American Idol: The weeping edition

Pub date May 20, 2011
WriterTim Redmond
SectionNoise

Six weeks ago, who could have imagined — the American Idol final is Scotty and Lauren? Please. So many talented people gone, so little talent left ….


I like Scotty, I really do, despite the religion and the aw-shucks sheepishness. I think he’s a sincere kid who will have a great career as a country music singer. But AI is supposed to showcase broad-based talent, and that’s not him.


Lauren is also a nice kid, and the scene with her crying as she viewed the flood wreckage was way, way over the top, but sincere. (In fact, there was an awful lot of weeping this week. Scotty wept all the way home. The only one who didn’t seem overcome by emotion was Haley, who was also the best performer. But I guess it’s all about the televised tears. You cry and you love God and you get a recording contract. What a great country.)


A few noteworthy moments in the penultimate week:


Ryan reports 95 million votes. Somebody’s got an app out there.


Steven once again has gold glittery pants. It goes with the feathers in his hair, I guess.


Shameless huckerism just gets worse: The three finalists get to go to the special showing of “Super 8” — followed immediately by an ad for “Super 8.” The kids all look miserable doing their final Ford music video.


Then on comes — ready? — Il Volo, a group of three young Italian opera singers who sing “O Sole Mio” in Italian. They’re totally talented, no complaints, but it’s really odd and the three finalists are kind of dumbfounded.


There’s a six-second appearance by 50 Cent, who looks as if he’d rather be anywhere else in the world.


The videos of the carefully orchestrated “home visits” are long, dumb and about as sappy as it gets. Lauren’s bodyguard is gigantic. Then we go on to the results — and it’s clear that the voters have been so wrong for so long that the show is becoming a farce. Good people gone? Pia. Casey. James. Now Haley. Any of them could have been legitimate finalists. But it’s all about the cuteness and the emotion, and I’m over it.


Final prediction: Viv wants Lauren, because she says (and it’s a good point) that Scotty and James will wind up with great careers anyway, but if Lauren finishes second and doesn’t get the Idol contracts, she’s never going anywhere on her own. But come on — it has to be Scotty. It’s not even a choice. At least he’s good at something.