May 31-June 6
March 21-April 19
Hmmm, what’s this opportunity we’re detecting in your sphere this week, Aries? Is it a new phase of development you’re entering, or is it just a breath of fresh air some to revive your sagging spirits? Whichever it may be, the potential to create something of real meaning is real, just as long as you keep your ego in check.
April 20-May 20
Taurus, we are soooo happy that the shit has finally stopped hitting the fan. You needed a break. Now that life has calmed down some, we’d like you to think about how you maintain balance and interdependence outside of conflict. We think you might need to make some adjustments to the way you deal with life when it’s peaceful.
May 21-June 21
Gemini, can you find some sort of flow this week? Some way to get right with the various vibes and energies swishing around you? Not to be a hippy, but if you don’t it looks like you run the risk of feeling some anxiety. And if you do, we think you’ll find yourself optimistic about the future without attachment to any specific outcome.
June 22-July 22
Cancer, what is wrong with you? It looks like you’ve found something or someone that makes you so wicked happy, and now all the happiness has begun to make you wicked sad! Well, indulge your melancholy is you must; unlike the happiness, it’s not going to last much longer.
July 23-Aug. 22
Leo, while you’re in the midst of totally overhauling and restructuring your entire life, we urge you to make room for freedom. Don’t hop out of one set of binding circumstances to then fling yourself into something equally constricting. That would be dumb. Put some Wild Cards into the fabulous deck of your life.
Aug. 23-Sept. 22
Virgo, we meant to write ‘don’t let the bumps on your path distract you from the excellentness you’re capable of’, but instead we wrote ‘sexcellentness’! And that’s it, Virgo — you’re burning with potential and creativity this week, and sex and art are two great ways to be present with yourself in the midst of so much sexcellent energy.
Sept. 23-Oct. 22
Libra, can you go swimming and keep your hair dry? can you say no to someone without ejecting them? These are the sorts of questions you people are grappling with this week. And the answer is yes, but we can see that you haven’t figured that out yet. So you’re going to worry and worry and worry. Oh, well.
Oct. 23-Nov. 21
Scorpio, this week it’s okay for you to fake it ‘til you make it. In fact, we encourage such fakery. We think it will be the secret to your success. If life requires you to have a glowing tan, but you’re too scared of melanoma to bake yourself by all means, spray it on. No one will know but you. We promise.
Nov. 22-Dec. 21
Sag, you’re not going to feel very clear this week. But you can still be out and about in the world without creating tons of damage. Go and participate in your life, stay open and active, just don’t make any commitments. Offer yourself in an authentic way, but without giving everything away.
Dec. 22-Jan. 19
No jumping around from idea to idea this week, Capricorn. You’ve got to focus. Get very clear about your intentions, and then sit back and let it all play out. You don’t have much control, but if you can muster up some faith in things panning out okay, you’ll manage not to stress.
Jan. 20-Feb. 18
Aquarius, there are too many cooks in the proverbial kitchen and you are confused about who’s ass gets the boot first. There are creative ways to handle the strains and stresses of firing a fleet of chefs, but you better be present with your needs if you want to pull it off well. It all looks really overwhelming.
Feb. 19-March 20
Your feelings aren’t going to go away, Pisces. They’re your feelings, you’re going to have to deal with them. We do hope that you find a way to indulge your emotions without looking to everyone watching (and yes, everyone is watching) that you’re a heartless drama queen. Figure out why, just when you were having such a good time, you freaked out.
Award-winning writer MichelleTea and intuitive counselor JessicaLlanyadoo have been fraternizing with fate for the past lucky seven years. Call Lanyadoo for an astrology or tarot reading at (415) 336-8354. Write to Double Team at firstname.lastname@example.org.