Perfecting the slap and tingle of a proper spank

Pub date September 2, 2011
SectionSex Blog

The traditional open-handed spank is quintessential in its own right, but a good ripe slap on the rump is only level one. For anyone interested in upping their BDSM ante, spanking is the perfect gateway drug to a world of slapping, whacking, and tapping, all easily played in your preferred pain bracket, from tickle to squeal, with hand or cane. If you’re unsure of these options, need direction or just want to watch a hour of spanking demos, local sex-positive kink-geek Kitty Stryker promises to school you in all things spank.

The spanking play-shop happens Saturday as pre-game to Threshold, Mission Control‘s “fungeon” party, a more playful take on the usual sex shindig, mixing rough sex with art, spunk and lots of toys. Although most of the attendees will probably know a fair amount about giving and taking a good thrashing, Ms. Stryker plans to intrigue her class with suggesting some of her favorites and creative approaches to a seemingly simple act. “So maybe you’ve done spanking, barehanded, but maybe you haven’t thought about wearing latex gloves or punching,” she says.

Kitty Stryker is all up in the San Francisco kink scene and has her claws in a variety of roles, from sex work to sex education, but she doesn’t necessarily consider herself a ‘professional spanker,’ regardless of how lovely the title might look on a business card. 

“I wouldn’t say I’m a pro-spanker, but as a professional top, spanking is among the things I do. I’m more of a spank aficionado,” she clarifies. “I find myself saying, ‘ooh I like the quality of that wood’ or ‘ooh, these leather gloves’ and thinking about how I could use the materials with my bag of tricks.” 



A passing construction worker begged for a spank during Kitty’s photoshoot and she let him have it. Photo by BrodyQat

Kitty’s literal bag of tricks will join her for the class and she’s prepared to wind-up with paddles, canes, and even some sort of horse bridle accessory, which she says is a bit like a carpet beater. Her most important accessory is, of course, a good bottom. First things first: “I found myself a cute demo bottom and we’re in the process of negotiating what we can do together.” Learning what your partner wants should always be top priority. Kitty suggests making the conversation into a fun confessional: What’s your pain threshold? Do you like stingy sensations? Play a game of 20 questions and everyone will win.

“All these implements create such different feelings and it’s critical that you know what your partner likes. If someone only likes thuddy pain and you’re using a thin rod, it’s not going to work out well for you guys.”


Kitty paddling a chick. Photo by Leng Montgomery. 

Accessories aside, Kitty hopes to get people thinking about spanking possibilities beyond the bottom. The body has a whole lot of places prime for a smack, but they’re often overlooked. Some of her favorites? The soles of the feet and palms– high five anyone? Kitty must have a secret. Luckily she’s willing to share.



Sat/3, 9 p.m.,  $30

Mission Control

2519 Mission, SF