By Justin Juul
Being an American sucks in a lot of different ways — it’s basically impossible to live here and not be fat, you can’t drink in the streets, etc — but perhaps worst of all is the fact that absinthe is illegal. It doesn’t sound so bad on its own, but think about the repercussions of such a pointless ban: we have to drink waaaaay more than most Europeans in order to get drunk, we have to do mushrooms or acid if we want to hallucinate, and to top it all off our art is suffering. Look around you. Where are our Picassos and Van Goghs? Where are our Oscar Wildes and modern-day Hemingways? The answer is as sad as it is obvious. Our creative geniuses are either too strung out to work or rotting in rehab centers because they had to turn to heroin instead of absinthe.
Picasso’s “Absinthe Drinker”
Thank god for loopholes. The people over at Lit have discovered that, although straight-up absinthe may be illegal, there’s nothing in the books that says you can’t make candy out of the stuff.
Suck and spin
Save an artist this Christmas. Order some Absinthe Lollies now.
Absinthe Lollies are available at Miette Confiserie and through Lit’s Web site.
Miette Confiserie
449 Octavia Boulevard, SF
(415) 626-6221
www.miettecackes.com