Feast Spring 2013

FEAST: 5 stoner cookbooks

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culture@sfbg.com

FEAST If that joint’s got you jonesin’ for some serious grub, look no further. We’ve rolled up the latest and greatest in stoner cookbooks, perfect for any discerning bud lover’s taste test. No, we didn’t include any weed-infused recipes in this list, but hey, feel free to augment the recipes in the brownie cookbook. Whether you’re a marathon midnight toker or a one hitter-and-quitter, we understand your need for accessibility, availability, and general ease in eating after that smoke sesh. But move beyond Pop Tarts — even the most gourmand of pot heads could use some guidelines for grilling up goodies every once in awhile.

THE MAC AND CHEESE COOKBOOK BY ALLISON AREVALO AND ERIN WADE

Get your mac on. Allison Areval and Erin Wade, co-owners and authors of The Mac and Cheese Cookbook dish out 117 pages dedicated to one of America’s most beloved dishes, based on the crowd pleasing specialties dished up in their Oakland restaurant Homeroom. The book is an homage to Homeroom’s endless variations on the classic orange variety. That’s good news if your cravings leave you hankering for a variety of tastes. Basic bechamel sauces figure on the pages alongside smoky bacon, blue cheese, sriracha, and jalapeno poppers. There’s even a section on desserts suitable for your post-mac munch.

Ten Speed Press, $16.99

FIFTY SHADES OF BACON BY JENNA JOHNSON AND BEN MYHRE

This self-proclaimed “erotic” cookbook sinks its teeth into all things bacon. Bacon au gratin, bacon-wrapped asparagus, bacon Alfredo (just to name a few) — this pork-inspired parody cookbook has all the seductive appeal of its sexy, silly source material. But instead of a half baked S&M narrative, Johnson and Myhre’s book gets you off with five different carnivorous sections of easy-to-follow recipes. A seductive succession of events unfolds with chapters entitled “Foreplay,” “Multiple Orgasms,” “Morning Wood,” and “Bondage”, where bacon bits, bacon jam, bacon martinis, and bacon peanut stoke your stoner flames. And even if pig parts don’t get you off, they’ll almost certainly taste better when you’re high.

CreateSpace Independent Publishing Platform, $19.95

TRY THIS AT HOME: RECIPES FROM MY HEAD TO YOUR PLATE BY RICHARD BLAIS

We’ve all done it. Remember that time when you were so high, you thought putting chocolate sauce on canned jalapeños was the most genius concept ever? Until, of course, you made that dream reality and were left with a wounded mouth and sobering regret. It turns out, however, that unlikely pairings aren’t always painful. Top Chef: All Stars winner Richard Blais proves it to us in this cookbook. From root-beer basted lamb-shanks to coffee butter pancakes, the chef’s recipes do flavor exploration the right way — 125 right ways, to be precise. Go forth and concoct creatively.

Clarkson Potter Publishers, $30

MAD HUNGRY CRAVINGS BY LUCINDA SCALA QUINN

Lucinda Scala Quinn takes on take-out. Her mission in Mad Hungry Cravings is to reconcile the almost unbeatable deliciousness of fast food with the nourishment and nutrition that a home kitchen can produce, without a lot of work. Can good for you also be good for munchies? Damn straight. While raising three boys in NYC, where street food beats about anything found in the fridge (particularly if you’re a ravenous adolescent), Quinn had to create home-cooked meals capable of competition with street dogs and shawarmas.

Artisan, $27.95

BRILLIANT BROWNIES AND BARS: 25 FAVORITE BROWNIE AND BAR RECIPES BY COOKING PENGUIN

Stoners, perhaps more than most, know that not all brownies are created equal. If you have ever tried to make a batch of brownies with your favorite herb, you know it requires a careful balance of elements and timing. This book’s sugary-sweet offerings are winners, and recipes are composed with chocolate and without for more innovative pastry pleasure. The pages start with the standards and segue into non-traditional options, like cocoa-avocado, pumpkin pie, and nonpareil brownies. If you’d rather stick to the classics, try whipping up chocolate walnut brownies or Cooking Penguin’s ace pecan blondies.

168 Publishing, $12.95

FEAST: Fave leaves

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What to do when printing the news and raising hell leaves you with an appetite for healthy greens? Let the Guardian staff guide your salad steps.

SLANTED DOOR’S GRAPEFRUIT AND JICAMA SALAD

Can a salad be declared a cult classic? Mention the Slanted Door to a veggie-loving type and inevitably, the grapefruit and jicama Salad is the first thing off his or her lips. It’s so popular it’s on the lunch menu, the dinner menu, and is offered for takeaway or casual noshing at Out the Door, next to the Ferry Building restaurant. Since when do people go to a fancy, critically-beloved restaurant serving all manner of Vietnamese cuisine and walk out raving about a humble salad? And maybe go back the next day ’round noon for the to-go version? Since Chef Charles Phan created this mélange of grapefruit, jicama, red cabbage, pickled carrots, and candied pecans, apparently. (Cheryl Eddy)

