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5 Things

5 Things: March 11, 2011

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>>SHE WANTS TO BE WHERE THE PEOPLE ARE For years Ariel Soto has been documenting her fashion finds found while hitting the streets of San Francisco on sfbg.com. She’s finally compiled her satorial spreads into a book, and will be giving sneak peaks of it to the lucky trendoids that find their way to her photo show at Density tomorrow, from 7-9 p.m. We’ll be in attendance to see if our off-shoulder velour onesie made it into her best-of pics – and of course, to check for Herald and Biko.

>>LEND A HAND Now that your East Coast relatives have been assured you’re not washed out to sea floating on nothing but your bedroom door and trusty, humanized volleyball, you can turn your thoughts to the next item of business re: the Japanese tsunami disaster. That being how to help the earthquake and ensuing waves’ survivors. Here’s a good place to get started.

>>WITHOUT APPS WE’D BE RUNNING AROUND NAKED The proliferation of completely uneccesary apps – well to be calling it a problem would be giving excess technology too much creedence, so let’s just saying it’s fucking irritating. But seriously, this one is growing on us: swackett, which has taken the head scratching out of our daily what-do-I-wear conundrum.

Seesaw: sleek and stain-resistant

>>LARGE COFFEE WITH ROOM FOR CHILDREN We’re tickled pink by some of the new cafes opening up around town (including Tell Tale Preserve Co.‘s pop-up pastry-and-coffee-stop in Big Daddy’s Antiques, Tell Tale Trunk Show). But then, we’re old enough to walk into any patisserie in town and no one’s gonna groan and roll their eyes. Not so for those under the age of eight! And so it for youngster’s rights that we welcome the arrival of Seesaw, a stark Hayes Valley joint recently opened by a child psychologist that incorporates an airy, engaging play space into the cafe’s floor plan. Parents (and those that don’t mind youngsters dashing about during laptop time) can order a tasty sandwich and a cuppa from the joint’s impressive tea menu and chill while their youngster attends one of Seesaw’s convivial “brunches,” which focus on developing social awareness, grace, and friendship-building skills.

>>SHAKE IT, DWIGHT This Yello song from 1980 has been following us around to a bunch of different clubs lately — from alternative hip-hop, to minimal techno, to soulful house, to new school vogue. Could it be the dance music version of “The Office,” embodying a weird nostalgia for a faceless manufacturing and processing sector in a recession and outsource culture that’s all but decimated it? Maybe, but it’s still a jam.

5 Things: March 8, 2011

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>>1. PETA HOPS We had no idea that Anchor Steam is vegan. Now we can throw back a case and pet our potbellied pig, Sir Skrumpkins, guilt- and irony-free. (Apparently many beers use animal gelatins for filtration.)

>>2. FAREWELL SKRUMPKINS And here is how to safely dispose of your dearly beloved, earthly departed pet potbellied pig in Northern California.

>>3. ONE-TWO PUNCH Speaking of drinking, one of the oldest bars in  SF, Elixir in the Mission, is also one of the most forward-thinking. The joint’s hand-crafted, organic cocktails are out of this world. Under the stewardship of owner H., Elixir’s just redone its menu. Olde Sydney-Town punch, honey kumquat caipirinha, Meyer lemon cucumber collins — these are just three of the mouthwatering new concoctions. (When we start to use phrases like “mouthwatering concoctions,” you know we need a drink.) Bonus: patrons receive a complimentary pisco punch while waiting for their cocktail. And no, it’s not like a Hawaiian punch, we checked.

>>4. GUNS AND BUTTER Overheard at the new Whole Foods in the Haight, much ado about the new scientifically validated checkout line system (also experienced at the SoMa branch). First introduced in New York City, the system uses a single line, or two, that feed into a passel of registers, all controlled by a single, cute, traffic cop. Although there are already reports of doofuses stepping out of turn, the system reportedly shrinks wait time to less than two minutes. Not so much of a hit, though, are armed security guards, apparently ready to draw their weapons on yogurt-stealers. “That’s what we pay for at Whole Foods, right?” commented one dude in the bakery line. “The wholesome experience.” (Please support your local, possibly unarmed grocer.)

