himself even as he defiantly claims hyphy on Backpack‘s Droop-E-produced opener, “Blame Me.”

“People treated hyphy like it was witchcraft,” FAB laughs. “Like when the townspeople came to hunt for everybody who’d been involved, and everybody was like, ‘No! I did nothing hyphy! I never wore stunna shades!’ But I’m not ashamed of anything we done then. I had to get it off my chest because I wanted people to realize how fake they were being.”

Most significantly, FAB is being broadcast again by KMEL. Backpack‘s hip-hop vibe aside, he hasn’t renounced his commercial ambitions. A new single, “She Don’t Belong to Me,” featuring Universal Records R&B crooner London, has recently begun getting spins, following a regime change at the station; program director Stacy Cunningham was fired last year, while Johnson, though still a DJ, is no longer manager, replaced by assistant program director Kenard Karter.

“If you go around the country and hear Rick Ross, T-Pain, Lupe Fiasco shout out Mistah FAB, then it’s odd that you’re not playing him on the radio station you control,” FAB points out. “But [Karter] is about change and giving artists such as myself a fair shot. He reached out to me a few weeks ago, and they’ve been playing my new record here and there, which is better than never there.”

This development potentially goes beyond FAB to the entire Bay, whose artists are seldom represented on Clear Channel-owned KMEL. But is Karter really about change? In an e-mail interview two weeks ago, he acknowledged that he hopes to increase airplay for local artists. But when asked what’s preventing it, he was inconclusive at best. “Its all about the music,” he wrote. “Quality, mass appeal music that garners passion is the standard for KMEL.”

This is the same line KMEL has pushed for years, implying that Bay Area artists are at fault for not making quality music. For a concrete example of an artist meeting his criteria, I asked about J-Stalin. Stalin has one of the most passionate followings in Oakland; I hear his music slappin’ in passing cars, on BART, even in the elevator in my apartment building. Yet KMEL put nothing in rotation from last year’s The Prenuptial Agreement (SMC, 2010), which debuted at No. 1 on Rasputin’s rap chart.

“I can’t comment,” Karter wrote, regarding Stalin. “I don’t know much about him.”

When I asked about FAB, Karter stopped replying, refusing to confirm even meeting with him. I can’t say for sure why, though I imagine his reluctance to discuss FAB stems from not wanting to acknowledge the ban in the first place.

I don’t want to criticize Karter. I’m thrilled he’s playing FAB, and he deserves some time to show and prove. But the Bay needs the radio. Radio made FAB a star back in 2005 when KMEL was banging “Super Sic Wid It,” while his later lack of airplay gave Atlantic cold feet about releasing his album. With his current single, FAB is merely testing the waters; he has an arsenal of bigger singles to release — if the radio will play them. “I have crazy records people would be amazed by,” FAB says. “Records with T-Pain, Snoop Dogg, Talib Kweli, one with Rick Ross and Jadakiss over a Justus League beat — you know, just playing the power names, like, look what I been doing over the years. So if they give this a run, they gonna love what I have in store for them.”

Dirty business

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rebeccab@sfbg.com

The owner of a certified minority-owned business in San Francisco is suing the city, charging that his telecommunications company went belly up after city officials falsely accused him of participating in a fraudulent kickback scheme within the city’s Department of Building Inspection (DBI).

The case and depositions of high-ranking officials offer a rare window into the inner workings of city government at a time when corruption was rife within DBI and regulations governing city contracting were considerably less strict. They also provide a glimpse at how city business was sometimes conducted under the administration of Mayor Willie Brown, a powerful figure who has resurfaced recently in San Francisco politics.

In addition, the case alleges inappropriate behavior by current Mayor Ed Lee when he was the city’s purchasing director. One of the depositions includes allegations that Lee, at Brown’s direction, approved a city contractor who was utterly unqualified and was later accused of being part of a criminal scam.

The plaintiff in the lawsuit — James Brady, CEO of Cobra Solutions — closed up shop years ago and moved to Sacramento with his wife and business partner, Debra. But he’s been locked in an ongoing legal battle against powerful forces in City Hall since 2003, when he claims the city stopped issuing payments to his company, terminated its contract, and declined to award it a new contract on suspicions of bribery.

“They want to make us look like we’re Bonnie and Clyde,” Brady told the Guardian. “We’ve never done a thing.”

Nancy Fineman, an attorney with the firm Cotchett, Pitre & McCarthy, which is representing the city in the case, said the corruption allegations against Cobra still stand and she emphasized, “The city attorney was not involved in doing anything wrong.”

In a complaint filed Jan. 7, attorney G. Whitney Leigh — law partner of former Board of Supervisors President Matt Gonzalez — alleges that a host of city officials are responsible for precipitating Brady’s financial ruin.

According to Leigh’s version of events, Cobra was dragged into an overzealous campaign to hold someone accountable after a contractor the city alleged was corrupt vanished, leaving a number of subcontractors unpaid and the city “with egg on its face.”

Leigh subpoenaed Ed Harrington, former city controller and current head of the San Francisco Public Utilities Commission; Deputy City Controller Monique Zmuda; former officials from the Office of Contract Administration, and others to testify out of court during discovery. Leigh describes the case as “a Shakespearean tragedy combined with a cartoon combined with a soap opera.”

For City Attorney Dennis Herrera, it might be more like a zombie flick. The city attorney is gaining momentum in his campaign for mayor and has taken an early lead in fundraising against his opponents. The Cobra Solutions saga might be one that he — and other top city officials — would rather forget.

 

CONFLICTS AND CRACKDOWNS

Appeals in the case have reached all the way to the California Supreme Court, which ruled that Herrera had a conflict of interest that should have disqualified his office from suing Cobra. Beginning in September 2000, before he was elected city attorney, Herrera provided legal representation to Cobra while working with a private firm called Kelly, Gill, Sherburne & Herrera.

Due to the disqualification, Herrera could not discuss specifics in the case. But he did offer us a general comment. “I’ve made it very clear that me and my office are going to have zero tolerance for corruption and individuals who would violate the public trust,” he said. “This case, I think, represents that philosophy.”

When Herrera was campaigning for city attorney in the November 2001 race, he ran on a platform of cracking down on fraud and corruption. The DBI case began as a triumphant delivery of that campaign promise.

In 2003, following a yearlong investigation by a Public Integrity Task Force that Herrera had convened, a corrupt DBI official named Marcus Armstrong got busted by the feds. He’d allegedly falsified the qualifications on his resume and set up shell companies to funnel money out of city coffers for his own personal gain. He pleaded guilty to corruption charges brought by the U.S. Attorney, and spent time in prison for cheating the city out of about $500,000.

Herrera brought a civil suit against Armstrong and a DBI contractor, Government Computer Sales, Inc. (GCSI), which allegedly partnered with Armstrong in a kickback scheme. Questions surrounded GCSI from the start. It only gained certification as a city contractor after being rejected multiple times by city staff as unqualified. Deborah Vincent-James, who directed the city’s Committee on Information Technology (COIT) at the time and has since died, testified in a 2008 deposition that GCSI was “fraudulent” and got the contract only because of ties to Mayor Brown.

Herrera hit a stumbling block when he amended the complaint to name Cobra Solutions and its management company, TeleCon Ltd., as another city contractor in on Armstrong’s kickback scheme. (Debra Brady was president of TeleCon, which predated Cobra. Although the Bradys insist the two entities were separate, Herrera named TeleCon in the suit as an alter ego of Cobra.)

Cobra struck back, claiming the City Attorney’s Office wasn’t entitled to file suit against the company because Herrera’s old firm had represented Brady. Herrera told us the whole thing came about “because of the 18 minutes that I billed to work for Cobra.”

Herrera’s office initially denied any conflict of interest. “Immediately upon discovery of Cobra’s role, the office screened Herrera off from further involvement in the investigation and all matters related to it in accordance with a stringent ethical screening policy Herrera established when he took office,” according to a statement issued by the City Attorney’s Office.

But the Supreme Court disagreed in a 2006 ruling. “The possibility that the City Attorney’s former client might be prosecuted for civil fraud by the City Attorney’s office may test public faith in the integrity of the judicial system,” the ruling stated, “raising the specter of perceptions that the former client will be treated more leniently because of its connections, or more harshly because of leaked confidences.”

 

COBRA’S CASH

The city’s lawsuit alleged that Cobra paid Armstrong about $240,000 in bribes in exchange for $2.4 million worth of business with DBI from April 1999 through 2000. The allegation was based on checks Cobra sent to Monarch Enterprises, which the city said was an Armstrong front. The investigation found that GCSI paid Armstrong about 10 percent of the contract amount in a similar fashion.

