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This morning my Muni driver told me to get a car

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By Paula Connelly

When I saw that it was rainy this morning at 8:00AM I decided to take the 48 Quintara line bus rather than walk, as I usually do. After waiting just shy of an hour for the bus, two arrived at the same time and half way through the ride the less crowded one reached a spontaneous end-of-the-line. When my bus driver told me that I should run if I want to catch the first bus, I explained why that was bothersome. She told me, “Get a car.” Et tu, bus driver?? I have been a city girl my whole life, never had a car, and don’t plan on getting one.
After the recent i880 accident, Muni should not only be encouraging people to ride, they should be demonstrating all the viability of the option to take public transportation. That’s just bad marketing. It took me twice as long to get to work as it would had I walked. That’s an hour and a half commute for 2.7 miles. When dealing with any large, diverse group of people, you can expect complications. But just about once a month, the frequency with which I take public transportation to work, my fervor for walking is reaffirmed by a similar experience. I can’t trust Muni when even it’s employees have lost faith in it’s reliability. Wet socks are a bargain for my sanity.

Dem Con: Final (maybe) thoughts

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By Tim Redmond

You can scroll down a bit and see all of my observations from the state Democratic Convention in San Diego, but now that I’m back, a few last thoughts (until I have more last thoughts):

The most bizarre statement by a major candidate: Hillary Clinton saying that we need to bring illegal immigrants “out of the shadows” — so we can track them in case they’re terrorists.

The most startling fact: Unless I missed something, John Edwards was the only major presidential candidate who mentioned the word “poverty.”

Worst sense of history: Assembly speaker Fabian Nunez calling the era of the Clinton presidency “the golden years.”

Loser: Hillary Clinton, who started off great but lost the crowd, and got heckled, when she timidly got into Iraq. .

Disappointment: Barack Obama, who came in like a rock star, spoke brilliantly,was great on the war, but offered few specifics and didn’t stop to talk to the press.

Winner: John Edwards didn’t get to speak until Sunday morning, but I agree with Paul Hogarth: He turned around more delegates than anyone else.

Best speech: hands down, Maxine Waters

Lessons: The bloggers and reform upstarts got their asses kicked by the old guard on some key resolutions. But these folks learn fast, and they’ll be back.

Critical Mass

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For commentary and images from last night’s Critical Mass, check the Guardian’s San Francisco.

Images from Critical Mass

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By Tim Daw
teedaw@hotmail.com

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Political Theater, huh?

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President Bush staging political theater in May 2003
While President Bush whines about political theater, presidential candidate Barack Obama points out that ending the war in Iraq is just one signature away
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Oui, senor

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By Molly Freedenberg

mezzanine - 17.jpgI’ve just discovered my new favorite SF band, French Miami. Yes, the lead singer/guitarist/keyboard-player is a friend of friends, but that’s not why I’m so enthusiastic. It’s because the band, who played at Fat City last night, plays kickass rock-n-roll with a punkrock edge that kept me dancing (and jumping up and down) the whole set. (Which, by the way, was a relief. Because I hate that avoiding-them-so-you-don’t-have-to-lie-and-say-they-were-good thing.) And the drummer, who looks like he’s having more fun than you ever will, played some of the most interesting and suprrising beats I’ve heard in a long time — and certainly from a local band. So go visit them at their website, and tell them to play more often, damnit.

Buddyhead’s famed gossip section makes trimphant return

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By G.W. Schulz

Fuck, people. Buddyhead still destroys, as much as I wanted to be over it. For the uninitiated, Buddyhead’s gossip section was a force to be reckoned with for its savage assaults on the worst of the popular music industry delivered in a relentless barrage long before blogs seriously took hold. (They go back at least six years.)

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SPEAKING OF THE MAYOR….

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Check out these threads…

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I Dream of Muni

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by Guardian intern Sam Devine

While watching Land use & Economic development committee meeting on SFGTV the other day, I caught a bit of public comment on the whole Healthy Saturday thing and had the thought: “Maybe this is more about providing public transportation to public places than it is about bicycles.”.1.jpg

At the meeting, parents said they couldn’t get to the museum for family programs, and museum staff complained about getting to work without being able to park on the street. The parking garage, at $3/hour, is cost prohibitive.

