By Juliette Tang
Vulva themed necklaces from VulvaLoveLovely‘s Etsy shop
Bear with me as I draw a comparison between Nora Ephron and vulva necklaces that may seem at first glance unintuitive. At the time that I read it, Nora Ephron‘s book on femininity and aging, I Feel Bad About My Neck: and Other Thoughts About Being a Woman, had a significant impact on my understanding of the ways a woman’s relationship with herself can change as she ages, largely due to social pressures that manifest themselves in self-negating ways. The book’s effect was probably amplified by the fact that I was young enough at the time to have no cogent thoughts or opinions on the aging process, so I trusted Ephron’s authority on the matter. It was depressing to say the least. While Ephron’s title refers to her dissatisfaction with the appearance of her neck, it was the way she described her singular relationship with, of all things, her purse, in an essay titled “I Hate My Purse,” that struck me the most.
VulvaLoveLovely’s Frida Kahlo uterus plushie
In the essay, Ephron writes, “I hate my purse. I absolutely hate it… This is for women who hate their purses, who are bad at purses, who understand that their purses are reflections of negligent housekeeping, hopeless disorganization, a chronic inability to throw anything away, and an ongoing failure to handle the obligation of a demanding and difficult accessory…”. This quote was immediately interesting to me because — while Ephron doesn’t attempt to draw any direct correlation in the piece between purses and anatomy — one cannot deny the presence of Freud in Ephron’s text (or subtext). For Sigmund Freud, purses (or what he called “reticules”) were a potent vaginal symbol. In Freudian psychoanalysis, a woman’s relationship with her purse could be read as representative of her relationship with her genitalia or, stretching the metaphor further, her femaleness. This is not to say that Ephron hates her femininity. Few people these days are true believers in Freud anyway. But in the ongoing dialogue about feminism, femaleness, and beauty, I think these ideas regarding purses is worth contemplation.