“Armstrong used these and all other funds received from Cobra for his personal benefit and gain,” the suit claimed. The complaint also charges, “Cobra … knew that Monarch enterprises was wholly owned and controlled by Armstrong, and that any payment made by Cobra was in fact a payment to Armstrong.”

But Cobra’s suit claims an FBI investigation into Cobra’s involvement found no wrongdoing. Additionally, “We turned all of our records over to the U.S. Attorney,” Leigh noted, and that didn’t lead to a criminal prosecution.

Brady calls the corruption allegation “a big lie,” and says his company’s name has been wrongfully sullied. He says Armstrong led him to believe Monarch Enterprises was an Internet company performing training, support, and computer security upgrades as a subcontractor. The bills came in, and Cobra believed it was responsible for paying for the service, Brady said. “We mailed the checks, and never thought about it.”

Before the trouble started, Cobra Solutions was in a growth phase, having gone from four employees to 35 in just a few years. James and Debra Brady moved from Colorado to San Francisco in the late 1980s with nothing. James Brady worked as a manager in several SROs, became a member of the Tenderloin Merchant’s Association and helped establish a credit union serving low-income residents.

The couple established TeleCon Ltd. and started out as city subcontractors providing voicemail services. At first, they had very limited resources. “Prior to being able to afford an office, Debra frequently used the telephones in the women’s lounge at Nordstrom to conduct business,” according to her bio.

Cobra was established after Vincent-James urged the Bradys to submit a bid for an upcoming contract. The city had opened up a Request for Proposals (RFP) for vendors who wanted to be admitted to the Computer Store, an entity created to speed up municipal orders for technical services.

Before then, it could take six months for the city to purchase so much as a desktop computer. A Human Rights Commission vetting process, designed to ensure that city contractors adhered to environmental and social justice criteria, caused long delays. Then-City Purchaser Ed Lee created the Computer Store to solve this logistical challenge. Vendors who applied for membership were vetted in the RFP (minority-owned businesses were given preference), admitted as certified contractors, and granted preference by city departments in need of IT services.

Cobra’s first departmental contract through the Computer Store was a $1.3 million agreement to provide technical services for DBI, working with Armstrong. Things got off to a rough start.

“We could never find the guy, he would never be at work, and when we did see him, he was complaining,” Brady recounted. According to Cobra’s complaint, “it ran into a series of disputes with DBI and Armstrong over the scope of work and particular payment issues,” and Cobra was eventually awarded a settlement reflecting services it provided after Armstrong changed the scope of the work.

Brady says he sought city help in dealing with Armstrong. According to Cobra’s complaint, he appealed for assistance to COIT, which oversaw the Computer Store. Cobra’s relationship with Armstrong soon soured, and the DBI deal dissolved.

According to the description of Vincent-James, “The relationship between James Brady … and Marcus got worse … Marcus got another company involved because James Brady would not do what Marcus wanted to do.”

The other company was GCSI.

 

NEW PHASE

Things got better for the Bradys before they got worse. Cobra became one of the city’s largest technology services providers, netting $14.5 million in contracts with various city agencies by 2003. They relocated to a nicer, more spacious office in the Financial District.

A partnership with IBM granted them access to higher credit limits than ever. The couple had a home custom-built in El Sobrante. When GCSI vanished without a trace, Vincent-James called on Cobra to hire some of the GCSI subcontractors who had gotten burned in the process, according to a deposition from former city purchaser Judith Blackwell.

By 2003, the Public Integrity Task Force’s DBI investigation was in full swing, but Brady didn’t know it. He says he started experiencing problems getting paid, yet couldn’t get an explanation from city agencies.

According to Cobra’s complaint, “The city intentionally frustrated payments to Cobra and TeleCon because investigators hastily and incorrectly concluded that the companies had conspired with Armstrong in a GCSI-type scheme to defraud the city.”

Fineman, the city’s attorney, said she strongly disagrees with “the idea that we just stopped and left them in the lurch,” emphasizing that there had been a whole separate legal proceeding arising out of the fact that “Cobra was not paying its subcontractors,” in violation of its contract.

The city defended its decision to delay Cobra’s payments by pointing to the GCSI scandal, which had left city agencies high and dry. “By the time the City discovered GCSI’s fraud and stopped making payments to GCSI, GCSI had already received millions of dollars in city payments that were not then passed on to the subcontractors,” a letter from the City Attorney’s Office to Brady’s attorneys explained. “Once the city started investigating the payments to GCSI that Marcus Armstrong authorized, GCSI’s assets, officers and staff disappeared. … The city has an obligation to its taxpayers to prevent the GCSI scenario from unfolding with regard to Cobra / TeleCon.”

Brady insists that because Cobra couldn’t get paid, it couldn’t pay its subcontractors, or its creditors, either — and the financial holdup triggered a cascade of losses. “I’ve got IBM, Booz Allen Hamilton, and American Express breathing down on me like a dragon,” he said. “Everybody wants to get paid. We owed folks after we couldn’t collect our receivables.”

The bills were piling up. “We were sinking fast,” said Debra Brady, “so we sold our house in El Sobrante.”

Brady said he was stunned to learn that Cobra had been named in Herrera’s suit.

“I have 37 employees, and I had to go in and tell them. I was all choked up and the phone was ringing, and it was my attorney on the line telling me that the FBI was coming. I could not believe that after everything we had achieved in the last three years, my former attorney was filing a lawsuit against me.”

 

CLEARING THEIR NAMES

After filing the complaint against Cobra, the City Attorney’s Office called on the company to submit to an audit — but Cobra refused on the basis that Herrera’s firm had represented it in the past. “The City Attorney’s assumption of the role of auditor seems calculated to exacerbate and expand the existing conflict of interest,” Cobra attorney Ethan Balogh wrote in an April 2003 letter. “This problem could easily be solved by allowing an agency other than the City Attorney to conduct the audit.”

In a lengthy back-and-forth, Herrera’s office responded: “You have never explained why your client, having been caught sending over $240,000 in cash to a San Francisco IT manager who authorized over $2.4 million in payments to Cobra/TeleCon during the period of time which he received those payments, has elected not to immediately … open its books and records to the city. Instead … you have raised a host of constantly-shifting objections and arguments as to why the city’s demand was inappropriate.”

Cobra’s lawsuit charges that the City Attorney’s Office never informed the Controller’s Office that Cobra would have allowed an audit by another party. At the same time, it charges, city attorneys weren’t allowing Cobra to communicate with the controller directly, due to the legal dispute.

“The question of who would do the audit and whether or not the City Attorney was doing the audit was not something that I was aware of or certainly had not agreed to,” Deputy City Controller Monique Zmuda said during her deposition.

Meanwhile, Cobra had received the highest Human Rights Commission score of any bidder for a renewal on the Computer Store contract, an HRC document shows. Brady received a letter stating that his company would be awarded a new Computer Store contract — but shortly after, he got a second letter reversing that award.

Judith Blackwell, who oversaw city purchasing under Brown’s administration, explained why during her deposition with Leigh. After Cobra’s bid evaluation, Blackwell testified, her office moved to award the contract — but the controller intervened, saying Cobra shouldn’t be awarded a new contract because of the Armstrong scandal. Blackwell wasn’t willing to throw Cobra out, however.

“I learned from watching politics that I cannot afford to bend the rules,” Blackwell testified. “If I step outside the precise boundaries in any way, or if any African American administrator does, they are probably not going to be interpreted in the same way as if anyone else did it. Based on the … procurement code, there is no way that I could, as the purchasing director, just throw them out.”

Blackwell testified that Zmuda requested that she sign paperwork denying Cobra the contract, and Blackwell received a warning when she refused. “She told me that I needed to remember that when [Mayor Brown] was gone that they, the Controller’s Office, and [Chief of Staff Steve Kawa] — I knew that is what she was implying — were in charge,” Blackwell said. Once Mayor Gavin Newsom replaced Brown, Blackwell was let go. She now lives in New York City.

Blackwell testified that losing her job came as a surprise, since she’d worked on Newsom’s campaign and expected to keep her position. “I had asked him something about why it happened and he said … he knew nothing about it and people were acting without, you know, basically not at his direction,” Blackwell testified. “I said, well, Mayor Newsom, you are in charge. And his response was, oh, I wish that were so.” 

 


ED LEE APPROVED UNQUALIFIED CONTRACTOR ACCUSED OF CORRUPTION

GCSI — a company accused of defrauding the city after improperly being given a city contract by Ed Lee, allegedly at the urging of then-Mayor Willie Brown — is long gone.

