There is absolutely no way I am going to shoehorn my bowlful of Jell-O into that sparkly rainbow thong next weekend — and that’s cool, pigging out on Turtle Tower pho and Bob’s crullers is my way of dealing with stress, and Pride season brings no shortage of that! (Also I heart chubbies, so no prob.)
Luckily, Pride also brings a ton of opportunities to dance, on top of the already insane dance card SF scrawls out on the regular, so I’ll be sweatin’ like the oldies and giving you booty for daaaays (no twerking please) at these hella gay and not-so-gay-yet-still-gay-friendly pre-Pride joints:
The Border Community label head honcho casts a deep electronic spell, charming your feet while binding your mind. At the As You Like It party with Bells and Whistles, MossMoss, more.
Fri/21, 9pm-4am, $20. Monarch, 101 Sixth St., SF. www.monarchsf.com
Heck yes, as ’90s retro progresses, drum ‘n bass is having its return-to-jiggly-spotlight moment. These two bigtime old school, hard school daddies will have you jumping for joy. (Can a boy hope that this also augurs the return of actual crazy, arms-waving dancing in clubs? Tired of this slopey-dopey-boppy thing that’s been going.) Supported by the cream of SF’s classic dnb scene, don’t miss.
Fri/21, 9pm-3am, $15-$20. Public Works, 161 Erie, SF. www.publicsf.com
Heady, deep ‘n groovy Chicago duo perform live, as does cool-kid extraordinaire Ital (you may know him from a little band called Mi Ami) at the always surprising, consistently yummy Icee Hot party
Fri/21, 10pm-3am, $10-$15. Public Works Loft, 161 Erie, SF. www.publicsf.com
UK funboy Fake Blood was alsways one of the most promising producers at the tail end of hardcore electro era, but lately he’s blasted off into sheer brilliance, making some real poetry of the remains of that party-hearty sound which, alas, was co-opted to death by the pop-EDM crowd. Fake found a way out. Supported by the energetic Alex Metric.
Sat/22, 10pm-late, $15 advance. Mezzanine, 444 Jessie, SF. www.blasthaus.com
High on the list of parties that changed my life: The Playboy Mansion party at WMC 2000 in Miami. Upon entrance, someone handed me an egg-shaped maraca, Dimitri hit the decks, and I was gone for six hours. I had never heard disco mixed with house like that — Dimitri was the king of re-edit sophistication long before it became a laptop whip-up thing. I mean, I melt:
Sat/22, 10pm-late, $20. Mighty, 119 Utah, SF. www.mighty119.com
Middle Eastern queers (and friends of all rainbow backgrounds) unite: This annual Pride kick-off party is a truly special event, packed with unfamilair hotties, sweet tunes, and drums and belly dancers even. “Shake those hips” with DJs Emancipacion and Nile, and the Shabnam Dace Company.
Sat/22, 9pm, $10-$12. Club OMG, 43 Sixth St., SF. Advance tickets here.
More Pride kick-off shenanigans, this time in the form of beloved rare-find bathhouse disco king DJ Bus Station John taking to the decks all Sunday evening at the Eagle! Disco at the Eagle — somehow it makes sense but breaks the brain. Sweaty tunes (hi-NRG!) ‘n cruisy men — what more could you ask for? Oh yes, cheap beer. And menergy.
Sun/23, 7pm-midnight, $5. SF Eagle, 398 12th St., SF. www.sf-eagle.com