>>5.THIS IS PARADISE Take a risk. Wear it inside the club. Now is the time to see ‘Shades,’ a new video by SF’s David Enos and Mishell Stimson.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NCUD8UEBaSQ

5 Things: March 4, 2011

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Each day, our staff picks five (or so) things we think might interest you

>>MONKEY MAN We can count on one hand the email newsletters we get that are an actual thrill to see sitting unopened in our inbox, and Kirk Lombard‘s is one of them. Lombard knows every. Thing. There is to know about Bay Area fishes (he’s a world champion monkeyface eel fisherman and runs urban angling classes outta ForageSF that are an absolute gas to attend): identifying them, catching them sustainably, eating them, respecting their majesty. He’s got a dope blog, but his recent March newsletter clued us into these aquatic happenings: the spirinchus starski is jumpin’, California halibut season is starting (rent a kayak, Lombard says, for optimal fishing of these guys), and a list of items you might not guess would make servicible monkeyface eel fishing poles: a paint-roller extender or golf course flag.

Guanajuato: let the tequila take you

>>DEJA THAT AGAVE If you’ve harbored a mad hankering for Guanajuatan food — washed down with well over 150 tequilas — then head to Tres, formerly known as Tres Agaves, which reopened March 3. The joint’s been redone to make it a little cozier for diners, who used to jostle with drinkers. The menu’s getting a remodel, too — chef Kelvin Ott is expanding beyond Jalisco, to explore the cuisines of Michoacan, Guanajuato, Nayarit and Tamaulipas. Bonus: Happy hour prices are running at all hours of operation through Tues/8: $5 fresh lime margaritas, $3 Mexican draft beers, and $2 chicken, pork al pastor, or rajas tacos. Did we mention tequila?

>>PILLOW TALK Last chance to snuggle up to needlepoint pillows depicting JFK’s assassination and convenience store holdups, on view at Jack Fischer Gallery through Sat/5. Are they more inappropriate than the dirty pillows by Kevin L. Muth or Ethan Maxx  — “The extra X means fun!” — in the window of Chi Chi LaRue’s West Hollywood vanity shop? You decide.

>>HELLA BOOKS, HELLA CHEAP That’s what they’re calling it, and it says it all. Get hella books hella cheap at the Adobe Books sidewalk sale, Sat/5, 11am-2pm. There will be snacks, and records will be played. Score some fresh spring reading — hopefully fresher than “hella.”

>>NO BONES ABOUT IT Back in 2007, we talked about contemporary art and pop culture’s love of skulls, and the cranial passion has carried on, thanks to the likes of Technicolor Skull, Kenneth Anger’s band (!) with Brian Butler, featuring the octogenarian filmmaker on theremin. Instead of a Technicolor skull, the cover art for the debut album by Swedish noise attackers Black Bug — created by San Francisco musician and designer Nathan Berlinguette  — presents a Necco-tinted one. Sweet!

5 Things: March 3, 2011

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Each day, our staff picks five (or so) things we think might interest you

>>1. SUSHI FROM SPACE “U. F. T Ume Fried Tai: fried red snapper in u.f.o shaped sushi served with balsamic raspberry sauce

>>2. HOP TO IT Bahama Kangaroo. That’s the ace sometime-moniker of Yukako Ezoe, along with her husband, Naoki Onodera. It’s also the title of Ezoe’s new art show, opening tonight at Kokoro Studio at 682 Geary St, SF. The fact that two of Ezoe’s main influences are John Audobon and animation and color master Yokoo Tadanori is enough to convey her uniqueness, but it only hints at her playful deployment of fabric, paint, and even metal (she also makes jewelry). Ezoe is one of those rare people who can party hearty in the most fun ways at night, help the likes of Larkin Street Youth Services and Precita Eyes during the day, and still find time to do her own work. She’s a wonder, and her opening — for a series of self-portraits that are a definite change in terms of in subject matter — should be a blast.