“I don’t think they’re around,” Nancy Fineman, an attorney representing the city, told the Guardian. “We’ve just been focused on Cobra and TeleCon.”

The story of how GCSI came to be a city contractor may be the most fascinating part of this case, one that could have repercussions today, even though it happened in the late-1990s.

Like Cobra Solutions, GCSI was a contractor with the city’s Computer Store — gaining admission after being repeatedly rejected by city staff, according to a 2008 deposition with former COIT director Deborah Vincent-James, who has died.

Vincent-James testified that GCSI didn’t meet the minimum qualifications and recounted how, during an interview with city officials about the bid, a member of the City Attorney’s Office noticed a wire peeking out from the suit of a GCSI representative who had been surreptitiously taping the meeting.

“San Francisco was not aware of GCSI’s wrongful conduct, financial problems, or legal difficulties at the time it hired GCSI to work on the DBI projects,” a city lawsuit claimed. Nor had the city realized that, “GCSI’s president and owner had been arrested and imprisoned by a federal judge for contempt of court and for disbursing funds in an effort to avoid …efforts to collect its loan.”

GCSI principal Robert Fowler resided in both Washington, D.C., and California, was believed to be a citizen of Sweden, and was also the director and owner of a bank located on the Caribbean island of St. Vincent, according to Herrera’s complaint.

“From day one, I knew that they were not qualified,” Vincent-James’ deposition transcript reads. She went on to say that the official city process for evaluating contractors was “totally bypassed.” Nonetheless, “We had to admit them to the Computer Store.”

“Who told you, you had to admit them to the Computer Store?” attorney Whitney Leigh asked.

“The director of purchasing,” states Vincent-James’ deposition transcript. “Ed Lee.”

She went on to testify that Lee had been acting under the direction of Mayor Brown. According to her deposition, “[Lee] was directed by the Mayor’s Office and told to do an evaluation process. They evaluated them. They were put in the store.” She also testified, “Principals of GCSI hired an attorney who had been in the State Legislature with Mayor Brown and … GCSI had felt that because we were asking intrusive questions during the oral interview, such as ‘Why do you have that wire hanging out of your coat?’ … They felt that biased the committee toward … not hiring them.”

Neither Brown nor Mayor Lee’s office responded to requests for comment.

GCSI is still a codefendant in the complaint, but the principals of the defunct company seem to be off the hook. A 2008 story from the Anchorage Daily News noted that Fowler had emerged as the head of a natural gas company in Alaska. The Bradys, meanwhile, are getting ready for another court date in March. “We keep going to court,” Debra Brady said. “I’m kind of like, when is the end coming?”

Sound and environment: Moving beyond tropical bass with Chief Boima

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A couple weeks ago I shot a long-winded email to former Bay Area DJ and producer Chief Boima. I had just finished speaking to Dun Dun of the Los Rakas crew for what eventually became this article, and he mentioned an upcoming EP with former Bay Area DJ and producer Boima. Now, if you don’t know about Boima, you need to get acquainted with the Banana Clipz digital funk on Ghetto Bassquake (for free download, too). It’s a joint instrumental album between Boima and Oro 11 of Bersa Discos that merges electronic architectonics with rhythms, melodies, and sound bits from the African diaspora.
Enough of that, though — Boima withstood my long-windedness, and after a couple exchanges, he did all the explaining.

SFBG Dun said that you do with instrumentals what Los Rakas does with lyrics. Do you see similarities in your respective styles? Your backgrounds and influences?
Chief Boima Well, when I first came across Los Rakas I had just come back from Panama, and I was on this high from hearing all the big carnaval tunes and the mix of sounds that reflected my musical and cultural background, but in a Spanish-speaking world. I grew up on the stuff that a lot of Panamanians grew up on, zouk, dancehall, soca, etc. So I was at the SF Carnaval and I heard Panamanian reggae but with this Bay Area flavor to it. (Check my initial reaction here, and I had been posting stuff like this.) I identified with what they were doing immediately.
Also, my father is from Sierra Leone, and I grew up with West African cultural influences, so I try to incorporate that musically into my electronic and hip-hop beats. I feel like Los Rakas do the same thing with Panama, and what Dun said is a great compliment.

SFBG Dun also mentioned a future EP coming up. What’s your process working with Los Rakas? What are some of your thoughts on this upcoming EP?
CB Well I linked up with Rico and Dun after not seeing them for maybe a year. I had given Rico some instrumentals and I never had gotten the chance to record on them. At that point I had a little studio set up in my spot in Oakland, so I invited them down to work on stuff. I think it was a real natural collaboration because we knocked out a lot of different stuff in like 6 months. They would come over and just freestyle or write. A lot of songs came out through different processes. Like one song they gave me an acapella and I constructed a beat around it. Other songs, I played them the beat and they’d just start writing to it, and we’d record. This would all happen after work and on weekends, so it was cool because the sessions were real compact but productive. I’m real excited about the EP. I think the material is strong and unique, so I can’t wait to see the reception.

SFBG “Tropical” or “tropical bass” seems to be the new term which has emerged to cover the range of new electronic music informed by both American and Afro-Latin styles of music, and their many convergences and hybrids. Do you see yourself as part of this tropical movement? Would you trace its form or define it differently?
CB I get the name tropical bass, but I see it akin to a label like world music that’s just kind of vague. I think the styles that are included under the genre are diverse musically, but they share similarities in the production process that is informed by increased access to technology and information across the world. It’s also really related to urban environments, like hip-hop and house were in their beginning stages. So I see all this music as a kind of continuum of hip-hop and electronic music from Detroit and Chicago. I see myself as part of that production process, more than a musical genre.
The genres I enjoy and work with are informed by their local environments and have names like hip-hop, dancehall, coupe decale, house, soca, and kuduro. They come out of specific regions, and their environments inform the music. A lot of the most popular rhythms are related to Africa and its diaspora, people who are generally scattered around the tropics. So that’s why people use tropical, but I wouldn’t necessarily describe myself or anyone else that way. It doesn’t really work anymore when you get [sounds like] Balani in Mali, or UK Funky, which are not tropical [in setting], but are still informed by the same aesthetics and production processes.

SFBG Do you try to digitize or transfer Afro-Latin/Caribbean folk sounds, genres, or ideas into electronic form?
CB Yes, but I don’t explicitly set that as a goal. I add in all my influences, which are informed by growing up in the Midwest and spending time on the West Coast as much as “folk” music. I was into hip-hop and electronic music growing up, and my older relatives would get down to music that was recorded by live instruments. I love those older tunes, they make me nostalgic, and make me feel connected to my culture, so I wanted to bring the feelings that I have when I hear them to a contemporary club space.

SFBG Our sense of place is now more amorphous than it was maybe thirty years ago. The Internet has in many ways uprooted us, and with regards to music, given us access to all sorts of folk genres, sonic forms of indigenous culture, traditional sounds and instruments, beforehand only accessible perhaps by being there or coming into contact with someone who was indeed there. To what extent do you think the open source availability of the Internet influences the way you channel folk forms of music and older sonic traditions in your production? In what way does place or region (whether the Bay, Cuba, NY, or online places, even the temperate range of tropical) inform your music?
CB I think the Internet has facilitated interactions and dialogue, but you can’t overlook things like increased immigration and traveling. A New York Times article recently said that New York is as diverse as it’s ever been. It claims that NY has more people born in other countries living there than ever before. The whole United States is changing. Europe is changing. The feedback loop to global centers of production in the “South” is super influential. International travel is becoming cheaper, so it’s easier to see the whole world. I think we’re going to reach an energy crisis in the near future where all that will be curbed a little, and the Internet will keep those interactions going, but we’re really living at the apex of an empire, just like the Romans, and the Ottomans, and the Greeks were super diverse civilizations informed by cultures from all over the world. So the Internet is just our current means of achieving those interactions. It takes the place of the role that sailors and desert caravans and conquerors had before. It’s just faster, and totalizing across the globe.
I travel a lot, and I have a diverse cultural background with multiple influences. That puts me in a certain position of influence because of my experience, but someone who has never traveled can have the same influences because I post about it on the Internet. But that doesn’t mean that it’s a new thing. Cotton and sugar comes from India. Potatoes come from Peru. Coffee comes from Ethiopia. These are things that are fundamental to our cultural identity today, but we don’t necessarily think about them as coming from other places. I feel like these things seep into everyday life, and they become a part of wherever they end up whether NY, London, Rio, Kampala, etc. But when they get to those places I think they change. In other words, environment’s influence is fundamental and if you listen hard you can tell the difference.