Nan Tucker McEvoy, granddaughter of museum founder M.H. de Young, spoke in opposition to closing JFK on Saturdays. “When my great grandfather gave the museum to the city, he gave it to all the people of the city, not just the ones who ride bicycles or can walk great distances,” she said

Hot and Heavy Hangover Cure

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This is Installment Number Two in our ongoing, occasional series on hangover cures, as tested by the expert drinkers of our staff (under pseudonyms, in many cases, for reasons that should become obvious). Here, in his own words, are the results of Colfax Corruthers’ ultra-scientific testing of the method of “Morning After Lovin'” following a recent all-day drinking binge.

Graphic from www.soyouwanna.com

EXPERIMENT TWO: Mornin’ After Lovin’

Day 1
11:30 Consciousness achieved.
12:00 Keg tapped, celebratory Jameson shot consumed.
2:00 Total of two beers and one shot consumed.
4:00 Total of four beers, two shots, and 1 line of white contraband consumed.

I Love Dick. You Should Too.

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The first time I heard Richard Cheese and Lounge Against the Machine, I imagined a huge 30s style musical with hundreds of dancing girls surrounding one man – Dick Cheese himself – who would be standing in a tux at a glistening grand piano. Professional lighting, gorgeous sequined costumes, a dramatic set. And the Nine Inch Nails lyrics “I want to fuck you like an animal” drifting from an old-fashioned microphone towards the audience over the staccato beats of tap shoes.

Pandora Needs Help

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by Amanda Witherell

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We just got a letter from Tim Westergren, one of the founders of Pandora, the supercool website that builds you a radio station by tracing the musical genes of song or musician you like and connecting it to others with similar aural DNA.

Tim says Washington’s cracking down and wants to hike licensing fees for internet radio sites to unfair and scary levels for this little Oakland-based music genome project. He’s worked up a petition and needs some signatures. A word from Tim to all rabble-rousers, after the jump…

Fashion for freaks (like the rest of us)

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By Molly Freedenberg

crucible fashion show - 07.jpgOh, how I love me some fire. Which is how I found myself at The Crucible in Oakland on Friday night, home of fire arts and metal sculpture and non-profity goodness. And, on this particular night, fun and funky fashion. It seemed fitting that the theme of the show, Industrial Chic, was all about using recycled materials, as we’ve been working on our Green Issue all week. But that wasn’t why I was there. No, I was there for fire and the clothes that fire lovers would make. Which, it turned out, was a good reason indeed.crucible fashion show - 04.jpg

For those keeping track …

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Pulitzers announced. Weeklies still in the game.

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Joe Pulitzer

The Pirate and the Princess

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This week, in Careers and Education, Justin Juul seeks expert help to write erotic prose. Here’s his first attempt at the easy to publish, but not so easy to write, art form. And yes, he found a pseudonym.

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The pirate costume I ordered from eBay was sitting in a box by my door when I got home last night. I took it upstairs, set it on the kitchen table, and poured myself a glass of rum. Rum…that’s what pirates drink isn’t it? “What else do they do?” I wondered. If I wanted Chloe to swab my deck for more than five minutes I knew had to be in full swashbuckler mode by the time she arrived. I could put it off no longer. It was time to become a pirate.

I popped in a bootleg copy of Dead Man’s Chest for background noise and prepared myself for a feverish Wikipedia session. Pirate lingo was all I needed, really. I had the accent down pretty good, but I couldn’t just keep saying “arrr,” and I knew words like “landlubber” and “scallywag” would only make us laugh. I cut the box open with a rusty knife as my computer booted, and then, with the blade clenched in my teeth, plunged into the Styrofoam popcorn to search for some treasure. I felt my cock stiffen as I ran my fingers over the beard, eye-patch, scarf, sword, and sexy felt hat. Arrr matey. I was gonna get some princess booty tonight.