Yukako Ezoe at work on a children’s mural in 2006

>>3. ZION I LOVE YOU Oh Zion I, dreamiest hip hop group in the Bay Area: you’ve already organized your fans into mass meditation sessions, released seven albums of beats so good you almost forget the lyrics laid over them are uplifting as well, and you’re really hot. Now you’re donating ticketing fees to a community circus arts program? The group’s upcoming Fillmore show with the Grouch (Sat/19) benefits the Inner Sunset’s Acrosports  program, teaching 18-monthers through adults how to tumble with grace. Word on the street is the school’s capoeira squad will take the stage at the Fillmore between songs from the crew’s dope new album, Heroes in the Healing of the Nation. We’re listening to our press copy right now, and “I Used to be a Vegan,” plus the tracks featuring Los Rakas, Brother Ali, and Silk E … ah, sogood. (Check the new sound with the Grouch here.)

>>4. HOMESTEAD SWEET HOMESTEAD Did you know that that the phrase Urban Homesteading™ has been copyrighted? (It’s kind of a big scandal). Ploughing those trademarks aside, why not indulge in the spit-and-polish DIY ethics of How-to Homestead’s “11 in 11 Tour”? Each month, the resourceful website is visiting one of SF’s neighborhoods — there are apparently 11! — and thrwing a gaggle of workshops in handicrafts, mending, urban agriculture, and more — plus potlucks and occasional squaredancing! On Sat/5 they’ll be near the Castro at the Harvey Milk recreation Center in Duboce Park, where surely we hope there’s a live demo of this important Castro-related information:

>>5. LES VAGUES BLANCHES Bay Area producer extraordinaire Jason Quever trades slackness for varied arrangements and sings expressively on this lovely moment from the new Papercuts LP:

5 Things: March 2, 2011

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Each day, our staff picks five (or so) things that may interest you

>>1. FAREWELL, FUDDLED FERNER True local character Henry Africa, the inventor of the fern bar, has died. Long live the fern bar!

Barhopping locals of a certain vintage would know him from the legendary, fern-filled Henry Africa’s bar in the ’60s Polk area, yuppies would know him as the owner of one of the storied “Bermuda Triangle” bars in the Marina, Dartmouth Social Club, in the ’80s. And young bucks would recognize him as the guy in the easy chair with oxygen tubes in the window of hanging-motorcycle bar Eddie Rickenbacker’s near downtown. A life planted in bars, one might say…

>>2. OSCAR IN HER MOCKET Now that the mobs stoning James Franco (if he could be any more stoned) and perma-giddy Anne Hathaway have dispersed, let’s turn our attention to a bright spot in this year’s Academy Award ceremony. The Bay Area’s Audrey Marrs had an Oscar for Best Documentary Feature bequeathed to her by none other than the almighty force known as Oprah, and she was one of the evening’s best-dressed attendees and most well-spoken winners. Marrs (whose sister Stella pioneered indie crafts long before they became a commercial juggernaut) has frequently been written about by the Bay Guardian as a member of the rock groups Mocket and Bratmobile, and she struck Oscar gold with only her second venture as a feature producer. Congrats Audrey!

>>3. PEOPLE GET READY We were already getting all futsy about the looming 2012 presidential elections (Newt? Really?) when we caught sight of this new, impending apocalypse billboard from the windows of the heathen SFBG offices. No way, May 21st, 2011 is Judgement Day? This 4/20 we can cheef like there’s no tomorrow — and mean it! P.S., proceed with caution to the website indicated by billboard ‘o doom, unless you have a mind for a good old-fashioned San Francisco: Sodom screed. 