I’m not Das Racist, but…

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Social construct-questioning rap duo (trio if you count the group’s hypeman, we should) Das Racist is coming to the Independent tonight – but don’t worry white people, the show’s already sold out, which means that rather than sit through a scene like this, you can read the following blog post and still be able to participate in discussions of the group’s artistic merit and stainless steel balls with your friends at brunch this weekend. 

Here we have assembled an Interwebs dossier on the three Wesleyan boys that would call racism on oh-so-many things in our modern day society. Who would have ever thought, back in those halcyon “Combination Pizza Hut and Taco Bell” days that we’d be calling them astute lyricists. Which we are. And to say they’re self-important, well that would be like saying it about Kanye West: a waste of time. Anyways, here’s your Das Racist 101.

This is the song the group got famous on. Everyone was really surprised when it’s subsequent offerings weren’t as surface-stupid. But those guys rap real good. Here’s one of my favorites, you can read it and then when you click on a phrase you don’t understand the website explains it for you! 

At times, writers are inspired by the group’s insistent riffs on social mores that serve to unfairly regulate our society. So much so, in fact, that they will write an article in which all capital letters are eschewed. That’s called “subverting hierarchy.”   

Writers loove to write about Das Racist (sup!) A New York Times Magazine writer made fun of Das Racist, but the group also made fun of a New York Times Magazine writer. At the same time. It was like a mobius strip of ill-concealed unease and disregard.  

Das Racist actually makes fun of many attempts to write about it, that is when they’re not systematically eviscerating socio-cultural commentary on their contribution to hip-hop. But Das Racist will offer unsolicited feedback about one music site’s reviews on another music site “in order” to educate future journalists. Don’t say they never gave you nothin’, stinky writers. 

Das Racist gets banned from bars, is given a second chance, and then gets banned from the bar again. They also took drugs in college to get over feeling weird about being there. That’s Wesleyan for ya.

Das Racist has the ability to make Katy Perry sound hallucinogenically more interesting than she normally does. Das Racist also makes a super hot mixtape, granted you like the word “fuck.” Who doesn’t, really? And the group makes a great music video.  

Here’s the concert deets, but like I said – no mas tickets available. Just read about them on the Internet, that’s what everyone else is doing. I’ll leave you with a haiku that Himanshu Suri wrote for that Flavorwire article I linked to in paragraph six.

 

Hip-hop dies each year.

How many lives hip-hop got?

Is hip-hop a cat?  

 

Das Racist 

Feat. HOTTUB and DJ Vin Sol

Weds/2 8 p.m., $15

The Independent

628 Divisadero, SF

(415) 771-1421

www.theindependentsf.com

 

Panabay rising

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MUSIC Last year was a big one for Los Rakas. The Oakland-by-way-of-Panama duo, Raka Rich and Raka Dun, have been hustling their frenetic Panabay stylings since they banded together as high school students in 2005. But on the cusp of their second mixtape, La Tanda Del Bus, the arresting diversity of their influences and musical ideas began to coalesce. The far reaches of the blogosphere and the streets took notice.

Los Rakas’ “Abrazame” — a song reworked from Gyptian’s crossover hit “Hold You” and remixed into sure shot form by Brooklyn producer Uproot Andy — overcrowded year-end lists as the pinnacle summer jam of 2010. In the video, parallel love stories unfold and collapse over the backdrop of San Francisco’s Carnaval Festival. Shuffling polyrhythms swarm underneath simple Casio chords as Raka Rich moves effortlessly from trading syrupy verses with guest songstress Faviola to bursts of rapid-fire lyricism.

Meanwhile, the video for Los Rakas’ “Soy Raka” — a youthful ode to turfin’ in the streets of Oakland — has surpassed 250,000 hits on YouTube. What other rap groups spit a chorus like “Tengo mi pistola y diente de oro” on the same playlist as a sweltering love ballad? The video not only helped spawn the syncopated dance movement in Panama, but also inspired kids to prefix their names with Raka — “you know, like Raka Miguel” — Dun tells me excitedly in a thick Spanish accent. “In Panama, ‘That’s raka’ or ‘We’re from raka’ means ‘that’s ghetto’ or ‘we’re from the ghetto.’ But it’s an empowering term. It means that we’re proud of who we are and where we come from.”

This sort of community-centered spirit has inspired Los Rakas since the beginning of its rhapsodic ventures. In 2006, Rich and Dun released their first Panabay Twist mixtape with the help and studio support of local outreach organizations Youth Uprising, BUMP (Bay Unity Music Project), and Youth Movement Records. Its single, “Mi Barrio,” in many ways a precursor to the anthemic “Soy Raka,” is driven by the standard hip-hop commandment to represent where you’re from. But the song also honors a more difficult and subtle hip-hop ideal: one love. Los Rakas might boast about Oakland and Panama stomping grounds, but the duo also calls out for us to be “orgulloso and put your flag in the air.” Which flag, exactly?

“Oakland influenced us,” says Dun, who moved to the Bay when he was 14. “It didn’t just shape our instrumentals and lyrical style, from Zion I to E-40—Oakland has the history of the Black Panthers and politicism, so we naturally put that content in our music too.”

Los Rakas sound a bit different from, say, any other Bay Area rapper, because Rich and Dun’s music is informed by the infectious rhythms and punctuated Spanish flows heard in Panama’s pop music of the day, plena. A sprawling folk genre that originated in the Caribbean and related regions of Central America, plena has recently been digitized for a new generation, becoming a Panamanian spin on reggaeton.

But the influences don’t stop there. “In Panama we listen to all types of music: reggae, dancehall, salsa, meringue,” says Dun. “When I met Rico, he was listening to Tupac and we traded music. Hip-hop caught my attention fast. I found out about Tribe [Called Quest], Lil Kim, Nas. I researched where it came from, and how it evolved, and just fell in love with it.” Although the connections aren’t obvious at first, hip-hop and plena have a lot in common. They’re both hybrid genres, forms of pastiche that draw from a wide range of sonic traditions and background, computerizing folk and funk for the bass-hungry children of the always-evolving soundsystem.

Unsurprisingly, Los Rakas garnered attention from an emerging scene of enthusiasts, producers, DJs, writers, and musicians concerned with the musical diaspora of the Afro-Caribbean, or more acutely, what British sociologist Paul Gilroy has called the Black Atlantic. The term denotes the webbed network of the African diaspora culture that is not so much organized by a clear conception of roots but by a rhizomatic set of exchanges and networks: migrations, ships, trade, Creole, European miscegenation, flights, origin myths, stories of repatriation, and now the most diffusive cross-cultural exchange device of them all, the Internet.

Keep in mind that 2010 was the year that Diplo and Switch’s over-the-top dancehall project, Major Lazer, took clubs by storm, and even Rihanna finally started reppin’ roots, rhythm, and wires with “Rude Boy” and multicolored neon booty shorts. Even if MIA’s third full-length was lackluster, something of her world-town swagger has penetrated our times, while her “Bird Flu” call to arms has circulated through our quickly multiplying musical economies. Check the formula: add world genre to rap and uptempo dancehall/Bmore/house/techno; reconfigure percussion patterns in a drum machine; loop melodic fragments of a regional instrument; add inner-city noise, gunshots, chants, or field recordings of aggressive animal life; manipulate with a swill of static, fuzz, and a heavy dose of low end. Bump loud. Call it third world democracy.

Los Rakas, without even asking for it, has popped up in countless mixes and blog posts loosely labeled under the category of tropical bass. Rich and Dun contributed the steady banger “Afro Latino” to the recent Banana Clipz EP, produced by tropical harbingers Chief Boima and Ora 11 of Bersa Discos, and released on their Ghetto Bassquake blog and upstart. Speaking of Bersa, it hosts the crazy monthly Tormenta Tropical, which spotlights new sounds of electro-cumbia and related frontiers arising from the Black Atlantic. “That movement, I’m not sure what to call it, embraced us,” says Dun. It only makes sense that Los Rakas — navigating Oakland and Panama, turfin’ and plena, hiphop and digital polyrhythms, the new and the old — has returned the favor.

AUDYSSEY PRESENTS THE NEIGHBORHOOD: LOS RAKAS

with Roach Gigz

Wed/2, 9 p.m.–-2 a.m.; free

111 Minna Gallery

111 Minna, SF

(415) 974-1719

www.111minnagallery.com

Protest in solidarity with Egypt and Tunisia uprising

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As President Barack Obama insists that governments must maintain power “through consent and not coercion” organizers have announced a protest this Saturday, January 29, in San Francisco, in solidarity with people in Egypt, Tunisia, and other countries struggling against 30 years of dictatorship, poverty, unemployment and torture–and are condemning what they call Obama’s “refusal to condemn the Mubarak regime.”