Gore speaks, conveniently

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Intern Sam Devine snuck into Al Gore’s recent local event. Here’s his report

On Tuesday night Former Vice President Al Gore appeared at the Nob Hill Masonic Center in an event sponsored by City Arts and Lectures and the California Academy of Sciences. He spoke in discussion with John McCosker, Chair of Aquatic Biology at the Academy, on the recently championed topic of global climate change.

Copies of Gore’s books, including “An Inconvenient Truth”, were for sale in the lobby. A few minutes after 8p.m. the lights went down in the sold-out Masonic Auditorium. Greg Farrington, Executive Director of the California Academy of Sciences, gave a brief introduction; noting that the Academies’ soon-to-be Golden Gate Park building will be one of the first publicly owned “green” buildings in the nation.

Gore and moderator McCosker took the stage and sat down in the artificial living room habitat – cushy red chairs and a round wooden coffee table with tulips. Gore wore a blue suit with the standard democrat blue tie and choice Tennessee footwear – cowboy boots. It’s safe to say that no one can recall the clothing McCosker wore -– his black-and-white Wicked-Witch-of-the-West socks eclipsed all else.

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Ranting Gore
Photo from uglydemocrats.com

6 great sandwich shops

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The sandwich has both moral turpitude and spiritual strength in its legendary origins. It was named for John Montagu (1718-1792), the fourth Earl of Sandwich and member of the infamous cabal of whoring, hammered, pseudo-satanic noblemen known as “The Friars of Saint Francis of Wycombe,” but better known as “The Hellfire Club.” Montagu, who had a fondness of deflowering virgins, was also fond of eating cold roast beef between bread so he could continue gambling at cribbage without getting the cards greasy. The treat itself, however, can be traced back to the Jewish Rabbi Hillel the Elder, who lived in Jerusalem in the time of King Herod and is said to have placed Passover lamb between matzos as a reminder of the slavery of the Israelites in Egypt. At this point, though, they’re pretty damned international. And that’s what this piece is about: a bringing together of world’s disparate peoples through the common enjoyment of meat between bread. Of course, there are meat-free sandwiches as well, but my olive branch only extends so far. (Duncan Davidson)

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HOT PASTRAMI

In honor of Hillel the Elder, and his noble matzo-munchies of the Pre-Sandwich Era, I’ll start with a classically Jewish sandwich: the hot pastrami. A favorite nosh in New York, the HP, like tattoo work, is one of those “get what you pay for” items. At Katz’s Deli in the Lower East Side, they go for $13.45, with the following rejoinder written on the menu: “Ask for mayo at your own peril.” What is pastrami? It’s a beef brisket, cured with salt and spices in a brine (i.e. corned beef), then smoked. Some fancier pastrami-makers skip the brine and employ a dry salt cure followed by smoking. For the layman, you need only know the following about pastrami: it’s magic.

Comic pusher: Tha Funky Worm

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Intern Sam Devine slips between the photocopied covers ….

Down by Union Square tourists clog the streets like automatons bent on material satisfaction. You can almost hear their thoughts humming beneath their skulls like the cable car cord beneath the road.

“mmm…Neiman Marcus…bzzit…shoe sale… must…buy…”

What you can hear – all too often – are the guys who ask for change:
“Spare change?” “Help the homeless, tonight!” “Street Sheet, Street Sheet.” “Would you like to buy a comic book, sir?”

Wait: what?

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Thom creates beautiful art, as honest and brutal as the life he leads. You can find him pushing his photocopied mini-comics next to the Street Sheet sellers on O’Farrell and Powell. If he sounds familiar, you probably used to see him at 16th and Valencia hawking “Mission Mini-Comix.”

I picked up three of his little books the other week on St. Patty’s day: Burritos are the Best, The Sun Also Sets, and Tha Funky Worm – “You know,” said Thom in his West Coast stoner drawl, surrounded by the green, white and orange mayhem of the afternoon. “Like that Ohio Players cut.”