1 Ferry Building, No. 3, SF. www.slanteddoor.com

HARD KNOX CAFÉ’S BLACKENED SHRIMP SALAD

Peruse the soul food offerings at San Francisco’s mouthwatering Hard Knox Cafe and you will likely be tempted to go all-in. Three-piece fried chicken? BBQ pork spareribs? Mac ‘n’ cheese? You could go there. Or, you could exit this delightful Southern homestyle-cooking establishment without plunging into a food coma directly afterward. Go with the blackened shrimp salad and you won’t be disappointed. The shrimp is cooked to tender perfection and coated in delicious Cajun seasoning with just enough bite. Paired with mixed greens, iceberg lettuce, tomatoes, mushrooms, red onions, and slivers of pepperoncini, we recommend trying it with the vinaigrette dressing. The waitress told us the salad has changed up a bit from the way they used to make it, so you may have to adjust if it’s already an old favorite. (Rebecca Bowe)

2526 Third Street, SF. 448 Clement Street, SF. www.hardknoxcafe.com

CHA CHA CHA’S WARM SPINACH SALAD

This isn’t the salad to order when you’re looking to cut back on calories, but goddamn it is good. Pretty much all of Cha Cha Cha’s New World cuisine gets five stars in my book, but just the thought of its warm spinach salad is enough to make me drool. The dish consists of thick bacon chunks, bits of mushroom, and green onion tossed in a warm Dijon mustard-sherry wine cream dressing. The dressing is cool enough to keep the leaves from wilting and warm enough to encourage you to dig in while it’s hot. (Cortney Clift)

1801 Haight, SF. 2327 Mission, SF. www.cha3.com

THE PLANT’S DINO KALE SALAD

Dino kale is all the rage. And why shouldn’t it be? It’s a hearty, richly-vitamin-packed dark leafy green. Plus, it has the word “dino” in it, which gives it a super cool edge. Likewise, the Plant Cafe, with locations at the Embarcadero, Financial District, and Marina, is known for a more decadent, and thus more exciting, take on the healthier side of lunch. Put those together, and you get the delicious, vegan, and gluten-free dino kale salad, with the aforementioned leafy green, avocado, red quinoa, almonds, cucumbers, tomato, and a fresh and tangy lemon cumin vinaigrette — that cumin packs the wallop. It’s the dish a Yelper recently described as the “best salad on earth.” I’m not about to disagree. (Emily Savage)

Various SF locations. www.theplantcafe.com

 

FEAST: Adventures in crabbing

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brooke@bayguardian.com

FEAST I’ll admit, the prospect of DIY crabbing during our Bodega Bay camping trip was enough to give me pause. But the thought of a pot full of freshly caught crabs cooking over a campfire was enough to kick off a quest to add “amateur crabber” to my resume.

Taking a cue from our stomachs, my camping crew did some research. We needed advice and supplies, and a single trip to the Outer Richmond yielded both.

The owners of Gus’ Discount Fishing Tackle were happy to help some flailing first-time crabber, and outfitted my group with a circular crabbing net, rope, bait bag, and crab measuring gauge. Since we were venturing outside the city for our quarry, we opted to buy bait closer to our crabbing site (the better to avoid a fish-scented car.) Upon our arrival in Bodega Bay, we headed to Diekmann’s Bay Store for frozen mackerel and squid (for the crabs) and deli sandwiches (for the humans.)

Well armed, we made our way to the rock jetty that stretches past the harbor in Bodega Bay’s Doran Park. We picked out a sunny, unoccupied stretch of rock, chopped up some mackerel — the bloodier the better, we were advised, since crabs hunt with their noses — zip-tied our bait bag to the bottom of the net, and tossed it into the bay. Then we got busy chatting, snacking, and getting tips from other crabbers. (One entrepreneurial crab hunter suggested using a barely-open can of cat food as bait, but we stuck with the mackerel and squid to preserve the natural order of things.)

Every 20 minutes or so, we pulled our net in to see if it had snagged any crustacean treasures. We didn’t have much luck snagging specimens that met California Department of Fish and Wildlife size requirements — 5.75 inches for Dungeness (in season until June 30th), four inches for rock and red crabs (in season yearround.) We successfully netted one beefy Dungeness and one rock crab.

One of our neighbors (not the cat food guy) was a little more lucky, and managed to pull in what seemed like buckets of crabs. We begged for tips, but he was using the same trap and same bait that we were. We decided that staking out a good spot on the jetty was everything when it came to crabbing, and noted that many of our more-experienced peers took a more mobile approach to the hunt.

And then: seals. When the other crabbers saw them, they began to pack up and leave. We thought they were cute.

Pro crabbing tip: seals are not cute. If they arrive while your net is submerged, they are most likely after your bait and you are done crabbing for the day. If you stick around, you’d better be OK with your bait cage being dismantled by their nimble maws or losing your bait bag entirely. Or both.

When one of the seals was beelined for our net, we moved to the opposite side of the jetty, but to no avail. Five minutes later, it resurfaced, bait bag in mouth. To the excitement of a pack of squawking seagulls, the seal ripped it open and devoured its contents — the last of our bait.

Bait bag decimated, dreams of crab feast crushed, we headed home with the two crabbies we’d managed to catch.

They were delicious.

 

GUS’ DISCOUNT FISHING TACKLE

3710 Balboa, SF

(415) 752-6197

www.gusdiscounttackle.com

 

DIEKMANN’S BAY STORE

1275 Highway 1, Bodega Bay

(707) 875-3517

www.diekmannsbaystore.com

 

DORAN PARK

201 Doran Beach Road, Bodega Bay

Day use: open 7am to sunset; $7 per vehicle

Campsite: check-in 2pm, check-out 12pm; $26–$32 per campsite

(707) 875-3540