In a press release, Mohammed Talat, an Egyptian organizer of Saturday’s protest commented that “Despite the extreme Egyptian government repression of its citizens on the streets, mass police violence, killings, and arrests, the blocking of internet and cell phone communication, the US government is still refusing to condemn the Mubarak regime.  As individuals in the US, we protest this inaction and express support for our brothers and sisters in Egypt.”

The protest begins noon, Saturday, at Montgomery BART, followed by a march to the UN Plaza.

Can they shut off the Internet?

20

Proverbs for paranoids: If they can catch you asking the wrong questions, they don’t have to worry about answers.


— T. Pynchon


Indulge me here while I get a little paranoid and venture into a realm where it’s easy to get dismissed as a nutcase. And I’ll say this upfront: I really don’t know how much I ought to worry about this.


But: The Egyptian government just tried to decapitate the protests in the streets by shutting down the Internet, and it was relatively easy; four ISPs threw the switches at government command, and bingo — no more email or websites talking about how to toss the bums out. John Weber at the Bay Citizen (who is neither a nutcase nor a paranoid) says this is a first (although China and other countries have censored internet traffic and limited use, this is different; it’s a total sudden shutdown of what was an open service).


So it’s worth asking, anyway: Could that happen in other countries, including ours?


Well, you don’t have to be way out in loony land to be worried about the Lieberman Protecting Cyberspace as a National Asset Act. Yes, I realize all the talk of an Internet Kill Switch sounds batty. We talked about this today on sfbg radio, and Johnny told me I was way wacko: the Internet is so essential to commerce in this country that the corporate powers that be would never allow it to be throttled. Tens of billions of dollars would be lost in moments; the stock market and the banking system couldn’t function.


But the scary thing is that it wouldn’t be all the difficult. All you’d have to do is cut off the domain name servers and nobody could find anything. (Yeah, you can bypass that with website numbers — IP addresses — but most people don’t have those handy.) And one company, Sprint (I think) owns most of the switches that direct all the traffic in this country; shut them off and every city would be isolated.


The web was designed to be redundant; a natural (or unnatural) disaster in New York or Chicago wouldn’t cripple Internet traffic around the country. And I’m not saying that Obama (or his successors) would ever actually try to squelch protest in the U.S. by taking such a drastic step.


But the fact remains that technically, it wouldn’t be that hard to do what Egypt did, and shut things down for a while. And since so much of our political communication in this country is based on the web, it seems somehow that our ability to talk to each other in times of crisis is a wee bit fragile.


Or am I out of my mind here? It wouldn’t be the first time.


 

SFBG Radio: Egypt and the Internet

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Protests erupting all over Egypt as democracy comes to life in North Africa — and the government’s response is to shut off the internet. Could that happen here? Johnny thinks Tim is just a delusional conspiracy nut. Check it out after the jump.

sfbgradio1282010 by endorsements2010

Obama can’t “win” the future

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Most of the pundits in the center, like the New York Times, liked Obama’s State of the Union Speech. And for good reason: It was a centrist, cautious speech that promised lower corporate taxes, conservative education policy, lots of money for the military and cuts for everyone else. Two things, thought, that stood out for me:


1. Obama still believes in government. He made it very clear that he thinks the public sector has an important role to play, not just in regulation but in spurring and stimulating economic growth. He’s going about it all wrong, but he did remind people that government — the public sector — won the space race, gave birth to the internet, built the interstate highway system and in the process created tens of millions of jobs. The GOP is already going batshit about it; they got the message.


2. The crux of the speech, the “Sputnik Moment,” was this line: “To win the future, we’ll have to take on challenges that have been decades in the making.” Win the future. In fact, over and over, all night, we heard about “winning the future.”


But since when was the future a war, something to be fought with an enemy? To “win” the space race we had to “beat” the Soviets, which we did (ha ha, we got to the moon first). To “win” the future, do we have to beat someone else? The Russians aren’t up for winning much of anything these days, but Obama seems concerned about competing with China; do the Chinese have to “lose” the future for us to “win?”


It wasn’t a random choice of words. The White House speechwriters take this stuff very seriously. “Winning the future” is a catchphrase that the Obama administration wants to be attached to. And it’s a bad one.


The future of the planet can’t be about winning. When you look at the serious crisis facing the world — climate change that’s going to transform agriculture, put the homes of hundreds of millions of people under water and alter the way every single human being lives — beating China isn’t really relevant. Thomas Friedman says the world is flat, and he’s got a point — if Obama were able to articulate a message of cooperation, of seeking peace and working together with other nations, it would have been a remarkable speech.


Instead: Winning the future. What a loser.


 


 

5 best, most deeply embarrassing ways to find a date

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They say that internet dating thing really works — especially if you’re a white male. But in the rush to OkCupid our lonely nights away, we may have missed a step. If you’re going for the artificially-constructed meet-and-greet, you may as well do it in person, right? Maximum awkwardness! That’s what the slew of alterna-dating events that are giggling and cautiously offering to buy you a drink this VD season are promising (no glove no love!). Below, five of the hipper – bikes! books! –options for those looking to be paired off before this warm snap ends and we all go back to our dens.

 

Literary Speed Dating

Finally, the library is doing something about your romantic travails! The public institution is freeing up from its mission to educate and entertain to host this book lover’s mix-and-mingle speed round. Singles in their twenties and thirties will get four to five minutes to biblio-chat about their fave bindings – books they hated, loved, or wanna bring up as a conversational flashpoint. 

Straight dates: Tues/1 5:45 – 7:45 p.m., free

LGBTQ dates: Weds/2 5:45 – 7:45 p.m., free

Pre-registration suggested

Main Library 

100 Larkin, SF

(415) 557-4400

www.sfpl.org


Love on Wheels Dating Game

Here’s an idea! Let’s pack new it-spot Public Works, put a curtain up and have singles ask each other prying questions regarding their transportational decisions in the search for love! Maybe the exhibitionism of the SF Bike Coalition’s Love on Wheels meat market-fundraiser isn’t for everybody. But it is for somebodies, and you may find love amongst the common folk audience members if you roll over to voyeur. Just hurry up if you wanna play the game, whydontcha – spots for straighties are already booked up and same sex cyclers should apply with the quickness to get on stage.

Weds/9 7 p.m., $5 for SF Bike Coalition members, $10 non-members

Public Works

161 Erie, SF

www.sfbike.org


Cupid’s Back

Because the pursuit of love is noble enough, but when you slap a healthy amount of fundraising for the queer historical society on top of your noble, your tail chase turns downright saintly! Such is this canonizing evening at Trigger, wherein those looking for someone to hold onto are pinned with a single bleeding heart with which to call upon Cupid’s help to locate love among boosters of the GLBT Historical Society. Open bar, gay community see-and-be-seen – this may just be the spot to find your new sweetie.

Fri/11 8 p.m. – midnight, $35-40

Trigger

2344 Market, SF

www.glbthistory.com


Singled Out on BART

Tie a ribbon around your ring finger (blue for menfolk, pink for womenfolk) and shoulder your messenger bag – you’re going hunting on BART today. Instead of subsisting completely on your interpretation of the odd sidelong glance, today there is an organized campaign to indicate one’s willingness to chat up a stranger on the Hallmark holiday. 

Mon/14 6 a.m. – 10 p.m., free

Bay Area BART trains

Facebook: Singled Out on BART


Queer Speed Dating

Well, Valentine’s Day has passed and what’s-his-name turned out to chew with his mouth open, so damn. Nonetheless, you have one more chance at finding love amongst the randoms. The Queer Love Connection is hosting this event as a fundraiser for Community United Against Violence, presenting a talk on “The Nueroscience of Love,” plus free food and drinks, and your chance to meet 10 different cute little things. There’s an “after-mingle” session too, so if you’re not down for a game of musical chairs come late. 

Sat/19 8 – 4 p.m., $20

Il Pirata

2007 16th St., SF

(415) 626-2626

www.cuav.org

 

Net neutrality: “The American Way”

Media Alliance, an Oakland-based organization advocating for press freedom and media access, has teamed up with San Francisco-based Bad Monkey Studios to produce a quirky cartoon about net neutrality called “The Internet You Need.”

The short film follows a December vote by the Federal Communications Commission approving a set of net neutrality rules.