The rigors of retail

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By G.W. Schulz

From yesterday’s Examiner:

“The show could be over at a Santa Rosa music store whose owner was jailed after she refused to turn out the lights. Lisa Reed remained in jail much of Friday on suspicion of stealing electricity from PG&E to power her store without paying. Reed, the owner of Epiphany Music and Recording, rewired the store to keep the lights on after PG&E took her off the grid for not paying her bills for a year, authorities alleged.”

Is shit going that badly in the retail biz these days? On the other hand, stealing electricity is pretty punk rock.

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In releted news, Idolator is reporting that Rough Trade Records plans to open a storefront in London despite industry-wide plummeting CD sales and the slow death of Tower Records. Perhaps there’s a little life left in the retail side of the industry after all. Or, consumers have smartly used technology to circumvent corporate leeches, and the greedheads can’t figure out how to make up for it. The only survivors will be those who managed to hang on to a little indie cred. Maybe that’s being way too hopeful.

Saviours, Red Sparowes hammer furniture tacks into temples of unsuspecting fans

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By G.W. Schulz

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Saviours at Bottom of the Hill

Approximately 300 people were badly injured Friday after gusts of furniture tacks swept through the Bottom of the Hill music venue sparking a renewed interest by Congress in the safety of rock music and its potential to spiral innocent consumers into damnation.

Launched through twin Sunn O))) amps wielded by Oakland guitar heroes Saviours, the band was apparently unrepentant over the damage it had caused and vowed to bridle any attempts by authorities to turn down the volume.

Actually, for a show we heard was sold out, there was quite a bit of breathing room in which to enjoy ourselves, save for the boozy Google employees (we assumed, based on their doucheness) standing nearby and loudly droning on about how much they liked folk-punk opener William Elliot Whitmore.

Legendary! Photos of Leola King’s Blue Mirror

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Below are additional photos from the paper version of our story on 84-year-old Leola King who owned a string of popular businesses in the Fillmore District before they each succumbed to a nationwide urban redevelopment push that began in the 1940s. These images document King’s Blue Mirror club, which she opened in 1953 at 935 Fillmore St.

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Jerry Brown loses his records

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By Tim Redmond

The CoCo Times has this beauty of a report on the missing records from the mayoral administration of Jerry Brown. This kind of crap has been commonplace in San Francisco — exiting officials grab anything that might be negative or incriminating and flee with it — but I didn’t expect that from Jerry, who is not the state’s attorney general. Bad news.

No Oil War at Chevron’s Front Door

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Intern Sam Devine reports from Monday morning’s Chevron protest

At approximately 6:30 a.m. on March 19, 2007, the fourth anniversary of the Iraq War, nine activists locked themselves in a human chain across the main entrance to Chevron-Texaco’s corporate headquarters. They tied ropes and carabineers to their wrists. The carabineers where then attached to metal rods concealed inside empty oil drums and large red pipes, both covered with slogans. By 8:30, five more people had willingly joined the chain. They were all ready to get busted.

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This was the third protest at Chevron’s San Ramon since talk of Iraq began a little over 4 years ago. The demonstration, which forced employees to use a side entrance and fouled up traffic on Bollinger Canyon Road, was organized to protest of the new Iraqi Oil Law.

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Let the niners go?

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Glenn Dickey has an interesting hit on the 49ers stadium problem: The hell with it, he says; let ’em go.

I still like the idea of a San Francisco football team, but then, I also like Candlestick Park, and I always have. I even liked it when the Giants played there. But I have to say, Dickey’s got the economics right. He’s horribly harsh about the neighborhood (“There’s nothing at Candlestick Park; Hunters Point … is no better.”) That’s not true — and in theory, if the city could find land at the shipyard, the presence of the stadium would spur local restaurants, bars etc. But in practice, it probably won’t: Most football fans don’t contribute much to local business. They pack in food, tailgate and then split.
The downtown Giants stadium did wonders for either economic revitalization or gentrification, depending on how you define it. The niner games at Candlestick have done nothing for Third Street. From that perspective, a new niners stadium would be a waste of public money.