Oh, and for all you faux-Mayan maniacs (and disaster flick addicts) who though 2012 was our expiration date? Um, suck it

>>4. STRATEGIZE WITH ME Here’s a smooth new clip from up-and-coming local rapper DaVinci:

>>5. GUSTON IN THE WIND The publication of local poet and rascal Patrick James Dunagan’s first book There Are People Who Say That Writers Shouldn’t Talk: A GUSTONBOOK is proving to be timely. It can function as a discursive counterpoint to University of California Press’s expansive and just-issued Philip Guston: Collected Writings, Lectures, and Conversations. Also, on March 14, Dunagan is joining Guston’s friends and collaborators Bill Berkson and Clark Coolidge for “Philip Guston: A Life Lived + Discussed,” a program at the Balboa Theatre that includes discussion and a screening of Michael Blackwood’s 1981 documentary Philip Guston: A Life Lived, which is narrated by the artist himself. 

(Poetic trivia alert: the evening’s bookstore-record store sponsor,Bird & Beckett, has a little thing in common – namely, the initials BB – with 2008 Goldie winner Berkson.)

5 Things: March 1, 2011

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Each day, our editors pick five (or so) things that might interest you

>>1. FEEL THE HEAT Here is a map of downtown San Francisco’s extensive underground steam delivery system.

>>2. BOARDING FELIX A new cat hotel “experience” is opening this month in the Mission — Mission: Cats, natch. “Our facility is specifically designed for the cat adventure: from teetering wall ledges and looming cat towers to hidden cat nap caves and prime window frontage (sun bathing and bird watching included).” Yes, but what about true Mission adventure: saggy unwashed stretch-jean butt, recombinated fixies, and leftover “you know you’re gonna still eat it” burritos? Goodness, Mission hipster jokes are tired. Bring on the kitties!

>>3. ASSANGE FEVER Well we’ve gone and missed Oakland Museum‘s Political Poster Jam, hellfire. Luckily, SF artist Eddie Colla has helpfully blogged about his contribution to the Fri/25 radical art-in, a stencil piece of Julian Assange™ surrounded by words like “information is power,” “domino effect,” and “freedom of speech.” The museum also invited the Great Tortilla Conspiracy Theory and the SF Print Collective and we’re officially blue about finding out about it after the fact. (h/t Demotix)

>>4. A RIOT, A QUEEN RIP Jane Russell, noted bombshell and bigot. In any case, at least this little number from Gentlemen Prefer Blondes proves that, no matter what, at least the closeted gay bodybuilders of the ’50s still salute you. As did the queens in the fabulous recreation below of that very number, “Ain’t There Anyone Here For Love,” from a 2004 tribute at the Castro Theatre, starring drag chameleon Matthew Martin. Russell was in the audience, and, according to the event’s organizer, Marc Huestis, she “thought it was a RIOT. What a SHOWGIRL she was.”

>>5. HEY DJ or music producer or instrumentalis or vocalist or anyone at all interested in an all-expenses-paid month in Tokyo as part of the Red Bull Music Academy: have you sent in your application yet? If you want to know more about what it’s all about, hit up this special orientation party on Monday, with Beats in Space DJ Tim Sweeney, analog synth and drum machine inventors Dave Smith and Roger Linn, and RBMA Academy alum B. Bravo. It starts at Public Works and then moves to SOM for extra dancing and hobnobbin’. Should be a real who’s who of Bay Area talent.

5 Things: February 28, 2011

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Each day, our editors pick five (or so) things that might interest you

>>OSCAR AND ANN L.A. performance artist-sitcom regular Ann Magnuson is one of our favorite people ever (ask her about crashing in our tent at Burning Man). Sure she’s pretty famous, she ruled ’80s downtown New York, and she is, in fact, the Power of Pussy. But she’s funniest when she’s just straight-up laying down some home truths. Here’s her viral Oscar rant and here’s the film she should have won an Oscar for:

>>BUT STILL, MILA’S DRESS WASN’T ENOUGH TO SOOTHE OUR RANDY NEWMAN-INDUCED RAGE Return to a time when Hollywood rewarded more glamor, less non-threatening paunch — the Balboa Theatre is turning 81 this year, which means it was born the same year as Marilyn Monroe, Hugh Hefner, Harry Dean Stanton, and Cloris Leachman (to name just a few — 1926 was a very good year!) Of course, it was a tragic year too: silent-film hunk Rudolph Valentino died at the age of 31. This year’s Balboa birthday bash (March 6, 7 p.m., $10) pays tribute to the original Italian Stallion with a screening of his 1922 high-seas adventure Moran of the Lady Letty, which was filmed right here in San Francisco and Tiburon. Swoon! Frederick Hodges performs an original score to go with the film, plus there’ll be a magic lantern slides, short films, a live vaudeville show, talks by Valentino experts, and birthday cake for all. www.balboamovies.com.