Critics say those regulations fall short of what’s truly needed to maintain an even playing field for all internet users, and Media Alliance is encouraging people to write to their congressional representatives to push for stronger rules.

(There’s a broad array of opinion as to whether the FCC vote resulted in protecting an open internet, or whether it sold consumers short in favor of internet service providers.)

The Media Alliance and Bad Monkey cartoon and website seem like an attempt to make the issue accessible to those of us who aren’t technology wizards. The emphasis on soda pop and BBQ strikes us as a little weird, but sparking dialogue about net neutrality seems like a worthy goal.

Here’s the pitch from Media Alliance: “Net Neutrality really means ‘Internet Freedom.’ The freedom for you to put up what you want when you want to and have it seen equally by everyone in the world. It means what you put up has as much chance of being seen as something created by a major corporation. It’s innovation from the ground up in the truest sense. It’s the American Way.”

Hot sexy events: January 12-18

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Historically speaking, it’s good to be a geek. Think about it – has any era in history more readily rewarded those whose aptitudes shine in the areas of minutiae and social awkwardness? Thanks to the Internet, every geek has an audience – and thanks to the Internet there’s the Internet, a land where technological know-how gets you feature film bio-flicks and material fortune beyond your wildest science fiction fantasies. Basically, geeks get laid these days. Definitely prime time for Bawdy Storytelling to hold an evening of live show-and-tell entitled “Sex Wonk,” (Weds/12) wherein those who are super gungho about the old in-and-out can revel in their geekiness – and that Star Trek hand sign takes on new levels of perversion.

 

“A Penis Show”

Jack Davis crochets penis. Neither more nor less – the artist has whipped up hundreds, if not thousands of the little fellers since his first show upon graduating college. Thanks to his work, you can surround yourself with colorful, crochet cock and balls at Magnet, the free sexual health center in the Castro – take one home to make your apartment walls stand a little more erect. It’ll look great with your ’70s porn pillows!

Through Jan. 31 

Magnet 

4122 18th St., SF

(415) 581-1600

www.magnetsf.org


Bawdy Storytelling: Sex Wonk

The featured guests at this month’s sharing-is-caring story series include Sarah Dopp, eminent webmaster for the transgendered community, engineers, sex educators, and the good people from SF Sex Information, who will be on hand to answer all your pleasantly nerdy queries on boning in between the witty, touching, and downright blush-inducing stories from all the speakers. 

Weds/12 8 p.m., $10

The Blue Macaw

2565 Mission, SF

www.bawdystorytelling.com


Invasion: A Queer Takeover of the Citadel

The Citadel sheds all signs of straightness for a night: hosts Asher and Char preside over an evening of gay, lesbian, bisexual, pansexual, fag, dyke, leatherman, leatherwoman, butch, femme, transgender, transsexual, and genderqueer-styled BDSM debauchery. Added bonus: for all you cheap queers, members are invited to volunteer for an hour at the event and get in gratis.  

Fri/14 8 p.m.-1 a.m., $25 members only

SF Citadel 

1277 Mission, SF

(415) 626-2746

www.sfcitadel.org


SF Spanking Society Munch

Do you ever attend BDSM munches and feel, well, a little soft core? Is all you really want a good spank (or ass to spank)? This is the get-together for you then, cause all that’ll be on the table are the possibility of red cheeks and the probability of kinky conversation. 

Sat/15 noon-2 p.m., free

The Thirsty Bear 

661 Howard, SF

www.soj.org/calendar


Heavy Petting Zoo

Surely this month’s Kinky Salon dress-up swinger’s ball has a theme that most SF weirdos can get down on: the furry, feathery, bescaled kingdom of animalia. Everyone has some kitty cat ears or frog-hued face paint lying around the house, don’t they? And even if you don’t, you can still get your bootie on: swipe your buddy’s denim overalls and viola! You, sir, are a farm hand. Now get to milking that cow.

Sat/15 10 p.m.-late, $30-35 members only

Mission Control 

2519 Mission, SF

www.missioncontrolsf.org


Bedroom Body Moves

Y’know all those classes that are the rage with your racy Aunt Carol in Modesto, the pole dance for exercise courses? Those things are all over the place. But what the hell, why strip for the caloric exodus? Seems silly when you could instead take it all off to get your partner off, amiright? Leaving aside all questions of “staying in shape,” then, we present to you this course, which focuses on the simple act of clothes removal and its seductive powers (especially when you’re sitting on someone’s lap). 

Tues/18 6-8 p.m., $20-25

Good Vibrations

1620 Polk, SF

(415) 345-0500

www.goodvibes.com

 

On the Cheap

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On the Cheap listings are compiled by Jackie Andrews. Submit items for the listings at listings@sfbg.com. For further information on how to submit items for the listings, see Picks.

WEDNESDAY 12
How to Build Guitars Bazaar Cafe, 5927 California, SF; (415) 831-5620, www.julianagallin.com/howto. 7pm, free (food and drink purchase encouraged). Rickenbacker 12-string electric guitar lover, Mario DeSio, who began making his own damn guitars — by consulting the internet, no less — when his guitar-buying budget was slashed, will share his humble beginnings, experiences, tools, and finished (as well as unfinished) products. Afterwards, you may not be able to add “luthier” to your resume, but maybe you’ll become inspired by this DIY night.

THURSDAY 13
“The Journey That Saved Curious George” Contemporary Jewish Museum, 736 Mission, SF; (415) 655-7800, www.thecjm.org. 7pm, free with regular museum admission or $5 after 5pm. Experience the stranger-than-fiction journey of Margaret and H.A. Rey, the creators of Curious George, as they escape Paris from the Nazis on homemade bicycles, take a train ride across Europe, and finally a boat to America. Louise Borden, who wrote the book Curious George Saves the Day: The Art of Margaret and H.A. Rey, tells the story with an illustrated discussion and a book signing to follow — after which you will surely want to cuddle up with a sweetheart and read Curious George by the fire, er, space heater.

FRIDAY 14
Bitches Brew Park Life, 220 Clement, SF; (415) 386-7275, www.parklifestore.com. 7pm, free. A good art opening is always a great alternative to spending wads of cash on a Friday night. The possibilities of free or cheap booze and cool stuff always aim to please, and when there’s a rad band thrown in to the mix, you can’t go wrong. This Friday, check out new works from Kelly Tunstall, Marci Washington, Aiyana Udesen, Hellen Jo, and Rebecca Ebeling with special musical performance by Oakland’s Wax Idols

SATURDAY 15
Queer Porn TV Launch Party Lexington Club, 3464 19th St., SF; (415) 863-2052, www.lexingtonclub.com. 9pm, free plus with drink purchase. Celebrate the launch of QueerPorn.TV, a new queer porn site, with drinks, dancing, and general all-around debauchery. Hosted by queer porn icon Courtney Trouble and porn star Tina Horn. DJs Booty Klap (Party Hole) and Jean Jamz (Party Hole, Ships In The Night) will getcha rumps shakin’, and a special performance from porn star Maggie Mayhem should no doubt be the icing on the proverbial cake.

SUNDAY 16
Scott Alexander solo performance RockIt Room, 406 Clement, SF, (415) 387-6343, www.rock-it-room.com. 8pm, free. Brooklyn expatriate Scott Alexander, a.k.a. “Cookie Man,” is that guy you may have seen recently around town hanging out on an inflatable couch while passing out free cookies. Well, he’s a Californian now and wants to make friends – and to do that he will be singing songs, passing out more cookies and, oh yes, bacon. All bases are covered here guys, regardless of whether your thing is off-beat, comedic pop music, cruelty-free baked goods, or fried pig ass.

MONDAY 17
MLK Day of Service Contemporary Jewish Museum, 736 Mission, SF; (415) 752-2483,  www.thecjm.org, www.norcalmlk.org/2011. 11am – 5pm (art poem activity from 1-3pm), free. Yerba Buena Center for the Arts and Yerba Buena Gardens’ sponsor a day of egalitarian activities: a march starting from the park’s MLK memorial, a fair offering free family health services, a children’s reading festival, and the Contemporary Jewish Museum will be open free to the public. Whew! See website for events schedule.

MoAD MLK Day Celebration Museum of the African Diaspora, 685 Mission, SF; (415) 358-7200, www.moadsf.org, www.norcalmlk.org/2011. 11am-6pm, free. MoAD invites the public to enjoy a day at the museum free of charge – and to celebrate MLK’s dream, they’ve got a full slate of community-empowering activities planned. There’s a college fair of historically African-American schools from around the country, live Afro-Cuban music, chalk drawing outside the museum, MLK film screenings, and even a live jewelry-making demonstration and sale. See website for events schedule.

Bend over the rainbow

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marke@sfbg.com

SEX/TV “We get to shoot all over San Francisco,” Jack Shamama of NakedSword.com tells me over the phone, a wicked lilt tiptoeing into his voice. “How great is that?”

Double entendres! He’s referring to Golden Gate, the spunky episodic porn Web series he wrote with Michael Stabile, which just wrapped up its first season and will begin a second season in February. The weekly series runs on the Naked Sword site, with a new episode debuting every week to a substantial viewership that values glossy production and polished presentation.

Although there’s no grand soap opera-like family tree of intersecting characters and storylines, each episode does feature quite a bit of plot, at least by wank-flick standards, and solid back stories for the various players. (Sample: “Robert is an unemployed writer who spends his days at cafes. He’s got a real interest in humanity, and is garrulous and friendly. He’s almost always dressed casually. Robert lives in the grittier Castro-adjacent neighborhood of the Lower Haight.” Robert gets crammed full of a two-foot-long cone-shaped black dildo. But I digress.)

GOLDEN GATE TRAILER (er, NSFW)

Pornisodic series have been done before — the sprawling Wet Palms comes to mind — but this is the first that really focuses on San Francisco. Shamama and Stabile being our perennial enfants terribles of porn, there’s some fun with San Francisco archetypes in each episode as well, bringing together, say, a high-powered downtown investor with a struggling Mission District artist who pimps himself out online for rent money. And while there are a few problems with verisimilitude (that struggling artist has waxed eyebrows and an all-over tan), there are plenty of spot-on in-jokes. In one episode, a couple of almost-hipster rockers get approached by a groupie for sex — but first they hand him a flyer for their band’s show at Bottom of the Hill.

After we dished a bit about the scheduling woes of porn stars in the Internet Age and the purported whereabouts of 1990s bear porn pioneer Steve “Titpig” Hurley, I asked Shamama a few questions about Golden Gate.

SFBG What pricked you into Golden Gate action?

Jack Shamama In the past, Naked Sword has teamed up with partners to produce hardcore content, behind-the-scenes specials, porn event coverage, and our regular talk show, “The Tim and Roma Show.” But for our first completely in-house production, we knew we had to come up with something big that wouldn’t run out of steam, since we wanted it to be a weekly series. The concept that kept coming up was the city itself.

Gay porn was pretty much invented in San Francisco and even today maybe as much as 75 percent of it is still filmed here, but you really wouldn’t know it since most of it’s filmed on sets. Those movies that do spotlight San Francisco generally end up giving people a dumbed-down CliffsNotes “gay Disneyland” version of SF, with an opening shot of the Golden Gate Bridge and credits rolling over a shot of the giant rainbow flag in the Castro.

We figured we owed San Francisco a bit more than that. Our tagline is “Enter the land of impulse and desire.” The city ends up being sort of like the main character. For each episode, we bring together two opposing types of San Francisco men to show the different sides of the city.

SFBG Everyone talks about how major porn studios are being killed by amateur websites. But you guys are going in the opposite direction, with glossy production values, old-fashioned plot-oriented scenes, big name stars, and timed release dates …  

JS Golden Gate is definitely an anomaly in the porn marketplace — but I think that at this point, its uniqueness is a plus. There’s still a huge audience out there that wants this type of meticulously produced, quality product, and I don’t think they should be ignored just because there are other types of porn being made.

Many people automatically equate “amateur” with “plotless” — but really it’s the same plot over and over again. “Straight guy sucks his first dick” could describe seven-eighths of amateur porn. That can be hot but yeah, we get it. We want to explore other kinds of fantasy. And, along with our executive producer Tim Valenti, we want to do it in a quality way. Even though our actors get down and dirty, we’re not ashamed of having a little class.

SFBG How difficult is it to produce a weekly porn series?  

JS It can get tough to write episodes at that pace and to keep everything straight — scouting locations, shooting stills, scheduling stars. One challenging aspect to production I didn’t anticipate was finding filming locations. Since each episode takes places in a different neighborhood, it’s taking us out of our comfort zone. There are lots of guys who live in the Castro who want to have a gay porn shot in their apartment, but some other neighborhoods can be tricky. We’ve lucked out and been able to shoot in some amazing apartments so far, though. I really didn’t expect it to become real estate porn, but I don’t think anyone’s complaining.

Another thing is making sure our script is malleable enough to adapt to the actors and direction. We shoot the sex part before the scripted part, so the actors won’t get too bored. And even though in our scripts Mike and I try to go beyond just clichéd “fuck me harders” during the sex parts, when it comes down to it, we want our actors to have hot sex, not worry about delivering their lines. And we want our director, Chris Ward, to be free to match his sexual vision to our scripted intentions. He’s one of the biggest names in porn — no one tells Chris Ward how to film a sex scene. He’s incredible.

SFBG Any hot scenarios you can share from the upcoming season?

JS A pair of Mormon missionaries don’t quite know what they’re getting into when they knock on the door of a certain fetishy Alamo Square leather daddy. That one ought to be fun.

The 2010 Lamebow Awards

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marke@sfbg.com

I’m sorry. I was totally going to rundown all the most drag-queen-slappingiest moments of the incredibly homo-fixated year that was 2010. But then I thought, “Wait a minute! If I know so much about the gays, doesn’t that mean people will know that I’m gay? I can’t possibly come out — I don’t even have a book deal yet! Goddess damn you, Ricky Martin, for setting the bar so high. Nor do I have a book deal AND an autobiographical country record release date! Gee thanks, Chely Wright! (But also, thank you for one-upping Ms. Martin.)”

Anyway, that was a really long thought for me. So let’s just award those two a couple of nice, shiny, Degeneres-shaped 2010 Lamebows for Best Commercial Coming Out and move on. I’m queer, I’m here, I don’t have an agent, oh well. Speaking of commercial outings, let’s lob a Lamebow, too, at Richard Chamberlain, who helped pioneer the apparently lucrative form in 2003 with his autobiography Shattered Love (!). In December, he warned famous actors to stay in the closet because of persistent Hollywood homophobia. Way to monopolize, Dicky! Also: did you know that the most flamboyant cast member of Will and Grace is light and loafy? Shocking. A Lamebow to you, Sean Hayes, for coming out this year and finally putting our frantic speculation to rest at last.

The year 2010 was also when we learned that it only took six horrific teen suicides being reported in one month to remind old gay people that there are young gay people, and that being a young gay person is pretty damn tough. I have no idea how old gay people forgot this, considering several of them must have been young once, but I suspect something involving tiny dogs and/or tribal tattoos. Our major response to deadly homophobic bullying? Just deal with it, twerps. Sure, the “It Gets Better” campaign was wonderful as a high school survivor support group, a risk-free youth outreach effort, and proof that us olds knew how to work the YouTube. But the underlying message — “Don’t bother trying to change the world. One day you can move somewhere you’ll feel normal like us!” — was awfully regressive. We didn’t even have to leave the comfort of the Internet to feel like we did a little something. Shoulder pat! Still, like the obituaries, it was a rare chance to hear non-celebrity gay people’s personal stories, so there’s that.

Finally, a big, sparkly Lamebow must be parachuted in to the numbskulls who thought repealing “don’t ask, don’t tell” was such a splendid idea. Yes, I feel sorry for people who have to lie to serve. And I’m not pissed off because now my hot gay ass can get drafted. I love Canada, it’s full of bears. No, I’m pissed because the successful repeal has probably ruined gay military porn forever. Look, there’s a very good reason why no porn is set in foofy gay bars with a tranny lipsyncing Lady Gaga in the background. Gays only like gay porn that has next to zero possibility of actual gay-acting people appearing in it. Now I have to worry that I’ll pop in my copy of Assghanistan: Taking Kabul by the Horns or Packin’ Stan: Assghanistan II and some Mary in fatigues will prance out a Katy Perry number with her bunkmates, sigh. Thanks a lot, America.

Moya

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paulr@sfbg.com

DINE Many of the city’s Ethiopian restaurants are to be found in the Western Addition (on or near Divisadero Street) and in the Inner Sunset, so to find one, Moya, blooming in SoMa is an unexpected pleasure. The rush of Internet Age money into the neighborhoods south of Market Street in recent years has been a fast-rising tide that can be said to have lifted all boats only if by boats we mean yachts. But if by boats we mean boats, then some swamping has occurred. The area isn’t yet devoid of modest, high-value restaurants, but the trend has bent strongly in the direction of pricey new places, from Prospect in the east to Bar Agricole in the once-forlorn west.