>>GET YOUR CARNAVAL ON Controversial, yet totally back up-able stance: Carnaval blows most other SF parades outta the grandstand. Sequined spandex, dope Latin beats, and way less corporate involvement than say, the SOUTHWEST AIRLINES Chinese New Year Parade, plus it’s in the Mission – how funky can you really get surrounded by the evil towers of the Financial District? Mission Cultural Center’s putting out the call for dancers in its parade contingent this year, so for anyone who is looking for a little workout, and a whole lot more sabor in their lives, sign up for the bi-week rehearsals to strut the streets as part of the center’s Pre-Colombian-style festivating at the May 29th parade. Email carnaval@missionculturalcenter.org or call (415) 821-1155 to make it happen.

>>IT’S EARLY, BITCH Britney’s coming to the Castro for an a.m. appearance on “Good Morning America” at which throngs of sleep-deprived acolytes will vie to supply her with Hot Cookies and Seconals.

>>THERE’S NO PLACE LIKE SMALL HOME Frigid temps making your flat seem like barren, fossil fuel-sucking tundra? Heard. Would that we all had a small home, whose energy-efficient ways are ever-so-in-right-now – and beyond adorable. Look at them

Contibutors: Cheryl Eddy, Caitlin Donohue, and Marke B.

 

5 Things: February 25, 2011

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Each day, SFBG staff pick five (or so) things that might interest you

>>1. OHLONE, NOT BANKSY Jet Martinez and other Bay street artists are raising funds to resurrect SF’s oldest mural, an Ohlone wall painting tucked away behind a wall in Mission Dolores that artists rediscovered in 2004. The Ohlones did the art, apparently, under “supervision” of the Spanish missionaries at the time.

 

Hopefully Jet and co. won’t be threatened with indentured servitude and torture while they recreate the stunning shape-based work on the Mission Market building at 22nd and Bartlett, where it will watch over the kick-ass Mission Community Market on Thursday afternoons when the stands kick back into gear on April 14th.

>>2. HIGHBALLS ‘N LEGWARMERS Slow Comfortable Screws, Kamikazes, Birthday Cake Shots, Pink Squirrels, Frozen Strawberry Margharitas — yep, the retro ’80s cocktail movement is upon us (help?). You can journey back to the days of an only slightly less creepy Tom Cruise at the Heaven’s Dog “Drinks of the Eighties” event on Sat/26

>>3. TWO TO TIMBUKTU So you’ve been struck down global weirding’s unfortunate by-product: the “how’d it get so chilly again, it was 80 degrees two weeks ago!” cold. Never fear, just grab an easy-on-the-eyes graphic novel and glory in your bedriddeness. Casey Scieszka and Steven Weinberg, indie media couple par excellance – the duo’s Shitty Kitty write-draw-drink meetups are the epitome of intelligent cute-snark — have got just what the doctor ordered. Their new book To Timbuktu looks like a novel on the outside, but inside Scieszka’s tale of their post-collegiate world wanderings accompanied on each page by Weinberg’s effortless sketches make for multimedia fun time. (There’s a guide to beijing street food!) If you like what you see very much, get your copy signed by the two at their upcoming Mission: Comics and Art reading on Saturday, March 5.

>>4. LEFT BEHIND This picture by Ed Ou reminded us of the cost (and the gain, for some, especially in the US) of globalization and doing business with psycho dictators.