The foods of Ethiopia seem a little underappreciated on these shores. The cooking is as gratifyingly spiced as that from the other side of the Indian Ocean. But while Indian cuisine has found a sort of vogue here, perhaps because of the influx of so many software engineers, Ethiopian cuisine has not.

Yet neglect isn’t always and entirely a bad thing. It can help preserve a certain integrity and authenticity. At Moya (which opened last summer), the look is big-city modern, with high ceilings, a floor handsomely laid with rough tiles the color of sandstone, and walls washed with a butter color. The place looks fresh and clean, and the kitchen is half out in the open, which lends a reassuring transparency to things. There is nothing quite like being able to see the people who make your food actually making it.

But at heart, it’s very much a mom-is-cooking operation. The ayb, a kind of cottage cheese, is house-made according to a family recipe. You can order the cheese as a side, for $4, and it’s also served with the kitfo ($14), a kind of spicy, tataki-ized steak tartare — steak tartake? More on the beef in a moment, but as for the cheese: it was more creamy than chunky, almost like a relation of mascarpone but with a fresh sourness that led me to ask our server whether lemon juice had been substituted for rennet as the curdling agent. The answer was indefinite, which might mean I hadn’t put the question clearly or had stumbled on a trade secret. But the cheese did strongly remind me of a simple fresh white cheese I’ve sometimes made myself (using lemon juice squeezed into scalded milk) for the Indian spinach dish saag paneer.

The other lovely element of sourness in the food involves injera, the bread (made from a grain called teff,) that resembles a cross between sponge cake and sourdough. You could make a savory bûche de Noël from it. At Moya. as at all the Ethiopian and Eritrean places I’ve been to, injera is ubiquitous, whether laid out as a kind of mat for other items to rest on; rolled up like fresh lavash and set beside a rounded cone of green lentils — azifa ($5) — strongly seasoned with red onions, garlic, lemon, chilis, and olive oil or torn up and tossed with tomatoes, green peppers, onions, and a garlicky vinaigrette for ye timatim fit fit ($4), a sort of east African panzanella.

The kitchen’s seasoning hand is a robust one, whether the animating ingredient is garlic (the ye timatim fit fit should come with a whole coffee bean or two for each diner, to chew away garlic breath, which becomes particularly lethal the morning after), or hot pepper. We were consulted on how hot we wanted the kitfo and ye doro tibs ($12), chunks of boneless chicken sautéed in clarified butter with berberé, (the traditional Ethiopian chili powder), onions, garlic, tomato, and herbs. When told that hot was quite hot, we said medium and hoped for the best. But medium turned out to be what most places would call hot. I like spicy food, and I found the tingling afterglow of the berberé to be a distinct pleasure. But mild wouldn’t be a bad default choice for those in doubt.

As is customary, the main courses were piled together onto a platter lined with injera, and a well-dressed chopped salad dotted with tomato quarters were heaped at either end. The salad was both decorative and cooling, while the injera rug, of course, was ripped to shreds that served as little finger-operated grabbing devices. The atavistic satisfaction of tearing something up and then eating it reminds us of how close to being uncivilized we are, really, even in such civilized surroundings.

MOYA

Dinner: nightly, 5–9 p.m.

Lunch: Mon.–Fri., 11:30 a.m.–3 p.m.; Sat., noon–3 p.m.

1044 Folsom, SF

(415) 431-5544

www.eatmoya.com

No alcohol

Cash only

Not particularly noisy

Wheelchair accessible

Rate irate

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arts@sfbg.com

YEAR IN FILM “Bloody bugger to you, you … beastly bastard. Shit. Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit. F-fornication. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck and fuck. Fuck, fuck, and bugger. Bugger, bugger, buggety buggety buggety fuck. Fuck ass. Balls! Balls! Fuckety shit. Shit, fuck and willy. Willy, shit and fuck, and … tits.”

The above is, in toto, the reason why The King’s Speech — a movie that might very well turn out Oscar’s idea of this year’s Best Picture next February — is rated R. This childish explosion of potty-mouth is coaxed from England’s future king (Colin Firth) by his speech therapist (Geoffrey Rush) to demonstrate that the former’s crippling stammer flies away whenever he’s unself-consciousness enough to cuss a bit. It’s a comic moment (one of few, and perhaps the film’s highlight in general) that, by reducing the words to sniggering playground naughtiness — this king is, after all, in a state of arrested development — robs them of any genuine scatology or shock value. They’re just words.

But those words (give or take a few fucks and shits — only the MPAA can or would bother to count every rapid-fire cuss) were still enough to get this otherwise very chaste, polite Masterpiece Theatre exercise classified with Saw 3D and The Human Centipede as viewable by minors only with parental accompaniment. Not that many teens are likely to be lining up for The King’s Speech — certainly far fewer than saw Saw 3D with or without adult chaperoning. But really, this is what they need protecting from?

This was a year in which the usual grousing undercurrent about arbitrary ratings-board standards started to seep overground. There were small hubbubs about two excellent documentaries, The Tillman Story and A Film Unfinished, getting R’s due to cursing on one hand and nudity (among Nazi concentration camp inmates) on the other. In both cases prudishness means these searing indictments of historical wrongs probably can’t be used for classroom educational purposes.

A larger controversy surrounded Blue Valentine, the acclaimed indie feature slapped with an NC-17 for a sex scene so subversive that no one who saw the film at Sundance could recall it; the MPAA rating mystified many. Turns out the scene in question is a happy flashback in this slow-agonizing-death-of-a marriage portrait, with Michelle Williams’ thrusty body language expressing clear enjoyment of Ryan Gosling’s mouthy activities downtown. Nonetheless, there’s nothing more explicit displayed than the outside of her thighs — as one colleague put it, “I’ve seen more of Britney Spears on the Internet.” The drama’s sobriety and its awards momentum finally won a rare MPAA reversal on appeal, reducing its rating to R.

But the case still underlines the injustice of our current system. As Kirby Dick’s This Film Is Not Yet Rated pointed out in 2006, as a tool of the Hollywood mainstream the MPAA routinely judges independent films more harshly than major studio releases. It also exercises double standards when it comes to gender nudity and gender-preference sexuality, and most crucially continues to heighten the American morality gap between depictions of sex and violence.

These complaints have prompted some vague hints of change afoot, albeit more toward hitting torture-porn horror harder than lightening up on the birds ‘n’ bees. In any case, it’s difficult to be very hopeful: for every progressive cultural step forward these days, there seem to be two Tea Party dance-steps back. It was announced earlier this month that Christian pastor and cable honcho Robert H. Schuller had contracted to broadcast G-rated versions of movies like the original Alien (1979) and Predator (1987). OK, so they’ll have bad language and explicit violence removed; but even these eviscerated edits will still offer entertainment predicated on the horrific (if now nongraphically suggested) murders of humans by icky monsters. Giving kids nightmares is more godly (and provides a more “positive message,” per the Rev. Schuller) than showing them (God forbid) a nipple.

Such hypocrisies run rampant in U.S. entertainment and society in general. Media outlets generally refuse to advertise NC-17 films, giving them and their modicum of sexual explicitness the commercial kiss of death while most kids freely access porn online. Screen violence grows ever more desensitizing; explosions of cars, buildings, entire cities, or planets are viewed as harmless while anything truly unpleasant enough to act as a deterrent sparks outrage. (By now the escapist Saw and Hostel movies get shrugged at, whereas the recent Killer Inside Me remake offended many because its protracted scenes of domestic violence were realistically painful to watch.)

Penises are now OK in small doses, albeit only in the clownish contexts of Forgetting Sarah Marshall (2008), Observe and Report (2009), etc. Ironically, any time sex is taken seriously, sans juvenile humor or lurid “erotic-thriller” type judgment, it becomes unfit for allegedly innocent eyes. Blue Valentine‘s good sex, and subsequent bad breakup sex, disturbs the MPAA because it is all too real-world relatable in both its pleasure and fallibility, something you won’t often find in porn, either.

The logic gap grows ever more ridiculous even as our culture wars’ battle lines harden. Imagine a Palin White House two years hence, presiding over a land in which sex education is nonexistent, abstinence clubs are the new Honor Society, and teenage pregnancy rates skyrocket. When in doubt as to the nation’s course, say grace, then settle down to dinner with the kids as you watch a “clean” tube edit of something like 1995’s Braveheart, its medieval spears through the chest trimmed but that humorous throwing of a prince’s homosexual BFF from the castle tower left intact. Then drift off to slumberland, family values affirmed.