“Migrant laborers from Bangladesh working for a Chinese company watched as Chinese nationals fleed the unrest in Libya on a ship bound for Greece. Sixty-two Bangladeshis have been left behind by their employers who have not returned their passports.”

>>5. BART ON FLIP Local SF songstress Emily McLean proves that for a lovely little video, all you need is a BART pass, a Flip, and some fly kicks. You can catch her playing at Hotel Utah on March 10th, and trust us, her act even better when you can see her face and stuff.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=357Thd-ThxI

Contibutors: Caitlin Donohue and Marke B.

5 Things: February 24, 2011

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Each day, SFBG staff pick five (or so) things that might interest you

>>1. BEARING JOY A little while ago, a Potrero Hill resident took the concept of neighborhood watch to new (artistic) heights when he came across some brazen red graffiti scrawled across the side of the Cor-o-van building on 17th street near Texas. “I just got sick of looking at it,” the impromptu artist said.

His solution was to paint over the mess, and he admits that he “got a little carried away.” The stretch of corrugated steel now blooms with red flowers, an orange tree, a rabbit in a hole, and a family of posy-sniffing bears. The artist has been adding to his outdoor menagerie on select sunny days for a few weeks now, serenaded by IZ Kamakawiwo’ole’s “Somewhere over the Rainbow.” 

>>2. REFRESHING FACE SALAD A partial list of superfoods: lemon, ginger, tomato, potato. Delicious, all, and now available for your face. Imperial Spa sells facial masks infused with the aforementioned treats – we got tricked out in the tomato the other day during our 90-minute aromatic acupressure treatment and it left us feeling fresher than a chopped salad. If you’re on a budget you can always sport the masks in the spa’s cheap-to-use day facilities. 

>>3. HEBREW-HOP Four-DJ Israeli juggernaut Soulico is rolling into Public Works tonight. (It’s free before 10:30 and only $5 after.) Soulico mostly teams up with quite famous US hip-hop acts like Lyrics Born, Rye Rye, and Ghostface Killah to produce a madly fun, well-produced hybrid of Israeli folk music and good-natured rap. But they also showcase some Israeli rappers that are little-known elsewhere, like Axum, whose hilarious and charmingly low-tech Soulico collab video below for “Pitnum Banu” makes us feel simultaneously hungry and stoned. Or something? Axum probably won’t be on tour with Soulico, but we’re hoping theyll brng their musical mischief (and may some good falafel) our way soon.

>>4. CINEMATIC MAPS If you haven’t read Rebecca Solnit’s amazing Infinite Cities, which reveals and collages hyperreal cartographies onto our Baghdad by the Bay (particular favorites: butter fly habitats vs. queer public spaces, the Third Street Phantom Coast, 2008 murder sites vs. 2009 Monterey Cypress growths) — then you’re in for a real alternative historical treat. Rebecca will be at the Red Vic tonight, helping raise money for another awesome project, Cinematic San Francisco, a “a multi-media event to address the past and future” of San Francisco’s presence in the movies, and its dreamlike, projected presence in the imagination. Are we still a city of fantasies?

>>5. HELL FREEZES OVER So Zeitgeist has re-opened after its remodel, to raspy sighs of relief from every raggedy biker (and wannabe) from here to the Excelsior. The rapacious rumors of outdoor bathrooms have not yet born fruit — though construction activity in the back of the patio against the building suggest that soon you’ll have more options for emptying those pitchers out of your bladder — but there is about 1,000 more beer taps now, in classy aisle formation behind the bar. HOWEVER by far the most exciting upgrade is the veggie burger the Zeit kitchen is now using – those things flirt with being an inch think! That’s a lot of animal-free deliciousness. And hey, weirder things can happen.

Contributors: Emily Appelbaum, Caitlin Donohue, Marke B.

5 Things: Fat Angel butters

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Five flavors of butter you can order at fab new Fillmore bistro Fat Angel:

1) lemon caper sage

2) garlic chili

3) maple bacon

4) chocolate cinnamon

5) orange blossom honey